Corrupt-A-Wish

[Constance]

I wish I had a rubber duck.

Granted, but it runs away with your best friend's rubber chicken.

I wish seafood was cheaper.

[King Malachite]

Granted.  Seafood is now illegal to eat in the states making it much cheaper for you.

I wish I had 20/20 vision.

[JayKyle]

Granted but 20/20 means your legally blind

I wish I could do a triple back flip

[King Malachite]

granted but you throw your back out every time you do one now

I wish I had an eggroll

[JayKyle]

Granted but its 3 weeks old and smells like athletes foot

I wish I was made of lint

[King Malachite]

Granted.  Now you have the honor of being stuck in a fat man's belly button for years to come.

I wish I could fly.

[JayKyle]

Granted except you are sucked into the turbine engine of a passanger plane and become red sauce

I wish they would post the next episode of TFP on youtube already!

[King Malachite]

Granted.  Too bad they take it down before you are able to see it.

I wish I knew how to duel with Yugioh cards.

[JayKyle]

Granted but Yu-Gi-Oh is no longer popular and no one will play against you

I wish World of Warcraft was completely free like Dungeons and Dragons

[King Malachite]

Granted.  WoW is free but the all of the rules changed completely and it gets so complicated that you refuse to play

I wish I was a professional boxer.

[JayKyle]

Granted but people box with swords now and you didn't get the memo till after you entered the ring

I wish the sun was blue

[King Malachite]

Granted.  The sun is blue and spits blue poisionous gas down to Earth and it kills people.

I wish I had facial hair.

[JayKyle]

Granted.  The sun is blue and spits blue poisionous gas down to Earth and it kills people.

Yay! Dreams do come true

Granted but you only have 3 hairs and they're 3 feet long each

I wish the primary colours were Red Green Purple

[King Malachite]

Granted but you are color blind so you couldn't tell the difference.

I wish I was stronger.

[ffern]

Granted, but everything else becomes heavier so you cant tell the difference

I wish pixies would tidy my room

[ohnoimaduck]

Granted, but they explode after they're done cleaning.

I wish Half-Life 3 was released already.

[King Malachite]

Granted but it's all sold out before you could get to it.

I wish my stomach was flatter.

[JayKyle]

Granted but everything else is puffed out

I wish my cat would stop teething

[King Malachite]

Granted.  Your cat stops teething but now it has diarrhea.

I wish I had my own apartment.

[JayKyle]

Granted but it has no ceiling and only two walls

I wish I could morph into a fish