My cousin is amazing

[jessica rose]

My cousin is the only member of my family I am out to at the moment and if the rest of them take it as well as she has I will be over the be honest. I remember telling her I was Gay and then being to scared to tell her about being male to female so I sent her a text I which I felt bad about doing really but she assured me it was fine and she was fine about it to as long as I was happy she would be happy for me to anyway yesterday she visited me and my parents for a chat just to see how things were the two of us ended up going on a little trip to Swansea to have a little bit of lunch followed by a little shopping and a long chat about me and my transition.

She asked all sorts of questions about my future plans then she stopped turned to me and asked " So have you chosen a name yet" to which I told her the two I've been seriously thinking about Victoria and Jessica she replied without batting an eyelid Victoria isn't you Jessica is though then we had a whole conversation about middle names and will I keep my family name after I've changed my first name I said it depends on how everyone takes it really if I need A clean break (which I hope doesn't happen) I will change it then.

while we were shopping we had a chat about clothes and shoes and how and where I see myself in a couple of years to we both had an amazing time chatting and it was great to have a face to face chat about transition and my future hopes to we both decided we needed to go and have a proper shop in a couple of weeks time I'm currently booking the train tickets for a visit to Bristol where she's decided I need a prper outfit and were going to get a new wig that suits my face and A set of make-up for my skin colour to as she is a hairdresser and a beautician to.

she has been amazing all the way through for me and we both can't wait until I'm more like her big sister than her big brother to I love my cousin she's Ace.

Jess xXx

[Sarah B]

Hi Jessica Rose

No, your cousin is not just ace, she is one very rare diamond.  By the sounds of it she will make your journey so easy, especially in the initial stages and with her skills she will make it very easy for you.

I sense she did not come over to see your parents but especially to see you, this shows you that she accepts you unconditionally for who you are and to make sure that you were alright.

When you go to Bristol, have the following conversation with her in regards to who you will tell next, if that is what you want to do.  In that conversation determine how each individual in your family will accept you if you decide to tell them about yourself.

I left my family and friends, with out telling them what I was going to do and I changed my last name, so they could not find me.  However, my family found out and long story short they accepted me unconditionally.  What I know now, I should not have changed my last name and doing so now would be more of pain.

However, if it does not go according to plan then as you have alluded to you can change your last name if need be.

Take care and best wishes for the future, you do have a wonderful 'sister'

Kind regards
Sarah B
PS That was a lovely story, thank you for sharing it.

[jessica rose]

Thank you Sarah

My cousin and I have always been very close even with the age gap I'm 30 and she's 20 the only time we haven't seen eye to eye was when I was sat with all the grown ups at her 17 birthday party but that was more tong in check on my part really I guess it was the realisation that I was 26 then and not still 19 like I thought I was in my head lol!

I've sort of had the Who to tell next chat with her to and it's going to be my sister when she comes to visit me the last week of august It's ideal timing for me as she's planning her wedding so She will have an extra person to go dress shopping with I've waited to tell her until now as she's been busy with uni finals and dissertation stuff.both me and my cousin think she will be fine with it to.

I'm not going to tell my parents until I have to as their surprisingly old fashioned and set in their ways in lot's of things but I live in hope.

I'm glad things worked out well for you with your family to I've done something similar by moving to the other side of the country UK so it's not that far but it's a clean break to.

I think our little trip is going to be amazing to plenty of girly things to do to she needs a dress and shoes I need a proper smart outfit to kick start my wardrobe into ladylike rather than man drab you know.

Thank you for the nice reply Sarah

Jess xXx

[Cindy]

That's great news Jess,

I think we often forget that many people can love and respect us. Why not we are just normal human beings. I've just come back from a TG group meeting where two sets of parents proudly sat at dinner with their new daughters. They engaged in conversation with everyone and were totally accepting and loving of their daughters. Whose eyes were glistening all through dinner.

There is hope and it's called love.

BTW send cousin some flowers?

Hugs

Cindy

[Sarah B]

Hi Jessica Rose

You are more than welcome.  I also was 30 when I finally changed, but unlike you had no one to help me.

Looks like you have fun times ahead of you.  I also agree with Cindy James, send her a bunch of flowers, or something she really likes.

Take care.

Kind regards
Sarah B

[cynthialee]

I am one of the lucky few who have an accepting family and from where I sit...having family suport makes transition so much easier.
They seem intent on giving me the standard issue programing they give to the girl children. Especially my brother. He has alot of gender rules for me now. LOL
I just accept it as love and know that they just want me to be a good girl and not shame the family.

[jessica rose]

It's funny you mention getting her a gift Sarah and Cindy we did see a really nice clock with picture frames around it that she liked I believe the words were "that clock is SOOooooo cute" so there may be a trip back down to Swansea to pick it up to say thank you for being great about everything.

I also really hope everyone in my family is as supportive as your family has been Cynthia that would be great for me. You wouldn't happen to have a copy of those Gender rules your brother gave you would you? lol I just want to be a really nice lady one that my family can be proud of to.

I think your right Sarah I am fortunate to have at least one person within the family so supportive of my transition.

Jess xXx