Well...*whew* That's done.

[Sevan]

Hey all
I just came out to all of my immediate family that I'm an androgyne and I'm on T.
I did it via email which....feels kinda wussy of me but I was able to edit, include links and get all my thoughts out without being interupted (as would have happened on the phone..) Now....to wait for a response.

[confused]

nice i think emails are more informative too because like you said you'd be interrupted
good luck

[arbon]

Now....to wait for a response.

That is the real hard part.

I sent my brother an email and waited, waited, waited... His lack of response drove me crazy. After a few days I called. Turned out the email I had sent went into his junk mail folder, so just ended up talking to him about it anyway.

[confused]

That is the real hard part.

I sent my brother an email and waited, waited, waited... His lack of response drove me crazy. After a few days I called. Turned out the email I had sent went into his junk mail folder, so just ended up talking to him about it anyway.

that's destiny then hehe  ,  hope it went fine

[Pica Pica]

I imagine they'll be pleased at first, then less pleased...seems to be the pattern.

[Vanessa_yhvh]

Best of luck!

I told my sister on the phone, because I was calling her to make sure she hadn't done anything to p*** off Mom that day before I told her face to face.

[Eva Marie]

I hope that your family is understanding and accepting of your situation, sevan 

[Jaden]

Congrats on telling your family. I know it's hard to wait for that response. *huggles*

[Shana A]

Congrats on telling them!

Z

[no_id]

Hey Sevan, cool deal that you took up the coming out drums. If you will; let us know what kind of reactions you got. Best of luck.

[Sevan]

Hey, Thanks all!

Well today's Tues morning and I sent out the email on Friday evening. Still no word from my parents however my sister called me last night. She started out saying she wasn't going to kick me out of her life and she'd always love me but she had ALOT of questions. I told her I was more than willing to answer them best I could. She didn't seem happy with any of my answers and grew more and more uncomfortable.

The big thing for both of my sisters is that they don't see why I'm changing my name since "I'm not changing my sex" and what they fail to see is that I AM transitioning, I DO see androgyn as a valid sex just like female and male and told her so but...she didn't seem to get it. *sigh*

We left off with "Well...what do I tell the kids?" my first thought was..."well how about the truth" but decided that wouldn't go over so well with her. I told her she knows her children better than I do and she should tell them whatever she thinks feels right. Blarg. This stuff's exausting...
Post Merge: May 04, 2010, 09:18:44 PM
Ok. I have two sisters. One is a lesbian (whom I shall call *ally* here forth) so I came out to her first shortly after I started T...so like..over a month ago (ish). My other sister and my parents found out via email written on Friday.

So ally has been talking to our other family members to feel them out and see how it's all going so I don't walk into landminds, or get my feeling un-necisarrily hurt by my parents or other sister's raw feelings. (I wear my heart on my sleeve and the idea that they disaprove or are angry with me...is just devistating) So she's been keeping me filled in but with a kind of...watered down version.

According to her...my parent's have seen the email, they read it, and they're not taking it well *sigh* I'm not at all suprised but that still sucks. She said "I don't think you'll be hearing from them for a while" ....that sucks.

The other issue that keeps coming up is that they don't understand my transition because they don't see it as "transitioning" because I'm not a man. So...then...what is taking hormones then!?!?! The fact that I don't intend on a surgery somehow means I'm less than? I'm just a freak not a transsexual? This just...this freakin sucks. I want to go on every talk show I can just to gain some validity for androgyns/third genders/gender queers. AH!!! This is so maddening that...ugh.

One thing I'm worried about that my sister asked me last night...she was asking all these questions about my intentions, my transition, ect...then out of no where she asked if my (now ex) best friend still talks to me. I responded that no..she doesn't talk to me anymore because of my transition. I found that odd. I'm worried she's looking around to see how other's are taking this so she can just ride whatever wave or trend is being set. I need to think about something else....*sigh*

[arbon]

According to her...my parent's have seen the email, they read it, and they're not taking it well  *sigh* I'm not at all suprised but that still sucks. She said "I don't think you'll be hearing from them for a while" ....that sucks.

I just don't understand parents that do that.

How can you turn your back on your own child?

I could never imagine doing that to my child for any reason.

[LordKAT]

I could never imagine doing that to my child for any reason.

I can.  Walk in their shoes and you may see things differently. I wouldn't for trans reasons tho.

[Kendall]

Congratz! I hope the best for you.

Sounds like it may take some time for them to know what they are feeling themselves. They thought of you one way their whole life, and hearing how you feel about yourself, may be the first time they ever considered such thing.

I am still working on things several years since first telling my family, so be patient...

[LordKAT]

Congratz! I hope the best for you.

Sounds like it may take some time for them to know what they are feeling themselves. They thought of you one way their whole life, and hearing how you feel about yourself, may be the first time they ever considered such thing.

I am still working on things several years since first telling my family, so be patient...

bout time you made an appearance. Where have you been?

[Sevan]

Well...my sister had said to not expect to hear from my parents for a while. Of which I took to mean that I wouldn't hear from them for a month or more (not honestly sure where I pulled that number from but it is what it is.)

I just got an email from my mom. It wasn't very pretty. She's angry. At least she's able to express that she's on a rollercoaster of emotions..and she's able to tell me she's angry rather than just lashing out. Though she did some of that too....

She also cut the email short rather than ranting for pages and pages...I take that to be a good thing as well.

Those little nuggest are all the good I can pull from it just now though....and honestly, it's a bit of a stretch to say those are "good things"....*sigh* We've got a long long way to go.

[Nicky]

Coming out is exhausting. Take care of yourself sweety.

Nicole.
xx

[Jaden]

*huggles Sevan*

[RebeccaFog]

Don't forget that time will even it all out one way or the other. So, if you feel frustrated or like walking away, just take a time out so you can keep your strength up.

[Sevan]

Thanks As it's mother's day weekend I'm taking a break from this email back and forth. I'm also trying to collect myself because I really don't know what to say. I know that I need to watch my words closely, speak from my truth and not place blame or use any "you" statements. Only "I" statements.

Quite right, this will take a while. As I come back with love, and refusing to back down...I fear this will escalate. I hope not...I don't want to fight with them, I don't want them to feel like they have to act out in attempts to get me to change...because that's not possible. I lived for other's for long enough. Now is my time. My time to be true to me.