One last try - Why Me?

[Gracie]

. . .

[Stormy Weather]

Face it. 

Some of us are lucky. That's all it is.

The most beautiful TS I ever met was a complete bitch; neurotic, spiteful, incredibly insecure and didn't have a single person who she could count on as a friend. I envied her looks but nothing else.

I'm no pin-up but I pass well, people tell me this. But it's a lucky brush with the gene fairy, nothing else. It's a small comfort but I take far more pleasure by being respected by my colleagues for the work that I do; this is something I have some control over and reflects on the quality of me as a person.

[Julie Marie]

Face it. 

Some of us are lucky. That's all it is.

The most beautiful TS I ever met was a complete bitch; neurotic, spiteful, incredibly insecure and didn't have a single person who she could count on as a friend. I envied her looks but nothing else.

Too often people with incredible looks think they don't have to do anything else but look beautiful.  And the world around them encourages that.  Their insecurity comes from the fact that one day they will lose those looks and they know they have made a life on that and only that.  Once the looks are gone, they are empty shells.  I too would be insecure and miserable if that was my future.  But if they do nothing about it, they have no one to blame but themselves.

Rommie, it's okay to say someone found you beautiful.  Just don't rub it in every one's face.  You'll come across as a neurotic, spiteful and incredibly insecure person.    Humility opens the soul, vanity locks it away.

Julie

[Melissa]

First of all Rommie, I agree with you 100% about telling how you passed and coming off as either arrogant or insensitive.  I would have people that found me attractive and I would post about it and as transition went along it would get more and more frequent.  More and more, I was shamed to not posting about it.  I think you were also one of those people who wanted me to act "humble".

I decided to not post much anymore about me passing.  There are a lot of situations that I have not shared like how I have passed in a highly TS-aware lesbian bar and stuff.  I personally think it is other people's own insecurites that cause them to lash out.  I have almost completely left the entire community on several occasions and hid in stealth as a result of this.  Apparently attractive (and especially young) TS's are rejected because the community does not feel the passable ones need support.  That's so far from the truth.  Passing is a double edged sword.  When you pass, you have the same expectations as women who have lived their entire lives as women thrust upon you.  When you don't pass, you can be discriminated against.  Of the 2 options, the first one is obviously preferred, but I don't think many in the community think about that downside.

P.S. I did read your other post in it's entirety.

Melissa

[Melissa]

Thanks Rommie.

Melissa

[Lori]

I got a chance to sit down with a friend and talk with her about her life the other day and my eyes had opened to a whole new light. See, she is about 5'5" and weighs in at 105lbs and is 22 years old. She is blonde and blue eyed and to say she is too pretty for Victoria Secrets is not an understatement. Her life is a living hell. She is constantly being hit on by men and WOMEN, and although she rarely has to buy her dinner or a drink she has stopped dressing cute and wearing makeup. It helped her somewhat but when you are just so beautiful you end up on the other end of the spectrum most ppl didnt know existed.

This poor girl cannot even stop and get gas without wolf whistles or somebody trying to pick her up. She cannot go to school without being harrased or even go out with her boyfriend without somebody (again male or female) trying to butt in and get to know her. She has lost track of how many times she was offered money to pose nude, or model. Although I am slightly jealous of her, I feel bad for her. Her world is completely different than those that are not attractive. She wished she was ugly so she could just live a normal life. That statement got me to thinking about many things. Where do you draw the line on beauty and what is it worth? Perhaps just looking female will be enough.

Getting attention is nice but there is such a thing as too much.