FTM's who identify as gay men- i has questions! :)

[zombiesarepeaceful]

Well...I wasn't sure if I was gay or straight for the longest time. Now I'm growing more comfortable with myself and stuff and finding out that I'm definitely not attracted to women. It took accepting myself to accept that I'm gay.

[Elijah3291]

well I'm glad you know who you are now and self acceptance is good

[zombiesarepeaceful]

Yeah. It's cause of the changes to my body on T. Pre-T I felt like I cou l dn't identify as gay cause people would read me as a.....L word. Now that I pass 100% and am growing more comfortable with the growth of my bottom region, I feel confident that I won't be read as anything but male if I act or look or say I'm gay.

[kyril]

For those of you who identify as gay men, what is it like for you? Do you find that gay men are attracted to all of you- if you know what i mean? I'm thinking that quite possibly i identify as bisexual now, and i have no idea where to start! What is it like for you, how are your relationships with men and have you found general acceptance from gay men? any answers would be great. I'm such a noob! lol

It depends on the guy. And how horny he is. Men in general can pretty much be aroused by anyone, in the absence of strong social inhibitions; inhibitions that reinforce straight men's sexuality are socially encouraged from birth, but gay men only develop analogous ones later, and many don't develop them very strongly.

I say this in every sexuality thread, but here goes again: Men's sexualities are generally best described as relationship orientations rather than sexual orientations. Many/most men are functionally capable of having sex with someone of either/any physical sex and enjoying it just fine. Lots of gay men have sex with their female friends in the absence of a compatible male partner, and straight men notoriously have sex with each other in institutional environments where women are not available (and I do mean sex, as a separate phenomenon from the rape that occurs). "Straight" or "gay" or "bi", when a man applies them to himself, describes the type of people with whom he can have affection and emotional intimacy in a sexual context.

And as such, the type of person that you are is more relevant to a man's sexuality than your downstairs plumbing (or overall body type). Explaining the last bit: No man says that he's not gay because he's not attracted to every single man out there, or that men he's not attracted to are not actually men. If a gay cis man meets another cis man who happens to be overweight, and he's not attracted to the overweight guy, he's still gay and the overweight guy is still a man who still fits in the general category of "type of people the gay man could potentially be attracted to." Trans men are, similarly, another type of man, to whom not all gay men may be strongly physically attracted, but who fit in the correct sexual category as objects of potential attraction.

Even pre-everything, we can do just fine as long as we get ourselves placed in the correct mental gender "box" from the beginning.

[Alun C]

ALRIGHT! :DD This I can answer~ <3

Soo~ not all gay guys are attracted in that way to me -- and the few that have inquired *FEW -- don't have a binder y' see* learned easily that I was a hoax.  My relationship with men is a "OH HEY-- oh wait -- SWEET!". XDDD Although -- as my lover identifies as "Andro-FTM" borderline *shrug* -- I think I'm pretty much a Bisexual man towards him/her XDD <3


<3 Alun


*Maybe I didn't even answer this question QnQ*

[Alessandro]

Hard question to answer because it seems to be very different for everyone.  I think it depends on what you want to do with your body as to what you are expecting from them.  See I am not comfortable exposing my chest to anyone ever and I also only do anal sex (but am a bottom only) because I am freaked out by the other hole.  I also don't want anybody touching me anywhere in the gentital area except the arse and even wear boxers at the time so as not to show anything. 

So in this respect I reckon I am a pretty easy deal for a gay top.  They don't have to do anything that they wouldn't do with a cis-guy.  But I reckon it is very different for an ftm gay top, because a gay bottom might prefer a flesh penis to a strap-on type.  It's also different for a guy who is comfortable using his 'female parts'. 

At the moment I am in a relationship with a genderqueer person and am behaving as a gay bottom so am pretty comfortable.  In fact my partner has not seen me naked and finds it hard to imagine that I don't have a dick (apparently) which suits me very well! 

[Raven]

I'm bi myself and before my boyfriend and I hooked up (he's gay) he accepted me as a female and well we had a SM relationship he had no problem with it as long as he didn't have to penetrate me or have anything to do with my downstairs. Then one night while I was hopelessly drunk I came out to him and told him that I'm trans he wasn't all that surprized but he was pretty happy with it and accepted me with no problem. We still have an SM relationship but a bit more now obviously heh. We make it work in our own way. I'm just glad that he's a pretty open minded guy and everything heh.