Washrooms, a bit of a rant, and feeling like a weird cliche

[Kareil]

My avoidance of public washrooms started when I got out of kindergarten and we no longer had a little cubicle in each class, because for some reason it was like none of the other kids knew that toilets *flushed* or something.  Seriously, you'd go in and all the toilets would be full of stuff like they were used to going in outhouses - we weren't that rural, though, I'm sure virtually everyone had real flushing toilets at home!  So I developed a bit of an iron bladder right from the beginning, rarely ever had to use them.  Had I used them more, I may have freaked people out a bit that didn't know me, but as I didn't, I'll never know.  It's not good for you, though, apparently weakens your muscles and can lead to UTIs, so "training" yourself not to go all day is probably a bad idea.

I do know that I once saw a guy in the girl's bathroom, just hanging out with some girls by the sinks, and thought nothing of it until after I'd left and then it hit me that something was a bit odd about that.

At work, we have a perfectly acceptable single stall customer/family/accessible washroom at the front of the store, and I've still found male co-workers in the women's employee washrooms when it's late and I'm the only other one that'd be using it.  They hide in there when they don't want the other guys to catch them sitting and reading magazines when they should be working.  *rolls eyes*  As a general rule, if you're going to stand and pee in the women's, whatever equipment you may have, please lift the seat and flush.  And any toilet is better than using the mop sink, or peeing in the corner of the lobby.  People complaining about where you go need to realize that there's far worse places you could do it...  ;-)

Truth is I've never been one to let male bullies push me around. What's the worst they're going to do? Hit me? That just means I get a free pass to hit them...and I've been spoiling for a fight ever since the other boys started the "we can't fight girls" thing in elementary school. Screw it. I don't know...I'm just not too afraid of being physically attacked, been there, done that, it's not even half as bed as what girls do, you get to fight back, plus the authorities actually take you seriously when you're being physically bullied.

Lucky you.  They never had problems picking fights with me, even ones that didn't know me from a hole in the wall, sometimes guys that were a couple grades lower than me, even, if they were still bigger than me.  And I just wasn't very good at fighting back, no experience, see - while my dad said hitting them back was the right thing to do, my mother was most adament that it was *not*, and the authorities in my case supported that latter view by only ever getting me in trouble for fighting back as the other kids were better liars, I was involved so often that naturally I must be the one that always started things, and why would a boy hit a girl for no reason?  (not to mention the implied if not said "you brought it on yourself for being different" even if you can't do anything about it that we're all surely familiar with)  It was kind of open season for them.  I really need to learn to throw a decent punch.

[gilligan]

I still use the ladies room in public, even when I'm with my queer friends. I was caught with one friend once who knows my as male, and since women seem to think they need to talk while in the restroom she said "hi, [male name]." I was kinda embarrassed, but I do get weird looks in the ladies's room all the time anyway. I just feel less vulnerable in there. That and I'm pre-T and refuse to use an STP device.

[Silver]

I am in a very similar arrangement except people aren't talking about me. Nobody really cares actually lol.

My counselor told me not to use either washroom, and I am to use the nurse's bathroom instead. See if the school nurse has a bathroom.

[Farm Boy]

I'd talk to the school officials and try to get it arranged for you to use a teacher's restroom or something.  It's not right for them to expect you to use the women's room, and I wouldn't recommend using the men's room if you think you'll be harmed.  Talk to somebody with authority, and they ought to be understanding if they're Ok with you being openly trans.  Good luck!

I've just lately begun to feel awkward going into the women's room in public, because what with my attempts at passing pre-T I've actually done it a few times recently.  I used a bathroom the other day that had a gigantic mirror inside, and from what I could tell I really didn't look like I belonged in there.  It's hard though because I don't know how people are reading me, and I don't want to cause a scene using the wrong bathroom.  Plus, I've never used the men's room except when the women's was out of order, so the idea is a little daunting.  I imagine everyone saying "Wrong!  Get out!"