Why do I come to Susans? Well there is no other T* resource quite like it. The rest of the T* sites on the web are, in comparison, rubbish.
Personally I would prefer to be banned from this place because it is too addictive for me. I get too drawn into the discussions and spend far, far too much time here. The negative posters really get to me and it sets me off. I can read the forums without getting too upset but having the ability to respond to the nay-sayers just sucks me in and upsets me. I come across people who sometimes just seem to want to argue and run other people down and tell them that they are wasting their time transitioning and I cannot stand on the sidelines and I get drawn in to the discussion. I find myself unable to stand aside and watch a person wanting help being told that they are wrong or will always be ugly or unable to pass. There is enough pain in transition without having that rammed down your throat.
It is just not Susans, it happens on other forums too, but this one is so much easier to use and so much more active that the effects are worse for me. I have had accounts here in the past. With the first one I got really badly upset by a group of five posters and I practically ran screaming from the forum. With the second account, when I deleted it I emailed Susan and asked her to block my IP address (which is static) so I could never access this place again because I knew I would be back. I guess she did not because here I am again.
I am not blaming Susan for this. That would be both inane and ungrateful of me. Many people find great comfort here and this place may have even saved lives. No, I know the fault is mine and the flaw lies within me, but that does not make it any less painful for me.
