how do you find a gender therapist

[arbon]

If none list themselves as dealing with that particular issue do you just start calling and asking?

[Flan]

I would recommend trying therapists who work with gay/lesbian clients
http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/prof_search.php

a bit of a shot in the dark depending on where you live, but better then hunt and peck (good luck)

[Arch]

We have some lists here in the TG Portal. Start on this page. https://www.susans.org/Health/Therapists_and_Counselors/. Pick your country (if it's there), then proceed from there. If you're in the U.S., you should be able to find someone relatively close. And these lists are by no means complete. A little googling with the right keywords will get you some other lists. And if you have a local LGBT center, you can call and ask if they have any names.

Good luck, and keep us posted.

[arbon]

Jeez, that was really nerve racking calling. But found one that will be a 300 mile round trip drive for me to see. Did not talk to her just her receptionist but telling her that I am looking for someone with with experience with transgender / gender identiy issues she says she could understand how hard it is to find someone in this state about that issue, but that this is a good person to see about it. So a couple weeks. Funny but I was like shaking after the call.

[Arch]

Funny but I was like shaking after the call.

Congratulations! Calling can be scary as hell, but you did it!

I'm not surprised you were shaking. I was shaking so hard when I first called my therapist that my voice was noticeably shaky. He could hear it on the other end. But now we have a great relationship. I hope you will too. If not, try to find someone else. But one step at a time.

[Nicky]

Well done arbon! yay you!

This is a really huge step.

[EveMarie]

I was in a quandary also, swallowed my closet pride and asked my GP for a therapist, "dealing with gender issues". He kinda raised his eyebrow, but gave me the name of a Ph.D. and I've never been happier in my life.

Good Luck arbon, Evie

[arbon]

It did not go well letting my wife know I set up an appointment, and after telling her I did I immediately felt like I had made a mistake in doing so. I should have talked to her more about it first. Even though we had talked about me doing this in the past she has been under the impression that I have been "coping" alright, so letting her know that I had made an appointment took her by surprise and hurt her.

[EveMarie]

arbon, sweetie, I found that as I discovered myself and the inner girl I possessed, I couldn't remain as descrete as I wanted. It was these feelings of self discovery that made me realize I had to divulge and share those feelings with my SO. Even though I eventually ended up in separation, we came to understand each other, though in ways that were difficult at best to deal with. In my case this may be the best, I hurt, she hurts, but we are going our ways and have gained knowledge regarding our relationship.

I hope the best for you in your endeavors to gain guidance, in discovering who you are.
hugs, Evie

[sarahm]

Get a referral from your doctor. That is what I've done. =D