Buying female clothing dressed as male

[Cindy]

Great news Randi,

Isn't funny how at every challenge we are SOOO scared; go through with it and feel great. There is no stopping us. I think, and I apologise straight away if this upsets anyone, that a 'proof' of our true gender is the drive to go out and be our normal gender in face of our fears; nothing can stop us in the end, we have to be true to our nature, shivering and screaming inside .
I love shopping as Cindy, even if I don't buy, I love looking and trying. Don't get me started on shoes .
I remember the night when a GG friend called and said she was having Christmas drinks that evening and did I want to come over. When I told her I would but only as Cindy, she was dumbfounded. I was terrified. A great night about 20 plus people met their first TG person and were so nice I felt I blended straight in.

I know this is of no use in the USA but Innerwear, a discount intimate clothes warehouse in Adelaide, wrote to a TG group I was a member of and just said if anyone wants fittings just ask their consultants. I tried them and great, no red faces, just professional attention. I was taken around the shop and shown bras my size, all in front of other customers, I was in drab, I've now been there as normal and no one has said boo. The funniest thing is the guys who wait nervously at the counter or even outside the shop as their girl friends/ wives etc shop. What is it about guys catching girl germs?

Anyhow.
Hugs Randi, and to everyone else

Cindy (36C)
Post Merge: November 07, 2009, 02:09:52 AM
Alyssa,

I did get a laugh when I asked in the changing room "Does my bum look small in this"



Cindy

[El]

I went shopping yesterday after work, bought a cute black racerback top, some leggings a 3-pack of panties and some trousers. Got the size right on them all except the trousers, long enough but way to baggy lol. Bloody terrifying experience bt i went somewhere where i was unlikely to meet anyone i knew so i wasnt constantly looking over my shoulder. The biggest issue the trip brought up was my lack of closet space, my girly corner is getting a bit too tall to be hidden and i dont really feel ready to start dressing outside of my room. oh well lol!

I really want to buy some dresses/skirts but they didnt have any that i liked so im gonna have to find another store where i wont see anyone i know with a better selection

[Genevieve Swann]

El, I have the same problem with closet space. I guess it is time to get rid of the male attire. The skirts and dresses are not going.
Cindy, Now what about the shoes? Can any of us pass a shoe store or the shoe Dept. without at least browsing?

[Constance]

Can any of us pass a shoe store or the shoe Dept. without at least browsing?

I don't wanna talk about it.

My closet has my man-stuff on one side, and my woman-stuff on the other. The main reason is that I use the man-stuff more often so it's on the easier to reach side (the woman side is partially blocked by my digital piano). But, there's just too much empty space on the woman side. These BLEEPing things like food and shelter keeping taking my clothing money!

[kaide]

Only thing I can say is, go with friends. Friends make a big difference in your confidence. When ever I shop I always go with friends, because if anyone says anything, you have a friend with you to come to your defense.

I've bought clothes, panties, bras, ect, dressed as a guy. Lol I went to the mall the other day with a friend and we went into Victoria's secret and there was a deal 5 for 25, so I got five pairs, and when I went up to the register I heard, hey your so and so's brother right? I'm like umm yeah...and I reslized she's the girl my brother tried dating *they are good friends still* That was a bit awkward considering she lives like a block down from me. She just assumed it was for my friend I was with, thought she was my GF. So that's another plus about taking a female friend, most people assume its for her

[aurora17]

On week-ends, I dress in androgyne clothing (actually women's trousers etc). Partly because I still have that pesky male face (FFS scheduled for next spring) and because male clothes do not fit anymore.

As for other people having a second look at me when I shop for, say underwear (my underwear has been of the female kind since the beginning of my transition), it happened once or twice that they told me these were for women, and I just answered "well, it's my size, and I'm not a man". They are sur not going to check my genitalia after all, and I just tell the truth.

[Cindy]

El, I have the same problem with closet space. I guess it is time to get rid of the male attire. The skirts and dresses are not going.
Cindy, Now what about the shoes? Can any of us pass a shoe store or the shoe Dept. without at least browsing?

Hi Genevive,
How are you Honey. What is it about shoes? I can go to a store and look at clothes, undies etc but it's a sort of ingrained "Oh is there anything new" type look, unless I'm looking for a purpose. But shoes How and why are shoes, and handbags just so buy able. 

I can imagine prehistoric humans. Him, Well I've just invented the wheel, it's going to revolutionize the species. Her, I've just invented shoes, you haven't a clue how big that's going to be.


Cindy

[El]

lol you know he wouldnt have invented it if his lady hadnt nagged him too anyway

[Cindy]

lol you know he wouldnt have invented it if his lady hadnt nagged him too anyway

So true El and guess what, they are still out in the yard fiddling with the thing on wheels, which hasn't changed shape. And we have new shoe designs in the shops to get.



Cindy

[CDVeronica2]

I've bought things for myself many, many times.  I never really worried about shopping.  I've bought presents for my wife many times and often clerks just assume you are buying clothing for someone else.

Once I decided to try something on, the first dozen times I was scared to death, but now I've learned that the sales clerks don't care, they get their commission regardless of who is buying.  I just try to be pleasant and courteous.  Generally I try to shop in women's stores instead of department stores, if I want to try things on.  I'll just ask politely if it would be possible for me to try these items on, and I've never been refused.  I used to try to shop on weekdays, but now I'll shop anytime.

Most of the clerks have been very helpful, and some seem to really enjoy helping a guy shop for themself.  And all the other customers don't really notice you.  And if they do... so what. 

I've gotten so that I just love shopping for myself, and I've got more women's clothing than men's, even though I've never been out in public presenting as female. I know it's scary, but it's really worth it.

Veronica

[justmeinoz]

The phone trick sounds good.  I have carried a shopping list as cover, like I am buying for someone else.  Then realised that people really aren't watching me like a hawk anyway! Once I worked out sizes, it's quite easy.

[Suzy]

Then realised that people really aren't watching me like a hawk anyway!

Yes that's the main thing.  We have this silly notion that the world revolves around us.  Just go your way and do your thing and you will be fine.

Kristi

[Katie.D]

If you're more concerned about "budding" than anything else have you considered using daisys?
http://www.galapagosboutique.com/Nipple-Covers-s/157.htm
One size (hopefully) fits all 

How many (if any) of you buy female clothing for yourself while dressed as male? I have bought panties. socks, tops, or jeans but before long I am going to need a bra if for no other reason than to hide my nips which are now clearly visible in most of the shirts I wear. Have any of you bought bras while dressed as male? While I usually have not recieved much attention from other women while shopping, there have been one or tow who looked at me like I was crazy for even being there. Maybe their insecurities were showing that day. I need to go look for a bra but am feeling a bit insecure myself today.

Randi

[AweSAM!]

I always say that I am shopping for my girlfriend!  When I go, I make sure I have an idea measurement wise, and I generally get a store employee to help me out (sort of) with picking the clothes. Never have I had any questions from anyone, but only comments of 'that's a cute thing to do'.

[tekla]

I always say that I am shopping for my girlfriend!  When I go, I make sure I have an idea measurement wise

I have a pretty good idea they know dear.  Anyone in fashion retail, who is good and has been at it for a bit, can look at people and tell what size they are.  You give her those sizes and measurements and her first thought is - well how interesting, those are your exact sizes too.  But salespersons want to make sales.  That's the bottom line.

[AweSAM!]

I always say that I am shopping for my girlfriend!  When I go, I make sure I have an idea measurement wise

I have a pretty good idea they know dear.  Anyone in fashion retail, who is good and has been at it for a bit, can look at people and tell what size they are.  You give her those sizes and measurements and her first thought is - well how interesting, those are your exact sizes too.  But salespersons want to make sales.  That's the bottom line.

I have thought about it, and you're more than likely right. I rarely believed they knew, and other times, I'm not sure. Oh well, go figure.

[Alyssa M.]

That's just one of those social courtesies. It's a rule of etiquette that one should not dispute the narrative a person presents about themself without a very good reason.

[Claire Troward]

I work in a different sector of the retail world, but I can vouch for the fact that sales people are not paying a lot of attention to you.

Still, knowing this, I'm still scared of going into a store (major department store or boutique) and buying clothing!  There's a lot of good advice in this thread ... I'll give it a shot!

[tekla]

Some major department stores like Macy's and Nordstrom's have policies in effect that work against discrimination.  Someone in accounting must have sent out a memo saying that the money is the same no matter who is buying it.  I know that for years here after the big strike at Macy's when so many girls went by and expressed solidarity, or brought their favorite sales girls coffee while they were walking the line really helped.  Smaller boutiques - of course I'm in SF here, but still - have a great attitude, they tend to staffed by people a little more hip, and they need the money even more.

[Erica2Sweet]

...One tip might be to get fashion magazines.  Don't look at the runway pictures, that's 'clown' stuff, but the other content is great.  There are plenty of tips on styles, makeup, skin care, etc  .. and just looking through the magazines will help you develop a better sense of different fashions and looks...

Also, it may be helpful to request some paper catalogs from some popular apparel companies such as Spiegal, Chadwicks, Metrostyle, ect. All big apparel companies have a site where you can sign up for a free catalog. Basically what you see in those is what women are wearing. This has been a big help for me over the past couple years in developing a sense of style.