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Started by Calistine, October 16, 2009, 03:35:01 PM

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Calistine

October 16, 2009, 03:35:01 PM
Bleh. Ive been going by Kyle and its been good and all. It feels like me because Ive been using it for me. I like it but my therapist said I can't be impulsive. I need to pick a name that fits me. And his intuition tells me it doesnt fit, and I agree with him a little.
Ive been looking at names and I picked 3 others.
Randey, Torry, and Erik.
My middle name is victoria so I picked torry but I dont know.
Randey Im not sure.
What do you think?
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Calistine

#1
October 16, 2009, 03:44:59 PM
Quote from: Kvall on October 16, 2009, 03:43:58 PM
I think Erik is a great name. But if you like Kyle and have been using it for a while, what's wrong with it? Do you mean your therapist told you he didn't think it suited you? That's just his opinion; it's yours that's important.

For your middle name, what about Victor?
Yeah I was thinking victor. I dont think it suits me.
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Lachlann

#2
October 16, 2009, 07:57:48 PM
Don't let your therapist speak for you, but if you really do feel it doesn't fit you then take your time.

From the other thread where Alistair was picking out names. I saw one that fit me, my only problem is people will have to get used to it, but I think it fits... even if it's a tad bit unusual.

Names are hard to pick out. In the end it has to be you that feels comfortable with it, not someone else. Which one feels like you?
Don't be scared to fly alone, find a path that is your own
Love will open every door it's in your hands, the world is yours
Don't hold back and always know, all the answers will unfold
What are you waiting for, spread your wings and soar
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Calistine

#3
October 16, 2009, 08:10:54 PM
Quote from: Tristan H. on October 16, 2009, 07:57:48 PM
Don't let your therapist speak for you, but if you really do feel it doesn't fit you then take your time.

From the other thread where Alistair was picking out names. I saw one that fit me, my only problem is people will have to get used to it, but I think it fits... even if it's a tad bit unusual.

Names are hard to pick out. In the end it has to be you that feels comfortable with it, not someone else. Which one feels like you?
Ive really gotten used to kyle
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Lachlann

#4
October 16, 2009, 08:19:03 PM
But do you think the name Kyle fits you? If it does, then I don't see a need to change it.
Don't be scared to fly alone, find a path that is your own
Love will open every door it's in your hands, the world is yours
Don't hold back and always know, all the answers will unfold
What are you waiting for, spread your wings and soar
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Nero

#5
October 16, 2009, 09:22:16 PM
It's kind of messed up for your therapist to bring his opinion that it 'doesn't fit you' into it. His opinion could be based on anything, the fact that all Kyles he's known are blond, anything. It's just a personal opinion. And personal opinions about another person's personal data are usually wrong.
Nero was the Forum Admin here at Susan's Place for several years up to the time of his death.
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DamagedChris

#6
October 16, 2009, 09:45:18 PM
Agreed with Nero...you look like a Kyle to me, but that means jack squat coming from me as much as your therapist. Pick the name you want. You're the one who gets to live with it.
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wabbit2

#7
October 16, 2009, 11:39:44 PM
Quote from: Nero on October 16, 2009, 09:22:16 PM
It's kind of messed up for your therapist to bring his opinion that it 'doesn't fit you' into it. His opinion could be based on anything, the fact that all Kyles he's known are blond, anything. It's just a personal opinion. And personal opinions about another person's personal data are usually wrong.
Totally agree here! If Kyle is the name you are happy with stick with it!
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Teknoir

#8
October 17, 2009, 12:29:34 AM
I agree with everyone here. If you like the name, then screw what the therapist says. Everybody has different associations with a name.

It'd be rash if you changed it legally after a week or something, but I don't think testing it out in common usage is being rash. How else are you supposed to know if you can live with it or not?

I'm of the opinion that when we hear the right name, it'll click. Or something like that. Mine just kept poking me in the back of the brain for 10 years until I figured out why and what to do with it :laugh:.
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Luc

#9
October 17, 2009, 05:25:03 PM
I think you look like a Kyle. But if YOU don't think it fits you, that's what counts. Screw the therapist; if you like it, if you believe it fits you, and you've already become accustomed to it, what's the harm? Heck, if you decide 5 years down the road that you're more of an Erik, or Victor, or Horace, for that matter (yes, I know, Horace is a terrible name!), you can always change it again. Who's to say all this name stuff has to be permanent just because it's legally sanctioned?

Just make the decision that's best for YOU, not your therapist. Kinda makes me happy I never had to do therapy to transition.

SD
"If you want to criticize my methods, fine. But you can keep your snide remarks to yourself, and while you're at it, stop criticizing my methods!"

Check out my blog at http://hormonaldivide.blogspot.com
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Calistine

#10
October 17, 2009, 05:42:06 PM
Quote from: Sebastien on October 17, 2009, 05:25:03 PM


Just make the decision that's best for YOU, not your therapist. Kinda makes me happy I never had to do therapy to transition.

SD

Lucky you XD Well therapy is helpful my therapist is just being a pain in the ass.
And thanks everyone. Im keeping my name
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Radar

#11
October 18, 2009, 12:22:19 PM
I find it very odd your doctor said that. Mine asked me what I wanted to go by. I told him my first name is fine because it's unisex with the male spelling, but my middle name has definitely got to go. It's waaaay to feminine and I've always hated it.

He asked what my middle name is and made some suggestions on a male version, but I had already decided what it would be. I told him and that was it- no more discussion about it. No trying to change my mind or anything. It's your name- make it something you want. Few people rename themselves- take advantage of it. :)
"In this one of many possible worlds, all for the best, or some bizarre test?
It is what it is—and whatever.
Time is still the infinite jest."
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YoungSoulRebel

#12
October 21, 2009, 07:48:09 PM
Quote from: Nero on October 16, 2009, 09:22:16 PM
It's kind of messed up for your therapist to bring his opinion that it 'doesn't fit you' into it. His opinion could be based on anything, the fact that all Kyles he's known are blond, anything.
On this, I agree.  Of course, my parents (I kid you not) chose my birth name via rock paper scissors cos (I continue to kid you not) ultrasound technology was just new enough when I was gestating that my mother's doctor misread the umbilical cord as "It's a Boy", so they'd only picked out boy's names (and by the sounds of it, they hadn't totally settled on what my boy's name was supposed to be, either); parents naming children is rarely based on what "best suits" the child, if only because a newborn baby's personality typically is pretty dull.  Serious, who knows what a newborn is going to turn out like?  And both David Bowie and David Korseh are pretty different Davids, huh?  As are Kyle MacLachlan and Kyle Boller (link).

It's one thing if you think it doesn't really suit you, and the advice to pick a name that you feel suits you is pretty sound, but I'm not sure that even one's therapist is the best judge of whether or not somebody's choice of name "suits" them. [shrug]  Just my 2¢.
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Walter

#13
October 21, 2009, 08:14:09 PM
Kyle is a good name. I once thought about using the name "Stan" once..

Ok I'll stop here xD. But no seriously, Kyle is a good name
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Calistine

#14
October 21, 2009, 08:35:43 PM
Quote from: Walter on October 21, 2009, 08:14:09 PM
Kyle is a good name. I once thought about using the name "Stan" once..

Ok I'll stop here xD. But no seriously, Kyle is a good name
Every person i know whos name is stan is an ass. Except for stan on south park of course.
I like kyle from south park but I didnt name myself after him. I thought to myself when I came out boom thats my name. It feels like me.
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YoungSoulRebel

#15
October 21, 2009, 08:43:29 PM
Quote from: Kyle XD on October 21, 2009, 08:35:43 PM
Every person i know whos name is stan is an ass. Except for stan on south park of course.

I dunno, Stan on South Park is a bit Libertarian, and so my instincts are to think he's kind of an ass by default.  He's considerably less so than most Libertarians, though.
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Walter

#16
October 21, 2009, 08:59:15 PM
Quote from: Kyle XD on October 21, 2009, 08:35:43 PM
Every person i know whos name is stan is an ass. Except for stan on south park of course.
I like kyle from south park but I didnt name myself after him. I thought to myself when I came out boom thats my name. It feels like me.
I've never known a Stan. Be glad you don't know an Eric Cartman though xDD
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Radar

#17
October 22, 2009, 08:49:51 AM
Quote from: Kyle XD on October 21, 2009, 08:35:43 PMEvery person i know whos name is stan is an ass.
My Dad's name is Stan. He can be an ass sometimes- but we all can. Overall he's a very good man... and I'm not biased at all. :)
"In this one of many possible worlds, all for the best, or some bizarre test?
It is what it is—and whatever.
Time is still the infinite jest."
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LightlyLuke

#18
October 22, 2009, 03:00:05 PM
My dad was Stan also. I was never wild about the name Stanley.

Barack Obama's mom was named Stanley.
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Radar

#19
October 22, 2009, 08:01:04 PM
Really? That's the first time I've ever heard Stanley used as a female name. I'm sure there was confusion abound for her.
"In this one of many possible worlds, all for the best, or some bizarre test?
It is what it is—and whatever.
Time is still the infinite jest."
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