"Ciao Peoples of Susan's Place" LaPapito here, Und here is my story...
"I am the proud (mother, yes biological-mother) of two beautiful and gifted children (a female-child und a male-child)...
Like sooo many of us here...I knew what my direction of life was going to be probably before I knew I was to be born...fortunately for me, I grew up in a very loving, un-prejudice home and was able to mold myself into who I am today...there were a few detours (two of them)
I tried the marriage-thing of life und while it was a good one for me @ that time it was not for me...you see while I may have wanted children, I didn't want to be the mother...I wanted to be the father, but I knew that as a father I could not have children...Ooh sure I could have adopted, but for me, that would not have been tha' same thing, und so, I got to thinking; as a FE-male, I am quite capable of having me own children und whom better to be a candidate for this position but me-self...
So my then husband, the "proverbial" man became my host und I became a parent...after the birth of my son (the youngest) + two yrs, my husband and I went our separate ways...the main reason "I was too much of an Alpha-fe-Male" fer him...
Finally, I was free of bras...as I flung mine across tha' room in celebration of freedom und absolute delite...after our split, I and my two small children then 5 & 2yrs old, left the United States (because of military duty) und lived happily in Europe for almost the entire stench of the 90's...I've never hid who I was from my children, und I always (let me say this again) always practice and preached what I believed in to my children...I believed in diversity, freedom of speech und thought, tolerance und that it is ok/ to be a little prejudice to a certain point (let's face it we ALL don't agree ALL the damn time)...but one thing I didn't do around them when they were very young was entertain...and I mean affectionately here (with a person of the same sex)...but this was for personal reasons, it had nothing to do with me wanting to hide my sexual preference from my children...understand that. In our home my children were allowed to voice their opinions and express how they felt about anything...und when the discussions were over, we would clear the air on things they didn't quite fully understand...when I made the decision to fully transmogrify my children were 11 & 8yrs old und I took in a FE-male lover for tha' very first time to see how they would react...my son was jealous because he felt I was spending too much time with my Ladyfriend and not with him...und my daughter was a little jealous because she felt my Ladyfriend was moving in on her turf...typical children reaction...
Needless to say, this was neither tha' case for either of them...first off no-one was moving in on their "turf" und second I would never put anyone before my children. The point I am trying to make is this...sometimes as adults WE have away of pushing, stuffing, und sometimes rushing into things without first thinking about our relationships with our children...I didn't say family I said children...it would have been wrong for me to expect my children to digest my lively hood if I did not explain it to them when they were young und old enough to understand (this without a doubt would have caused some type of rift later on in life), but because they were familiar with my life style und because "their" house was a "safe-haven" for them, they were not at all threaten nor did they feel threatened by any of my relationships that I might have expedited into their young stages of life. I believed in integration...and while it may be a slow process for some...in the end, it's well worth it...my kids don't judge me and my status of living, they judge me on whether I spend equal time with them und everyone here lives in harmony.
If their friends are uncomfortable around our household...then they were no-longer friends with them ... I use to think that my "->-bleeped-<-" would be a threat to them, und was I being selfish...but, it's a good thing to note here (because as they have both interjected on many occasions), we ARE a family und family comes first, und if they can't accept you (meaning me) then they don't accept us as friends... so far I haven't lost any of their friends...and now 10 spoiled-yrs later, my two are 21 & 18yrs old...How about that...?
I truly believe that it's the timing und whether or not you allow family members to interfere with you, your child(ren), your life-style, und your decision to transmogrify. I didn't allow my family to interfere with my life, simply because they were my children, und secondly, because IT is my life, und if they are allowed to live their life the way they deem fit, then don't worry about the way I live mine.
The number one cause of confusion, feeling disassociation etc. among LGT's is FAMILY members...you may feel as though you don't want to lose these members or sever their relationship, but honestly let's see a show of hands of those who have heard these very words, "keep this life up and you will be dis-inherited, dis-owned, dis-dis" etc etc etc...and yet, these very same family members that are willing to dis-own you, are the same ones that are living their life the way they same fit...whether it's a miserable one or not!
Confusion in the mind is only there because WE as a Transgender(ed) whole allow for IT [confusion] to be put there...People WE know who WE are...it's those who think they know whom we should be, who try to tell us whom we ARE not...!!!
Thank you fer your support und time...
