STEALTH

[V M]

Now, the other day I saw some guys all dressed in black with guns on their belts and those communication devices in their ears (what are those called?).  They looked like they thought they were pretty stealthy.  One or two of them looked like they might be worth going for stealth if it included them.

- Kate

I've seen some of those guys playing about on the beach carrying logs and rubber boats about and yelling at each other. Every so often one of them will ring a bell. Then a bunch of them will gather up their toys and go play with other folks

The other mermaids and I can't help but giggle as we watch them play about 

[Naturally Blonde]

Hidding, divisive, taboo? I missed the buss on this, but appearently this is something very important? What am I missing? I've been on hrt for almost 10yrs, but I don't know about this stealth. Is this what the cool ts people are donig, or is just rouge group? Do I have to stealth to move fowarad? Please, will someone tell me about this stealth.

It's usually the one's that pass 100% who are stealth. I try and be stealth and it works most of the time but I know I'm not as passable as some who are able to pass 100% in every situation. I've also been on HRT for 10 years but I am aware I still need to work harder than I am to achieve my goal.

It's important not to knock those who have achieved their goal or those who started very young and HRT worked well for them and they are able to live undetected as a normal fermale. Many of you knock success and many of the successful TS's also knock us or look down upon us. We should all except who we are and where we are no matter what the situation.

[The None Blonde]

Personally, I live stealth.

I don't see why this animosity exists so blatently in the trans community... 99% of stealth people really don't care about 'putting non stealth down'.

Here's a quick rundown of my week...

Monday: Class, work, see friends (No time to put down non stealth ts)
Teusday: Class, Library, Friends, (no time... getting the message?)
Rest of week: no time for putting down transfolk on the internet,...

I, as a functional member of society am quite busy.... I rarely get chance to reflect on trans.... and when I do, I really can't see a benefit to putting anyone down. It wouldn't benefit me.... or make me feel better.

What is stealth?

Stealth is getting the hell on with life, and not having people go 'oh hey look its a dude!'

Anything else is 'my vagina is deeper than yours!' Syndrome.

I've been here a couple of weeks, and ive seen 4 topics on stealth... A lot of people either have the memories of goldfish, or need to grow up.

[K8]

Dee, I don't hate you.  Personally, I don't bother with stealth because no one around here seems to care whether I'm TS or not, so why should I?  I am also of an age where dating is pretty far down on my to-do list (somewhere below vacuuming out my car, I think ).

I, and I think many others here, understand your attitude given your situation.  I've been blessed with never having lived in your area, but if I did I think I would be trying to figure out a way to move away.  But if you can't afford a name-change, that probably isn't in the cards.

Hang in there, dear.  You've got a tougher road to walk than many of us do.  And try to stay out of those canals.

- Kate

Oh, and if "stealth" is just living as you are - a woman with an odd past that you don't talk about but don't worry about hiding - then I guess I'm stealth.

[taru]

Complete stealth seems impossible for me. I operate with a "Don't ask, Don't tell" mentality and it seems to work quite good.

The places where stealth is impossible are:
* doctors, "so why are you taking that much estrogen"
* living partners, "so why are you dilating"
* people doing background checks, "so why do the state records list an old inactive male social security number for you"

Also sometimes rumors are an issue, someone hears gossip, but that is quite rare these days.

[Korlee]

You know reading this thread tells me I really should lurk more.  Is there really that much arrogance, dislike, and bad feelings between those that pass well?  And those that do not?  Those that choose stealth and those who choose to be open about it? I mean does it really effect them in any way?  As long as someone is not forcing their belief on you who cares?

I have never understood that part of humanity that does this to others and I doubt I ever will.

Myself though?  Down the road?  I do not plan to tell a soul.  I will have fixed the problem and have moved on.  My business is my own and the world has no right to it.  Especially not when I've seen the way it treats one another when it gets a hold of anyone's secrets good or bad.  I can only hope I pass well enough that I raise very few eyebrows if any.

[Hannah]

I think Bellas original point was to kind of laugh at ourselves for the way we always get our collective panties all knotted up over this topic and wind up in big dramatic debates. Come on kids let's just drink some of her foul corked wine, do our nails and talk about boys instead of arguing over this again lol.

[The None Blonde]

You know reading this thread tells me I really should lurk more.  Is there really that much arrogance, dislike, and bad feelings between those that pass well?  And those that do not?  Those that choose stealth and those who choose to be open about it? I mean does it really effect them in any way? 

I'm going to get flamed for this.... But 99% of argument and disquiet in such topics, comes from the non stealth people.... and they have the audacity to claim 'stealth' people are hostile to them....



Wake up.... we really dont give a flying badger about whether you pass or not, or choose to live your life as 'out' 'in' or 'shake it all about'.

As many have said here, lets just get on with life...


As for boys; Where do I sign up? Boys are fun

[Hannah]

Last week the same boy fed me all I could eat coconut shrimp, then a few days later he took me to a steakhouse to pick at a bowl of pasta while he devoured a steak that I swear still had a pulse. I think he has a thing for fat girls because he was very concerned about the volume of
my meals. Boys are awesome, lol, even when they aren't trying. Besides that they smell yummy.

[Dana Lane]

I seriously do not see why people being stealth or non-stealth should ever be an issue. I know someone claimed that non-stealth is hostile to the stealth people but personally I never saw it.

Everyone should just respect each other's decision to be stealth or not and worry about other things much more important like what color you are going to paint your nails this weekend. Everyone has their own reasons for living their life the way they want.

[Northern Jane]

I suppose "stealth" is impossible. I had SRS at 24, in 1974, and no other surgery. My doctors know my medical history and some of my friends.

I spent 24 hours on the weekend with a straight guy who doesn't know and I think he might have been suspecting something "out of the ordinary" by the time we parted but NOBODY ever gets a closer look or closer experience than that (if you know what I mean    )

So am I "stealth" or not? I don't care.

[Sarah Louise]

Stealth to me just means living my life without broadcasting things all over the place.

I know I can't hide my past from people who knew me before, sometimes you just have to bite the bullet and admit to your past (like when the high school reunion committee called), but so what.

What's the big deal with just wanting to live your life without all the drama.

Sarah L.

[Bellaon7]

Last week the same boy fed me all I could eat coconut shrimp, then a few days later he took me to a steakhouse to pick at a bowl of pasta while he devoured a steak that I swear still had a pulse. I think he has a thing for fat girls because he was very concerned about the volume of
my meals. Boys are awesome, lol, even when they aren't trying. Besides that they smell yummy.

Some day my dreamboat will sail in, sweep me off my feet, & buy me anything I want off the $menu! I hope he drives a nice car too...

[Steph]

I'm going to get flamed for this.... But 99% of argument and disquiet in such topics, comes from the non stealth people.... and they have the audacity to claim 'stealth' people are hostile to them....
...

What is really inflammatory is remarks like this.  You prove to me right now that 99% of "Non-Stealth" folks do that.  I doubt very much that you know 100% of either the stealth or the non-stealth folks here.

Folks should focus on the question posed which was:

Is this what the cool ts people are donig, or is just rouge group? Do I have to stealth to move fowarad? Please, will someone tell me about this stealth.

Geeze!

-={LR}=-

[Bellaon7]

What is really inflammatory is remarks like this.  You prove to me right now that 99% of "Non-Stealth" folks do that.  I doubt very much that you know 100% of either the stealth or the non-stealth folks here.

Folks should focus on the question posed which was:

Geeze!

-={LR}=-

And just what is THAT suposed to imply?!?! And what is the name of that Red Hot Chili Peppers song about the airplane?
Post Merge: November 09, 2009, 06:51:34 PM

What is really inflammatory is remarks like this.  You prove to me right now that 99% of "Non-Stealth" folks do that.  I doubt very much that you know 100% of either the stealth or the non-stealth folks here.

Folks should focus on the question posed which was:

Geeze!

-={LR}=-

Post Merge: November 09, 2009, 04:52:17 PM

What is really inflammatory is remarks like this.  You prove to me right now that 99% of "Non-Stealth" folks do that.  I doubt very much that you know 100% of either the stealth or the non-stealth folks here.

Folks should focus on the question posed which was:

Geeze!

-={LR}=-

[Steph]

And just what is THAT suposed to imply?!?! And what is the name of that Red Hot Chili Peppers song about the airplane?
Post Merge: November 09, 2009, 06:51:34 PMPost Merge: November 09, 2009, 04:52:17 PM

Huh???

-={LR}=-

[taru]

I think that that the disagreement is much more about what 'stealth' means.

I don't think most people can be totally stealth as that typically requires changing countries and ceasing all contact with family, otherwise e.g. people doing background checks will know.

[The None Blonde]

What is really inflammatory is remarks like this.  You prove to me right now that 99% of "Non-Stealth" folks do that.  I doubt very much that you know 100% of either the stealth or the non-stealth folks here.

Folks should focus on the question posed which was:

Geeze!

-={LR}=-

If you read that properly, you'd see i said 99% of arguments, not 99% of non stealth people.

[Hannah]

I don't have any animosity toward other transsexual people who don't want to be around me, whatever their reasons might be. I only know a couple others even remotely nearby though and I don't particularly like them as people, regardless of anything else.

Although, if a woman with transsexual history living in stealth didn't want to be around me, well, I really wouldn't know that would I.

[Steph]

If you read that properly, you'd see i said 99% of arguments, not 99% of non stealth people.

My mistake, I apologize for that.  So I'll rephrase...

Show me where:

99% of argument and disquiet in such topics, comes from the non stealth people

....

It's general statements like this which create division.  I think it would be fair to say there are probably an equal number from each camp who have this we-they attitude.  It serves no purpose but to boost ego's.

-={LR}=-