I lost hope, then I gain hope. Then I am up and then I am down?

[Megan]

This is getting annoying for me, but my emotions (I believe; and my thoughts) go from the worst to the best to the unreal. I do not believe a psychiatrist could help me much, since I am not all horribly depressed or insane.

I know I am human, and humans have feelings and such, still... a normal person does not think, "I wish life was better, life is depressing, life sucks, I suck, I am ugly, I am fat, I need some money, I am going to do something to make a lot of money" and on and on. Then maybe the next couple hours they will be, "I am so hot, I can get anything I want, Life is awesome, I am going to change this world, F all people, People should worship me, start worshiping, I am going to look hot today, and I am going to get out of this all. ". I am conflicted about education, and it is like this, "I need to get education to be upper class, and be wealthy and rich, and compete with doctors and lawyers. I'll go to college, and get into medical school"... then it's like this, "I am not sure if I should waste my time with education, and do something much bigger..."

I am not asking opinions about what I should do about my life. It's like I have huge CONTRASTING views on what I am, what I am doing, it's like there's 2 people in my body. Not that i have a split personality, but it's the same thing, I change and change, and change.

I am just wondering if anyone experience so much conflicting opinions, mental states, beliefs within a matter of hours???

I believe if I get this solve, then I might look at trans sexuality in a different light. I cannot make huge decision like that without thinking, "Am I making a rational decision or am I just trying to find out if the grass is greener on the other side?"
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[tekla]

go from the worst to the best to the unreal. I do not believe a psychiatrist could help me much

That is the textbook definition of bi-polar, and a lot of people are helped by medicine it seems.

[Megan]

go from the worst to the best to the unreal. I do not believe a psychiatrist could help me much

That is the textbook definition of bi-polar, and a lot of people are helped by medicine it seems.

I love myself today, and I do not any need to transition... at all. This may or may not lose it's impact on me, but I accepted my image more or less. It doesn't help that I have like 5 men liking me either. I lost my desire to transition whenever I have guys liking me.

Men are "enchanted" by me , especially the shyer/weaker ones, even if they could be straight.

Then I am much happier when I go with my instinct career goal... and not think about college, or fooling myself that is what I want to do for the rest of my life.

I got to lead a political movement, that's it... I am going to have to take the risk,, since I won't be happy otherwise.

ever

[Randi]

Hi Megan, Are you certain that 'normal' folks do not have those thoughts? I have times when I go from one extreme to the other-but then I am not Normal!!! Never have been. If this is causing you a lot of problems dealing with it you know you should see your therapist before it really gets to you. Hang in there and don't think we don't care about what you are going thru! Bye for now,
Randi

[K8]

This is getting annoying for me, but my emotions (I believe; and my thoughts) go from the worst to the best to the unreal. I do not believe a psychiatrist could help me much, since I am not all horribly depressed or insane.

My understanding of therapy is that it is to help you deal with how you are.  You don't have to be clinically depressed or insane to benefit form therapy.  Just wanting to be able to handle life's ups and downs (or the ups and downs of your emotions) can be enough to benefit from help.

Running hot and cold - having doubts, thinking all is wonderful and then lousy, etc. - is normal, I think.  If it's extreme, then perhaps you need help to bring it all into the normal range.  JMHO

- Kate