This isn't technically a coming out letter, but it shares enough issues with that process that I felt this was the proper place to put this.
So, a little background on this. My dad has known about my dealing with this gender issue for a couple of years now, well actually he knew about it long before that, but he's known that I finally began dealing with it in earnest, getting treatment, etc. for that long. His approach to knowing this has been ...total radio silence... as I've dealt with things, and since I was pretty sure I knew what his reaction would be, I was totally fine with that. The last thing I needed while I was entrenched in the most difficult, but important, year of my life was a "Wormtongue" in my ear, filling it with words of discouragement. Such a thing could well have been the difference in my being alive today and not. He is in Atlanta, on the other side of the country from me now, so it has not been hard keeping things mostly invisible to him as I have gone through the process.
Once I felt I had gained the strength to deal with his reaction, I send him a hand-written letter that basically just got the point across that this gender transition thing is for reals and we should deal with it. His response, which came a couple months ago, was pretty much exactly what I expected. A lot of God this and God that, the gist being: "please carefully consider how this choice will affect all the people that love you, please don't drive me away from you, and I implore you to patiently wait for God's help before you do anything that will get you sent to hell."
My response to his email is quoted below. I would like to hear your reaction, because I worry about making it too strong. My intention is not to drive him away with an angry or even overly emotional response, even though I have been wrecked emotionally since receiving his email. His relationship means a lot to me and I'm not trying to win an argument with him, I just hope to retain our relationship even though
I is changing sexes 
.
I chose not to get into my rather agnostic beliefs about God for this very reason, there is no point in opening that can of worms. For y'all, just insert "the Universe" wherever you see me talking about God
.
Okay, my letter:
Quote
(I didn't want to leave the letter part up forever. Thanks for all the well-wishes and advice!)
