About to write my letter + some possibly good news

[Lilly]

I'm about to start writing my letter. I don't know to who yet, but probably my parents. It's just I'm not very good at writing in general, so I was hoping for some tips. I plan on giving them the whole "you did a good job at raising me" talk before I actually get to the coming out part, then I'm stumped. Tips?

In other news, I learned my step-cousin is bi and she's always talking about LGB people, but not T-people. She's only 15 but should I tell her? I'm not sure if she would understand being trans.

[Shang]

I was 15 or 16 when I started to realize I was trans.

Anyway, you could include some good material on transgender issues and just about trangenderism (?) in general so they can have  a better understanding what transgender is.

[lilacwoman]

I'm about to start writing my letter. I don't know to who yet, but probably my parents. It's just I'm not very good at writing in general, so I was hoping for some tips. I plan on giving them the whole "you did a good job at raising me" talk before I actually get to the coming out part, then I'm stumped. Tips?

In other news, I learned my step-cousin is bi and she's always talking about LGB people, but not T-people. She's only 15 but should I tell her? I'm not sure if she would understand being trans.

Put the ' You did a good job bit in the middle of your letter.
Start off by saying you have a problem that's making you unhappy and need their help to sort it.  Then mention that you don't feel like the youngster they believe you are and lead into the possibility of being TS and needing some professional input.

How old are you and what's your neighbourhood like?

[Lilly]

I'm 19, going to be 20 soon. As for my neighborhood, I live in the middle of nowhere. I feel that I need to come out now, as my body isn't very masculine, nor is my voice (girl clothes fit me well, but since I'm in the closet I only wear girl jeans and socks). It's just I don't want to write my letter wrong so that my parents don't think I'm a freak, which is why I'm asking for tips.

[lilacwoman]

the only time I wrote a letter about my true feelings it did make me get treated as a freak so I'm not overly keen on the idea of letter writing.   

If you still live at home what is to stop you sitting down with parents and telling them you are not happy as a guy?

An awful lot of MtFs have done the secret crossdressing and in fact the is a quote 'all MtFs start as crossdressers but not all crossdressers are TS' and mothers are very good at finding stashes of female stuuf so many MtFs find coming out isn't all that of a surprise.

[Lilly]

Here's what I've got so far:

Dear Dad,
        I need to clear the air with you. There's something that's been bothering me my whole life. You saw a "happy" boy growing up. Yes, I was happy with certain events, but I've always been uphappy with who I am. This may shock you but....I'm a girl. I've always felt feminine and liked girl things. You have never known this because I was trying to be the son you saw in your eyes.

This is all I have so far...Is it good? Does it need work?

[lilacwoman]

nice start but why just Dad?

do you have any evidence to back up your claim of being a girl?  a letter from a therapist or soemthing?  or does that have to wait?

[Lilly]

I'm going to tell everybody one at a time, but I'm telling my dad first because I owe him an apology and explanation because when I was 17 he found all my clothes, shoes and makeup when cleaning my room. I never told him back then, and now he thinks I'm gay. I will eventually have to tell my religious grandfather, since he willed his house to me. I'm prepared to lose the house I've had so many childhood memories in. But for now, I'm writing a letter to my daddy.

[lilacwoman]

welll whatever you write he will rmemeber finding the stash and put 2 and 2 together and may be happier that you're TS and not gay.
good luck.

[spacial]

Lilly.

I like it. To the point.

Perhaps you could continue by saying exactly what you intend to do about it.

Finish by telling him that you will always love him and hope he can love you as his daughter as much as he did his son.

[MrsTorrance]

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[Lilly]

My parents are divorced. I live with my mother, so I can tell her face to face (when the time is right). However, I don't see my dad very often so I must tell him in the form of a letter. I'm going to include that if he disowns me to please not keep me from my little brother, even though he will not fully understand being transgendered (he's 10). I already know who will, won't, or maybe accept me. I just hope my dad is on the will list.

[lilacwoman]

your brother wil be prefectly familiar with the idea of changing sex so no worries there.
good luck in letting the family know.

[MrsTorrance]

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