Passing with Long Hair

[Hurtfulsplash]

I used to pass better when I had long hair (down to the middle of my back), but I was also skinnier then so the moobs didn't show. I couldn't be bothered to take care of it properly and it was hot so I got an undercut. The hair cutter did such a bad job (how the hell do you mess up an undercut) that I just went home and shaved the whole thing.

[ilanthefirst]

I want to apologize for neglecting "emo hair" in my original post.  I'm from the metal scene, and it didn't strike me as "long hair".  DX  But I agree with you guys that it's one of the easier styles for passing (and a very nice scene to be queer in, to boot). 

I quite like the just below ear level Italian/Spanish kind of look especially when teamed up with very expensive Italian labels.  I had my hair about jaw level for quite a long time before I came out as trans for that reason, I didn't see it as feminine.  As it is now I kind of need to have short hair just to masculinise me a bit.  I would like to have it longer again one day, when I don't have to worry about passing.

Ooh, that sounds very professional-looking, which is hard to pull off as a man with long hair in general.  I'm also guilty of seeing long hair as masculine on its own, and it's really jarring that society tends to see it as feminine if anything. 

But as for the hair thing...I think a good shortcut to making your hair look as male as you are male...condition the crap out of it. Creme rinse when you shampoo and when you don't.  And if that fails, if you have anything short of fully kinky hair, I would suggest herbal oil-based styling products or a little coconut oil-yep, make your hair greasier, so it'll look lanky and lie flat.

I think this can be very good or very bad avice depending on the shape and size of your head.  I have a teeny, tiny head, smaller than that of any woman I know, so if my hair is slicked back, it exaggerates the shape of my head as well as my feminine hairline.  My (cis-male) partner, however, is mistaken for a woman less often when he has it slicked back, because he has a masculine hairline and a somewhat bigger than the average male head.

I used to pass better when I had long hair (down to the middle of my back), but I was also skinnier then so the moobs didn't show. I couldn't be bothered to take care of it properly and it was hot so I got an undercut. The hair cutter did such a bad job (how the hell do you mess up an undercut) that I just went home and shaved the whole thing.

Aw, that's really sad!  It's hot as hell where I am, and I keep wanting to put my hair up higher on the back of my head, but I can't pass at all if I do that.  If I get an undercut, I'll probably be doing it myself.  /-:

[Kareil]

So basically, "too lazy to do anything with it" long hair is what we're talking about.

Hairdressers, when I ever allow myself to get dragged to them (rarely, and only if someone else is paying) seem to refuse to want to put layers in mine even if I ask, it naturally parts down the middle, most of my life I haven't had bangs (I've liked them for, er, "passing" as a woman, because hiding my forehead and the fact that I don't go to the salon to have my eyebrows professionally done - isn't just not having a unibrow enough? - definitely seem to make me look more feminine), people tell me I shouldn't just because they're a pain to grow out (why assume that everyone wants to grow them out right away?), and I nearly always wear it in a low ponytail.  I do look more feminine with shorter hair (though not actually *short*), because it looks vaguely styled, or if I don't just try and brush it straighter but use product to try and hold it in waves, I've noticed recently.  Where was this "Everything you're doing wrong to look girly" list 10 years ago?

The bangs also help hide the rather masculine hairline I've got, it seems to run in my mother's family judging from my cousins, even the females.  Part of why I'm afraid T will make me lose my hair like whoa.

Maybe I should try something emo, just for fun, since I've got a lot of hair products I've bought in the last while trying to do the curlier thing, and it mostly ends up looking stringy and falling down on its own after a while.  What's the worst that can happen, I get mistaken for a guy with shorter hair?  Since it sounds like at any time I can just carry on doing what I've done most of my life in the bare minimum hair and makeup department and be fine!

[insideontheoutside]

So basically, "too lazy to do anything with it" long hair is what we're talking about.

Hairdressers, when I ever allow myself to get dragged to them (rarely, and only if someone else is paying) seem to refuse to want to put layers in mine even if I ask...

Honestly, I think layers get a bad wrap. Yes, there was the bad feathered hair type of layers but the new styles aren't like that at all. Short haircuts are mostly layers. There are people (I would suspect mostly female) who don't like layers because they're always trying to "grow their hair out" or like that long hair look where it's all the same length. That to me is a really feminine hairstyle (long, all one length). Some guys can pull it off if it naturally grew like that or if it's curly but I mostly think of women when I think of that hairstyle.

[losthighway]

hi everyone,

just joined and wondered if there were any older ftms that like the 80's rocker look. i havent started t yet, but have the prescription for it. i have been holding off cause i dont want to lose my hair. i was just wondering if there was anyone with similar thoughts.

[Alexmakenoise]

just joined and wondered if there were any older ftms that like the 80's rocker look. i havent started t yet, but have the prescription for it. i have been holding off cause i dont want to lose my hair. i was just wondering if there was anyone with similar thoughts.

Yes.  Me.  I have kind of an 80's rocker look.  I don't want to lose my hair either.

[losthighway]

has anyone afraid of losing their long hair been brave enough to go and t and see no hair loss?

[Miniar]

has anyone afraid of losing their long hair been brave enough to go and t and see no hair loss?

Mine's thinned a bit, but it's not gone.

[emil]

haven't gone on t for pretty much the same reason i used to have an 80s rockstar haircut but i ended up looking more like john bon jovi.
in order to pass i have to go over my eyebrows with an eyebrow gel or dye the eyebrows and surrounding baby hairs (this is important, because i was told by several people they look at the brows in a long-haired person's face when they are trying to figure out their gender) . i guess people are still used to seeing guys in leather jackets and skinny jeans who have long hair.

[losthighway]

is it a fact that you will lose your hair eventually if you go on t? or is there a chance you wont?

[Aegir]

is it a fact that you will lose your hair eventually if you go on t? or is there a chance you wont?

Whether or not you get male pattern baldness is genetic, and looking at your grandfathers and great grandfathers will help you figure out if you've got it, since it's a gene carried on the x chromosome, and if you have a good copy and a bad copy the good one takes over and you don't go bald. (part of the reason very few women go bald) Having two x chromosomes, you're at an advantage against male pattern baldness since you've got twice the chance for a good copy of the gene.

[pebbles]

Whether or not you get male pattern baldness is genetic, and looking at your grandfathers and great grandfathers will help you figure out if you've got it, since it's a gene carried on the x chromosome, and if you have a good copy and a bad copy the good one takes over and you don't go bald. (part of the reason very few women go bald) Having two x chromosomes, you're at an advantage against male pattern baldness since you've got twice the chance for a good copy of the gene.

That's not how the mechanism works. I know where you got that from but I think that Wikipedia article is in serious need of revamping it talks a whole lot of crap. while there might be an X linked gene you ought to know that all females inactivate there second X chromosome. Thus the idea of "recessiveness" is critically flawed when talking about you guys.

X chromosomes work in a fundamentally different way from conventional autosomes.
Not only that it appears to be a muti-gene phenotype.
http://www.cell.com/AJHG/retrieve/pii/S0002929708001419

Chromosome 3 gene.

[losthighway]

is there a way to tell if you have that gene before you start t? or do you have to find out the hard way?

[Theo]

is it a fact that you will lose your hair eventually if you go on t? or is there a chance you wont?

It May happen. Hair loss happens if you are genetically disposed towards male pattern baldness. There are treatments to partially lessen this but they can have side effects possibly including breast growth.

A guide to Hormone therapy you can google for is

Medical Therapy and Health Maintenance for Transgender Men: A Guide For Health Care Providers.  it's by Gorton R, Buth J, and Spade D.

[pebbles]

is there a way to tell if you have that gene before you start t? or do you have to find out the hard way?

Well you could sequence your genome
http://www.decodeme.com/about-decodeme

But short of that there isn't any definite way in much the same in much the same way we girls don't know how big our boobs will get and although your parents and siblings might hold clues it still might surprise you at the end of the day what's in your bag. (I myself would have thought I would have been a D-cup based on the other females of my family not an A)

Once you start T those I ought to point out that the process is slow and you will notice it slowly coming to get you and you can take steps when it dose at those early stages (Dutastride/Rogain) before I transitioned I had the early stages myself although not real hair loss it was thinner on my crown and temples if I'd left it another 6 years I might have had real trouble.

[losthighway]

thanks for the info pebbles. are there any ftms here that have had success keeping their long hair? and if so, how did you do it?

[ilanthefirst]

thanks for the info pebbles. are there any ftms here that have had success keeping their long hair? and if so, how did you do it?

Are you asking if any FTMs here keep their hair long?  Because that's what this whole thread is about! 

If you're asking about whether those who have taken T kept a full head of hair, that's an entirely different question (one that I think you should ask in a separate post).  If you lose your hair on T, there's no proven way to stop it, although the same treatments marketed to cis-men should be just as effective on trans guys.  Really, it's a crapshoot, and one that anyone born XY plays whether they want to or not.  You need to ask yourself which is more important, getting the changes T will give you or (nearly) guaranteeing that you won't go bald.