Im desperate for advice....Why do I

[StaceyBean]

Insist on reading this that aren't meant for me to read??

Like, okay I went on myspace for the first time in forever, and noticed my wonderful boyfriend had a blog that was titled if you ever decide to stalk my blog again...and me thinking it was for me tried to read it, except it was set as private..So curiosity sets in..and I ask him, can i read it, he obliges...

I read it and it basically confesses that he loves me, and cares about me, but he wants to be with this other girl. A girl who i continually am jealous of because I KNOW he likes her, it just kinda confirmed the fact that he's with me because I'm here, and shes not. Lovely. I mean it was back in February...buut I feel like, if you feel that way, why be with me? Like it just kinda puts everything into perspective..It just sucks. Life just sucks lately...

I could really use some advice...do i let it go because it was in Feb? or Do I just break it off with him completely Im not saying I'll follow through on the advice given but I could really use some different perspectives..

[cynthialee]

I am of two minds.
1. He loves and trusts you enough to share even his thoughts that will hurt you.
2. You are second choice, a consolation prize.

I would sugest a serious heart to heart and confront your relationship issues togather.

[no_id]

First off: ouch - I can imagine the emotional uppercut on that one.
Now second; the advice partial.
Well, I guess the 'he let you read it' part can go two ways:
1. He trusts you enough yadda-yadda.
2. It creates a nice opening.

As for your question whether you should let go of it or throw some bricks, I'd say neither. I'm actually with cynth on this one; you gotta sit down and go over it. Obviously your man wasn't head-on in the past and you ought to figure out what his position is right now. Only then can you decide on what's best for you even though 'doubt' can be a serious and acceptable motivator.
Talk, that's all you can do to clear up the dust and see things clear.

[jesse]

or and im not trying to be mean hes a relationship coward and this is his way of telling you he wants to breakup and hopes it will piss you off enough that you will do it and releave him of the pressure of owning the breakup.
jessica

[Teknoir]

Are you sure the thoughts expressed in that blog post are his current thoughts?

You two need to talk, and figure out what both of you want.

If those are his current thoughts, you may have to consider that your relationship may be coming to an end. And honestly, if he's looking elsewhere it may be for the best.

Keep an open mind that those may not be his current thoughts, as it sounds like he only showed them to you after you asked to see them (they were not publicly posted). He may have been using the blog as a private journal in which to work some things out (yes, men do that ).

[Just Kate]

or and im not trying to be mean hes a relationship coward and this is his way of telling you he wants to breakup and hopes it will piss you off enough that you will do it and releave him of the pressure of owning the breakup.
jessica

I'm kinda with Jesse on this one.  It feels like he might be saying, "ok, I'm putting it out there - I like her.  Now that you know this, convince me you are worth it."

I could be wrong of course, I've only read 6 lines of text related to your entire relationship.  Either way, I'd evaluate what the relationship meant to me, and if it isn't going the direction you like, you have the right to change it/come to a compromise.