I have a strange question to ask, since this forum deals with psychology more than my other favorite forums, I guess this would be the place. Well I have a great desire to be this one person in my head, and I let this person be expose sometimes. It's like a drunk party girl I guess... personality wise... then I have this angry guy in me.
I am mostly in the neutral stage, where I am nice, but I am not overly nice but just nice. This is at work, and people worship the ground I walk on.
At school I am neutral, but I lack all qualities of personalities because I do not want to expose myself in case my brother sees me differently, which it goes to the family. At home I am either angry or just like "I am grander than you all", hard to explain but I only talk about myself.
But this drunk girl stage was expose a little at school, which I didn't want to happen much. This guy slapped my butt with a yard stick, and he was like smiling at me, and all, and I guess my voice changed with him, it just became more "smooth" I guess, like I was drunk. He was even kind of far from me, so I have no idea why he did that.
Then this guy was like offering help to lift something at work (I could pick it up... guys don't pick things up for you, ya know), and then he was like putting his hand on my shoulder when talking to me. And I even made a point to call this woman hot to him, I do that to guys a lot to make sure they get the memo I am not gay. And the math teacher I really hated last semester was like 3 inches to my face and I kind of back up from him cause he was like this close, and giving me more extra credit points for him. I don't even know why he likes me all of a sudden... because he was smiling at me intently like staring into my eyes.
I don't get it, but I like it. But I don't get it. I can't turn "straight" guys gay for me, and I am not even attracted to these guys.
But if I tweak into the drunk girl personality could that be the reason??? I did it a lot with this one dude, and now he's like calling my name in the hallways but in a nice way. My hair is longer (to my shoulders now), could that be it? I am also thinner.... but I am not a girl physically... these are straight guys. What's the deal?
Post Merge: March 09, 2010, 03:01:34 PM
oh i just realize i post this in the wrong area of the board. i meant to put this in general