Psychological disorders and Transition

[Laura91]

I can say with 100% certainty that all of the psychological (and other) problems that I ever had is caused by GID in one way or another. I had severe social anxiety until I was 30, I started using drugs/alcohol in my teens because the idea of continuing in the hell that was my natal puberty was too much to handle, so I had to numb my mind as much as I could. I ended up gaining a lot of weight during that same period because I couldn't go outside for a walk without the neighborhood boys wanting to beat me up because I was a "fag". Then I had to deal with an alcoholic father that constantly made horrible comments about me because I was getting fat. Not to mention the suicidal thoughts that began cropping up around age 10, 11 (and I still fight them today, but not as much as I did a year ago, but they still linger) So, if I was born in the right body I could have avoided all of that.

[Julie Marie]

As I emerged from denial and began to look at my life, I realized repressing my true self took its toll on me.  I've heard arguments from both sides (GID leads to other conditions - other conditions amplify GID). 

I'm not carrying a PhD after my name.  This is just simple logic.

Imagine living as a prisoner of war or in a concentration camp.  Your captors force you to do things against your will.  If you resist, there's a price to pay.

We learn very early on we either conform or pay the price for not conforming.  The price one pays is related to how the taboo is viewed by the general public and how those around you buy into the stigma.  The transgender stigma is substantial.  I can't think of many taboos worse than being TG.  So the price we pay for being ourselves is high.

A young TG knows early on his/her family won't be accepting.  Some families simply throw the kids out on the street.  That's pretty scary for a kid.  So you do your best to conform.

We know ex-POWs suffer PTSD.  So do many people who are placed in situations they find abhorrent.  So it's perfectly understandable if a TG who has lived a repressed life develops other mentally related conditions.

For me, I think repressing your true self can be very damaging to the individual.  And I seriously doubt there's much, if any, situations where an existing mental disorder leads one to a transgender condition.

[FLAddisonsHell]

Indeed your so right,  I like your analogies... A quote from transgendercare.com

Becoming one's True Self — This is the last but unfortunately least experienced part of transitioning. This is the stage when that little girl trapped inside an artificial male persona in order to fit in, breaks free, grows up and has her own life — often with markedly different values, temperament and interests.

"It has been my observation that the female subjective self needs little help in growing up and developing if the overpowering weight of the male persona is removed from it. The individual has spent years, decades developing, reinforcing and living in this male role. Dismantling the male persona takes a great deal of time, effort and outside help."

after I read this I began to feel like a survivor of Hiroshima.

[V M]

For me the GID was there early on in childhood. Not being able to fully express myself and being expected to perform as someone I did not wish to be had both negative and positive effects in my opinion

True, I learned some valuable skills that may have been a benefit to myself and others at various times, but I think maybe I would have preferred a bit less injurious lifestyle

Transitioning much earlier in life would have saved me allot of trouble and heartache

But hey, we play the cards we're dealt the best we can... Then it's our turn to deal with whatever we're dealt in life

So keep movin' forward

[kyle_lawrence]

Any GID I probably experienced was always masked by a physical 'disability' that had me in and out of hospitals and doctors offices through my teen years.  I have scoliosis, and had to have a full spinal fusion with titanium rods, with a couple revision surgeries over the next few years.  I was too pre occupied with being "the girl with the messed up back" and pretty much re learning how to use my body, to notice any trans type thoughts for years. 

I was finally able to deal with my scoliosis and move past it, when the depression got worse, and I started in on drugs and alcohol, and self harm.  My college room mate finally convinced me to go  to a therapist, where I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder.  No surprise therapy didn't help at all. They tried to put me on drugs, and I refused to talk to my therapist after a while.

Jump through the process that everyone knows, and I'm finally happy with myself. drugs and alcohol are strictly a weekend social thing, I've been depressed way less, and havn't hurt myself in years.  Its amazing what a binder and mens dress shirt can do for my mental health.