FFS - Who Needs It, Who Wants It...

[Julie Marie]

There's an Internet forum dedicated solely to FFS.  Naturally, almost everyone there is planning surgery, recovering from surgery or enjoying the results of the surgery.  But I rarely hear of anyone here having had FFS or even thinking about it.  I was just wondering how many ladies have thought about this.  There is a belief out there that FFS is just as important as SRS, maybe even more so. 

Just curious why it's so rarely discussed here.

Julie

[Robyn]

Dr O's talks aside, I think it is rarely needed, particularly for us older gals.

If I had had FFS, I think I'd still have had my SRS first.  Then, if there had still been funding, go for the $40K or so for the face.

In your case, Julie, as I've mentioned several times:  I don't see where it could make you any prettier or any more feminine.

I had a traech shave and would like to have a nose job and the bags under my eyes removed.  Probably won't ever do so.  A Maui timeshare might bring more pleasure in the long run.  <grins>

Robyn

[tinkerbell]

tinkerbell

[cindianna_jones]

I never thought about it much. It never made it to my priorities list.  I never had the trach shave and I should have done that. It does poke out.  I suppose that if I could have done a little better finanancially back then, I may have considered it. I have thought about it recently only after coming here last summer.  Until then, I really didn't worry about it.

But now, my mind is racked every night.  OMG, I have an Adam's apple now.  I find myself wearing my shirts buttoned up high, or hiding it with my hands.

Oh.. just writing this message has made me so miserable.

hehehehe.

Cindi

[Ricki]

Well if i was gonna transition i would want the works, i fear it still would not be enough?
I know I'm a miserable sight, but I'm full of love you just cannot see it!
cyber bunnies
ricki

[tinkerbell]

But now, my mind is racked every night.  OMG, I have an Adam's apple now.  I find myself wearing my shirts buttoned up high, or hiding it with my hands.

Oh.. just writing this message has made me so miserable.

hehehehe.

Cindi

LOL...you are so funny!    ....and don't forget about all those wool scarves you wear in the summer time to cover your neck...

tinkerbell

[LynnER]

Ive considered FFS, and up untill going fulltime it was my number one priority... not because I really need it to pass (well, yeah the trach shave is a must) but because I NEED it for me....  I want to have my jaw/chin rounded/softened... but overall I want the same overall shape and angle.  I want the brow bossing, maby narrow my nose a bit sence Im doing everything else, and maby they can correct my sinus problem while there at it LoL....

Sence going fulltime Ive found FFS to be alittle less improtant, though its still on the priority list... but now if I could have the final surgery tomarrow or FFS tomarrow... Id go for the final 

[Elizabeth]

Hey Julie,

I am a minimalist. I want to do the absolute minimum I can. What I mean by that is, the minimum to abate my gender dysphoria. I am not particularly impressed with the results of FFS. I also beleive I already have a very feminine looking face, other than a big nose. However after looking at pics of my mother, I realize she has a big nose too.



You be the judge. This is my mother and me in a blond wig. I think we look very similar.

Love always,
Elizabeth

[Melissa]

For me, I feel it would be a nicety.  Not something absolutely crucial to fully live life as a woman, but I think I would probably do it to improve my appearance.  At this particular point in time however (not due to finances), if I was offered FFS, I would probably decline because of some recent things.  Since talking about my looks seems to make me come off as vain and conceded, I will decline to state why.

[Sandy]

For me, it would be more important than SRS.

Face it girls (sorry), your face is the first thing society sees.  The SRS only addresses something polite society should *never* see. 

If it weren't for the fact that you need SRS to get your primary documentation changed I wouldn't do it.  Or at least only if I ended up in a relationship that I felt would be made stronger by giving me the ability to have intercourse with the proper equipment.

I want society to accept me as the woman I know I am.  FFS would help that.  SRS, for me, only confirms my belief.

And to my mind, were society more sanely put together, FFS would be the operation(s) to require two letters and RLT. 

The way it is now you can look as feminine as you want and all you need is your checkbook.  The FFS surgeries are as just as irreversible as SRS.  Yet one minor corrective surgery between the legs and you have to ask permission of gatekeepers who probably haven't experienced the anguish we have.  You must say the proper words and pass the proper tests because they, the males who have the power and skill, couldn't concieve of anyone wanting to mutilate their genitalia.  So anyone who does wants to is obviously deranged and needs to prove that they really, Really, REALLY want to!

Sorry ladies, I'll get off that soapbox now.  This is obviously something that everyone has heard before or thought it themselves, but every now and then I need to vent...

-Sandy (the timid and unopinionated)

[tinkerbell]

The way it is now you can look as feminine as you want and all you need is your checkbook. 

Your checkbook but most importantly money in your checking account....


tinkerbell

[Refugee]

I think FFS is a mixed bag.  I do believe many people can benefit from it, I also believe many more people that don't need it or only minimally benefit from it are oversold on it.  Lastly, as much as I'm sure Dr.  O is a miracle worker, any surgeon can do a nose job and many of the other procedures Dr.  O charges 10x for.

If anything, I don't blame him, he's merely charging what the market is willing to pay and offering services his customers obviously want.  If anything he's a great salesman, most plastic surgeons are.

FFS, like SRS, is a vehicle to passing not the only means of it.

[Julie Marie]

There's a FFS surgeon not even 20 minutes away from my house who is described as an artist.  In comparing him to a very popular FFS surgeon (Dr.X) she said Dr X will make you passable, Dr Y will make you beautiful.  That has really got me thinking.  Thank you Robyn for the kind words but I have been read before just because of my face.  I can't change my bone structure.  I'll forever battle my deep voice but if I had a decidely feminine face it would sure make life easier.  And if it was beautiful it might open some doors for me that would normally be closed.

A lot of the girls here look to me like natural women but I'm seeing a 2D picture that most likely is the best one they can find.  That's what I do.  You'll never see a bad picture of me.  Why would I want to put my worst foot forward?  Kassandra has seen me in the flesh and if she was totally honest she'd probably tell you FFS would make a huge difference.  And you don't have to spend $40-50K to get that look.  A friend did a comparison between the famous Dr X and Dr Y and found Dr Y to be half the cost of Dr X.  And he's less invasive so there's a shorter healing time.

People will read your face first and they will do it in a couple of seconds.

Julie
 
   

[cindianna_jones]

Your checkbook but most importantly money in your checking account....

tinkerbell

Now wait a minute... I must have lots of money left in that account.  I still have a whole box of blank checks! 

Cindi

[Melissa]

There's a FFS surgeon not even 20 minutes away from my house who is described as an artist.  In comparing him to a very popular FFS surgeon (Dr.X) she said Dr X will make you passable, Dr Y will make you beautiful.  That has really got me thinking.  Thank you Robyn for the kind words but I have been read before just because of my face.  I can't change my bone structure.  I'll forever battle my deep voice but if I had a decidely feminine face it would sure make life easier.  And if it was beautiful it might open some doors for me that would normally be closed.

A lot of the girls here look to me like natural women but I'm seeing a 2D picture that most likely is the best one they can find.  That's what I do.  You'll never see a bad picture of me.  Why would I want to put my worst foot forward?  Kassandra has seen me in the flesh and if she was totally honest she'd probably tell you FFS would make a huge difference.  And you don't have to spend $40-50K to get that look.  A friend did a comparison between the famous Dr X and Dr Y and found Dr Y to be half the cost of Dr X.  And he's less invasive so there's a shorter healing time.

People will read your face first and they will do it in a couple of seconds.

Julie

Ok, I figured out who Dr. X and Dr. Y are and I would have to definitely agree with you in terms of results.  That's also great to know he is half the cost of Dr. X.

Melissa

[Kate]

There's a FFS surgeon not even 20 minutes away from my house who is described as an artist.  In comparing him to a very popular FFS surgeon (Dr.X) she said Dr X will make you passable, Dr Y will make you beautiful.

OOoo, I'm jealous. Doc Y (if I'm guessing this right) is either a flight or 12 hour drive for me. I did a telephone consult with him a ways back, and he seemed to genuinely care and listen to my concerns without imposing his own views. He also patiently answered my zillions of questions, which I very much appreciated.

The only thing I didn't like was his emphasis on beauty during his initial sales pitch. Sure, I'd like to be pretty, but I *need* to be passable - or at least I used to think so. I dunno, I'm beginning to relax a bit on my "I'll either pass or kill myself!" melodrama as I grow into this.

Do I need it though? I don't know, we'll have to wait and see what HRT does. I swear there's no way I'll ever pass without FFS, and yet my wife and therapist laugh hysterically whenever I say that, so... who knows? We tend to each be our own worst critics.

In any case, FFS would be at *least* a year or more in the future for me, so in the meantime I'm just casually doing my research, doing the consults, comparing techniques, etc. I'm hopeful that I'm just wasting my time

[Melissa]

I swear there's no way I'll ever pass without FFS, and yet my wife and therapist laugh hysterically whenever I say that, so... who knows? We tend to each be our own worst critics.

Yep.  Besides, I thought you already did get ma'amed in the supermarket.   I think a lot of passing is accepting many of the features we may consider "male" and realizing they can be female as well.  A lot of it is self-acceptance.  I'll just say that I used to be like that and think I would need major FFS and now I have almost completely accepted how I look and am currently not considering FFS.  The times I do is when I feel insecure.

Melissa

[DawnL]

I needed it, I've had it and it has been nothing short of a miracle for me.  I went from barely
passable to fully female after undergoing the full suite of procedures and I wouldn't hesitate
to do it again.  It was quite simply the best money I have ever spent.  I went to Dr Zukowski
in Chicago (Julie's Dr Y) and I think he is the best.  I had a Neanderthal brow-ridge that he
reduced to a flat feminine profile.  Hormones will do a lot but they will not change the brow-ridge
and the lower flat eyebrow profile that most men have.  If you don't need it, I think that's wonderful
but if seamless passing and stealth are part of your future I don't know how you can not consider
these procedures (other than the cost).  Regrettably, I am no longer comfortable posting a pre-op
photo of myself so I am unable to provide photographic evidence of my metamorphosis.  Kate has
seen them so she can comment if she wishes.

Dawn

[Kate]

Regrettably, I am no longer comfortable posting a pre-op
photo of myself so I am unable to provide photographic evidence of my metamorphosis.  Kate has
seen them so she can comment if she wishes.

OH MY GOD is my comment, lol. The before and after photos show two entirely different people. It's really astounding... miraculous even. Not that you were a bad-looking.. uhmmm... you know, that other sex. But the *difference* is just truly amazing. It's not an "improvement" on existing features, it's a complete metamorphisis.

And yes, Z is on the top of my short list as well. My only concern is that I just don't know if his endoscopic shaving will be enough, as I have no idea how thick my sinus/orbital rim bone is. The forehead overhang is my worst feature (along with hollow cheeks - but HRT should help there), so I'd hate to pay 30K for a minimal reduction. I really need to find a way to organize a skull X-ray.

For what it's worth, my wife knows me better than I know myself, and SHE insists that I will do it... and much sooner than I'd expect...  because I tend to be a perfectionist and want it ALL. And NOW. So, in spite of my idealistic ideas that I'm *trying* to make stick, odds are I'll end up doing it in the end. My informal prediction would be summer of 2007.

Sure, as soon as I hit that lottery...

[Melissa]

Kate has seen them so she can comment if she wishes.

I've seen them too and they are utterly amazing.  I also know somebody else that went to Dr. Z and had just as miraculous of a transformation.  If I had FFS, he is the Dr. I would go to, hence my first comment about him being better.

Melissa