I know you hate these vain threads... But can I pass?

[pebbles]

I'm not full time yet nor do I go out presenting as a female yet not done so for a long time and never with pepole who know me but I'm getting the itch to go... But I still see lots of male in the mirror which puts me off the idea, Friends and family and associates certainly don't see me as female not been mistaken for female for a long time.

There are two things that in my mind obstruct my passing... 1st Facial hair but I'm already railing on that Lasers needles and HRT I'm also training my voice during this time so I should have least some of that be ready sorta by mid to late summer which I can wait around for.

The other things that really upsets me these days is my forehead... I think I have alot of brow bossing.
My situation is such that I can't afford or save up money for FFS I also would find it hard to find a 1 month recuperation period Things in my life are implacable with there time demands. It'd be more than a year and a half. ;_;

So! I'm going to ask for an outside opinion because I might have a negative affirmation bias firstly is my face as bad and unpassable as I think it is in my mind? ... is it just my forehead that's a problem? please be honest. And please feel welcome to help with other suggestions to help with my presentation.

This is how I look today and how my friends and family have see me.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v63/Darkphantom/items/image_sb_1.jpg

This is my face in profile so you can see the nasty bulge
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v63/Darkphantom/items/image_sb_3.jpg

concealing the forehead stopgap options!
1: Wear my glasses... This is what I used to do when I was younger and cross-dressed and skipped out into the night alone presenting as a female I was often seen as female back then despite a few unpleasant comments.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v63/Darkphantom/meeex2.png
I was about 17 here and still making a few silly experimental errors Black bra white top tsktsktsk (but it's alot better than my first forays oh man those are funny maybe I will show you another time. )

2: Cut myself a fringe... I haven't had one of these for a VERY very long time... but I have found a rather embarrassing photo of a depressed 15 year old who's 12 year old sister jumped out with her new digital camera for a snap of her blue big brother.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v63/Darkphantom/items/Blue2.jpg

Do you think such a fringe would suit me now or would it look terrible?... It draws alot of attention to your nose and jaw... Which in my mind are... Okay not brilliant but I guess they are better than the forehead.

[Kay]

Hi Pebbles,
.
I can definately see the changes from your earlier pics.
.
I think you just need to give HRT a bit more time.  It hasn't been that long yet.  See where it takes you.
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I think you're right about the brow bossing being your most challenging feature.  It's not a deal-breaker, you just have to accentuate all the rest of the positives.  Other than the bossing, I don't think there are any other aspects of your face that are very masculine.
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Regarding the hair, I'd be careful about the fringe.  It's probably best to get a hair cut that accentuates the rest of your face...draw out the positives  (generally with an oval face, I think they say to accentuate the cheeks and chin)  Fringe at a certain length could either draw attention to that feature, or make it look like you're trying to cover it up if you overdo it by making it too thick.  I wish I had better advice for you on that...my hair is pretty much in the same boat...needs a bit more shape to it.
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In general, you appear pretty androgynous.  Long hair...but not cut into a particularly feminine style.  Clean brows, but no definite shape.  Dark clothing that's a bit hard to make out in the pics, but if I had to say which way the clothing leaned, I'd have to say toward the masculine.  Nothing that loudly screams "man"...but it doesn't really say "woman" yet either.  In all honesty, all-together, it reads as "androgynous boy."  Sorry, I don't mean to offend.
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On the up-side, it's not a matter of one thing, or a matter of a feature that is impossible to overcome...it's a lot of subtle things that add up to that perception.  (HRT will gradually help over time as well.)  And all of those subtle things can be worked with.  In other words, you've got a good canvas to start from...why don't you try your hand at painting a little? 
.
Good luck,
.
Kay

[casorce]

Thick rimmed girl's 'emo' glasses would help conceal and draw attention away from your forehead. They'd also break up the length of your face.
Smile! Men are typically the ones who walk around with poker-faces. Find a lipstick or gloss that suits your colouring to help accentuate your mouth, as it's a very feminine feature on you. Smiling or simply keeping your lips parted will shorten the gap between your upper lip and nose, which is a male marker (the distance is greater on men).
Lastly, get your hair styled. Speak to a friendly hairdresser and explain your situation. You'll be amazed at how accommodating some people will be. Espcially the more alternative salons.

[V M]

Other than the obvious facial hair shadow, you look like a typical Calif. beach girl that needs to either get more sun or do her hair again.

Other than that, you look great

Sorry, no sugar coating... Just being honest because I see potential there

[Katelyn-W]

Where's the make-up!? 

Even just a little bit can go a long way, trust me on this one . My "simple look" is eye-liner along/near the tear-ducts (above the lower eye-lashes, use an eye-liner pencil), some people don't like getting that close to their eye though. Light amounts of concealer. I also use lip stain, very light stuff and it lasts a long time. I'm terrible (or maybe just impatient ) at using eye-shadow, and liquid eye-liner, the above stuff is really easy.

Otherwise I'm gonna have to agree Kay, you look pretty androgynous. Which isn't necessarily bad, could be a lot worse . I think with some effort you can make a big difference in making yourself "passable".

[Dana Lane]

I agree...try a little makeup.

Is your goal to actually pass or do you just want to be able to actually express yourself in public? I don't totally pass but need to be myself so I present as female 24/7. I also live in a very diverse setting which helps.

[rejennyrated]

If it bothers you a brow ridge reduction may be an option in the future... but yes in general you do "pass" - and a fair bit better than some that I've seen. Personally I don't think the "bulge" is that noticable unless you are really looking for it. Like others said, specs may also be a way to conceal it too.

Electrolysis should be your first concern for now. If you remove any traces of facial hair you will do just fine as you are.

Over all I would say you do very well.

[lilacwoman]

you're fine as you are...forget brow ops...and get out to your local clubs where other crossgnederd people go to see how well you stack up against all the others...family and friends will tell you the worst cos they don't want you to transition.


and don't fall into same trap as lots of others:
you look in a mirror and see the male bits...look at the female bits instead.

get the hair cut to a nice jaw length so it won't look so stringy and male.

[MsFierce]

I think you look fine. You should get a eyebrow wax and shape your eyebrows to look more feminine that would really shape your face. Your hair looks good, I don't think you need FFS. give the HRT some time to work.

[rejennyrated]

Yeah - just to clarify - I certainly did not mean to imply that I think you need any FFS - because I don't.

Like I said I've seen far far worse. I was just mentioning it, because ultimately some people do get hung up on something which no one else notices but which to them becomes a huge sticking point... and if that becomes the case for you then the option exists, but no one should criticise you either way.

If you are asking my opinion I wouldn't bother. Just do the electrolysis get a nice hair style and leave it at that.

[cynthialee]

My mother has more brow bossing than you.
Get rid of that beard shadow and you will pass if you want to, easy.

[pebbles]

Thank you everyone for what I feel are extremely kind words more than I deserve I think, I will think about what you all said I promise I won't bother you with my vain narcissism again, It's nice to hear that at least some don't think it's a huge problem.

The NHS gave me a Pamphlet about begin trans and it said (carry yourself with confidence then your already 50% done with passing)

I know my facial hair is a problem it was abnormally thick I've not even seen another male with as much as I had when I started... what I've got now is less than 40% of what it was when I started it basically regenerated itself all the way back even from electro+IPL after I nearly cleared it last November which was mortifying... hopefully now with HRT+Laser+Electro it will stay dead this time,
It WILL die even if I have to kill it 13 times like a time lord it will die.

I may get layers put into my hair to give it some shape, I need to get the ends trimmed definitely while i'm at it. I might get a change of colour too but I will have to think about what I want in that regards... I don't have to wash it anywhere near as much with no T greasing it up, so I have many more options
But I'm not going to cut it that short however lilac I'm happy with it longer

I'm not a huge fan of makeup and I'm very bad at applying it I make such a mess of myself, but your right alittle couldn't hurt from time to time.
Good suggestion with the eyebrows but my brows sit quite low and they conceal a scar... although I pluck them alittle I'm nervous about messing up there shape so I'm doing that slowly

And I need new glasses anyway I broke my last pair months ago (sat on them) I will have a look at thick rimmed glasses, see if I can live with them. it maybe abit... Jo90 ubergeek for me to live with day to day but yeah I think it would help... If nothing then I can read at a distance again and I get the psychological sensation of wearing something that I feel hides my deficiency.

[MsFierce]

I may get layers put into my hair to give it some shape, I need to get the ends trimmed definitely while i'm at it. I might get a change of colour too but I will have to think about what I want in that regards... I don't have to wash it anywhere near as much with no T greasing it up, so I have many more options
But I'm not going to cut it that short however lilac I'm happy with it longer

I'm not a huge fan of makeup and I'm very bad at applying it I make such a mess of myself, but your right alittle couldn't hurt from time to time.
Good suggestion with the eyebrows but my brows sit quite low and they conceal a scar... although I pluck them alittle I'm nervous about messing up there shape so I'm doing that slowly

Yes, your hair now is very like 70's groupie kinda hair do . You need some color and some bounce & volume in your hair.

Def re think the eyebrows a lil shape would really change your face.

Oh and makeup should be your new friend . you need a lil color in your face. that and it would hide the shadows.

[BunnyBee]

Most of the advice has been very good.  I want to reiterate one very important thing: SMILE!  It really does help.  I believe this is one of the reasons people stop passing as frequently when they don't feel good about themselves.  And the bonus is- smiling makes you feel happy, even if you are just faking it at first . 

http://www.howstuffworks.com/human-nature/emotions/happiness/science/smiling-happy.htm/printable

In fact, it would take a very long list to describe all the benefits you will realize in your life from simply squeezing a few muscles in your face.

[placeholdername]

I'd say the only thing that pops out to me is the chin area (as well as slight remnants of facial hair but you're working on that I gather).  Not sure what you can do about the chin thing other than surgery at some point.  Maybe multi-stage FFS is a better plan for you than trying to get it done all at once?

Also, someone else commented about 'thick rimmed emo girl glasses' and while I don't think you need to go quite that far, dark, not-thin-rimmed glasses really do help.  I got 'new' glasses a couple months ago, I think they're technically men's glasses but I picked ones as androgynous as I could find, with dark brown rims maybe 1/8 inch thick, and they do wonders do obscure the whole prominent brow/nose thing that I have on my face for now .

Hair looks great by the way .

[BunnyBee]

Let hormones do their thing for a while before even considering FFS.  HRT has noticeably changed the structure of my face, and you do have the advantage of youth over me .

YMMV of course, but it would be wise to wait and see how it actually affects you first.

[Nigella]

Let hormones do their thing for a while before even considering FFS.  HRT has noticeably changed the structure of my face, and you do have the advantage of youth over me .

YMMV of course, but it would be wise to wait and see how it actually affects you first.

Yeah, I totally agree, wait for a while and a while means years, 2-3. I've been on HRT for two years and its only this past month that I feel confident in my looks and see a female face (others might not agree but so what). I thought I needed ffs two/three years ago, now I'm not so sure, but perhaps still some nose work. So in answer, a little makeup and a whole lot of time.

Stardust

[V M]

I would have to agree with the "Let HRT take it's coarse" school of thought

You are rather well along and have some rather nice features

Okay, you need another round of electro and a bit of lipstick and eye liner wouldn't hurt

But I would go with the "frameless" clear glasses. Much more up to date... Yes I wear glasses also

And no more beating yourself up... There is nothing vain or narcissistic about asking for an opinion and/or a constructive critique

            {{{HUGS}}}

[Megan]

You pass kind of well, but more of the Velma type from Scooby Doo.

[Autumn]

Smiling poofs your cheeks
Fatter cheeks = girl
Smiling makes you pass. You don't even have to show teeth.

(To help lessen the blow of having to smile.)

I've sort of retrained the muscle in my face to keep a more persistent smile going... it doesn't really look like a smile in the mouth but it makes my cheeks more defined.