Being Pansexual, some questions for you.

[Alainaluvsu]

I'm not offended, Padma. Just wondering what's with all the confusing terms. But I've seen people toss around poly / pansexual or whatever just because somebody else is attracted to a trans woman (not necessarily here). That DOES offend me. But anyways, I'm not too sure what's up with all the different labels. Why poly, pan, pomo, omni, auto ... seems like every 2 years there's a new sexuality. If someone is only sexually stimulated by crossdressing men dressed up as female pirates, is that a new term? It just gets really confusing, is all

Not knocking sexuality by any means. If you're attracted to certain people -  I'll fight any discrimination associated with it (aside from pedophiles). I guess for me, if you're attracted to men, women, and everyone outside of the genders - you're trisexual

[Shawn Sunshine]

If your attracted to an intersex person, some would view that as being attracted to a 3rd gender or both genders at the same time, so i guess that could technically make you bisexual since you find both the male and female parts of that person attractive.

But I also find the personality traits and mannerisms of gender attractive, hence why i prefer to like tomboys, because they have a certain blend of masculine and feminine traits (both physical and mental,emotional) that i find really appealing. But as I started to accept myself and I am still in the process of doing so I find myself reaching out further in the gender spectrum.

I don't have a problem with labels actually at all, If I was to list myself on a dating site It is a way to let other people know I accept them as they are and in turn would know who I am.

I can see why a person could be offended to say they are something other than gay, lesbian or straight, but I like the idea of a few extra labels, it gives me choices which immediately gives someone a clue as to what i don't and do like.

[Constance]

If I were to be in a relationship with a trans/woman, that to me would be a gay relationship. If I were to be in a relationship with a trans/man, that to me would be a straight relationship.

I differentiate to "pan" because I know people who are not on opposite ends of the binary. If I were to be in a relationship with a male-bodied two-spirit/bigender person, it could be offensive to them to describe it as gay or straight. At that point, the relationship would be best described as queer, to me.

Let's take for example a "crossdressing [man] dressed up as a female pirate." How does this person self-identify? If they self-identified a straight cis-male crossdresser, that would be heterosexual attraction for me. If they identified as a gay cis-male crossdresser, a relationship with me could not be truthfully described as gay or straight, but queer.

My own genderqueer offspring (sonter? daun?) is a female-bodied genderfluid person: sometimes they are the woman who is my daughter and sometimes they are the man who is my son.

To me, these things aren't labels but merely the words I use to describe myself. To me, it's just descriptive vocabulary. And also to me, discussions like this in relationships are extremely important. Without communication there can't be a relationship (even if it's just about sex; one still needs to know what one's partner wants and what you want your partner to do for oneself).