relationships and transitioning

[sean911]

I have just recently had a break up with a girl, who was very accepting of My transition. I am not sure if someone comes along during My transition whether to accept or to put off relationships until I have settled down.

[tekla]

It seems to be something that is very hard on relationships.

[kyril]

I can tell you that you definitely should not enter into a serious relationship as your birth sex, or with someone who identifies as primarily attracted to your birth sex. Female partners of both trans men and trans women seem to adjust much better than male partners on the whole, but it's still not easy or fair for them, and the resulting relationship is unlikely to resemble the original.

But there's no reason you should avoid casual dating. And if you have the chance to enter into a relationship with someone who sees you as your target sex (and for whom being attracted to your target sex is consistent with their identity), there's no reason not to go for it if you want to.

[FairyGirl]

I can tell you that you definitely should not enter into a serious relationship as your birth sex, or with someone who identifies as primarily attracted to your birth sex. Female partners of both trans men and trans women seem to adjust much better than male partners on the whole, but it's still not easy or fair for them, and the resulting relationship is unlikely to resemble the original.

Even if the person you're already in a relationship with is your best friend who completely supports you, transitioning means changing your birth sex and there is no guarantee that person is going to still be physically attracted to you, or you to that person, even if you still love each other deeply on an emotional level. ( <-- voice of experience.) These things happen sometimes, and sometimes they don't. But Kyril is correct about entering into a serious relationship during transition (and he's totally cute and I wish he liked girls lol)

[kyril]

Aw, FairyGirl, you're really sweet and gorgeous, too, by the way.

[sean911]

thankyou so much for your responses Kyril and Sweetgirl. You both have confirmed what I thought too.