I want to start a topic for reports/descriptions of Transgendered Day of Remembrance events you may have attended or participated in.
Please post your event.
-K
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Saturday, 18 November 2006 at the Metropolitan Community Church, Sacramento
Link to event. I arrived at the Sacramento MCC church at 6:20 PM. The service was to be held in the main chapel. I was greeted and handed a candle with a little paper circle for the candlelight portion of the ceremony. I greeted people I knew, and was approached by the local event organizer, Francie Milazzo. She asked me if I would take a card from the stack she had and read it when the name on the card was called, I accepted, and took a card. There were at least 20 cards, each with the name and details of the death of a transgendered person.
We began the event. The first speaker was Dave Fredrickson, the president of Sacramento PFLAG. He spoke about how his daughter first came out to him that she was either 'lesbian or bi', and how he prayed to God to fix her, just please fix her. The fundamentalist, evangelical church where they worshipped found out and in no uncertain terms asked them to leave. Then his daughter announced she had finally seen the light and was transitioning. Worn out from praying to God to fix his 'daughter', he now asked God to fix him, and help him to understand and accept his new son. This, he found, was something God would do, if he let Him.
Next was Elizabeth, a high school student who had just come out to her stepmother. She told her story of being born in Jamaica, raised in America, aspiring to be an entertainer, but always having the nagging thought that she really was a girl inside. Two years earlier, she had come to terms with herself. A trip back to her homo/trans-phobic hometown in Jamaica only reinforced her determination that this was the right path for her.
Rev. Vickie Kolakowski was the main speaker. Her talk was uplifting, as expected. But what really caught my attention was when she said that, as a group, the trans community has the highest murder rate of any group. Not only that, the murders (and beatings, and abuse,) are especially violent. The incidence of 'overkill' -- where the victim's body is violently mutilated by the assailant well after the victim is dead -- is also higher than in any other hate-motivated crime.
Finally, the first name was called. The bearer of the card with that name went up, lit her candle from the candle by the picture of Gwen Araujo, went to the podium and read the name and details, and stepped to the side of the podium to begin forming the line.
The name on my card was called next (I don't have it with me right now -- I left it at home.) I went up to the dais, lit my candle, then read the details -- a 35-year-old trans-woman who was found bleeding and naked in a neighbors' livingroom. Police took her into custody, and insisted on treating her as male, she became agitated, and a melee ensued, during which she stopped breathing -- and died...
One of the names was of a 3-year old child whose father would slap, hit, kick and punch him 'to toughen him up.' The father was afraid this child would not turn out masculine enough, and eventually beat the child to death.
After all the names were read, we stood in a circle with our lit candles, and anyone who wished to speak could.
I found this to be a profound, moving experience.
Karen
