When do I start to change?

[Confused.paul]

I have wanted to be like a woman for 4 years, but I have always been too nervous to try changing anything, I haven't told my family because they might hold it against me, but my doctor and a councillor knows.
Should I tell my family, or is it best not to?
How long should I leave it for before I try changing, or should I just go on the way I am for while, because I'm worried that if I try to look like a woman, people will still recognise me as a man, that might upset me?

[cynthialee]

Ok first slow down. Catch your breath.
I would sugest doing some reading on GID. You have to know the enemy (gender dysphoria) and the comon tactics ussed to defete it if you want victory.
Aparently you already seem to know yourself well enough.
Stick around this forum for a few days and get to know the people that share this disorder with you. It can be whooped.
As for outing yourself to friends and family and the speed at which you should transition are completely up too you.
I leave you with a proverb from Tsun SU:
So it is said that if you know your enemies and know yourself, you can win a hundred battles without a single loss.
If you only know yourself, but not your opponent, you may win or may lose.
If you know neither yourself nor your enemy, you will always endanger yourself.

Good Luck
Hugz
Cynthia Lee

[K8]

First off, welcome to Susan's. 

Be sure to look under the Announcements heading.  There you will find the rules we live by in this little world of ours: "Site Terms of Service and Rules to Live By", "Standard Terms and Definitions", and "Post Ranks".  Look through the other stuff there, too.

It certainly can be confusing to be transgendered or gender variant.  You will want to build your base of knowledge of what it all means to you so that you can go forward.  Conselling usually helps a lot - talking with someone who is trained to help us sort out all our confused feelings.

As Cynthia Lee said, this is a complex thing and you need information to help you decide what you want and need to do for yourself.  There's plenty of good information here and lots of helpful people, so jump in and explore.

Happy exploring.

- Kate

[jesse]

welcome to susans hun i agree do some research and by all means take your time there are a lot of things you can do that wont out you
jessica