tuned hearing...

[SoShy]

I normally don't post but this has been bothering me for a while and had to ask about this.

I've been out with friends and family (what I have left of it), and every now and then I'll hear comments like "is that a guy?" or "does that look like a girl to you?" and I've seriously begun to wonder if I'm slightly paranoid/crazy since every time I've heard such things, the person(s) I'm with all tell me they didn't hear anything when I ask them (in private).

I think I have unconciously tuned my hearing to pick up on this because I know my situation, or am I going crazy, or are they being overly supportive (similar to "just ignore them").

Any thoughts? Has anyone else noticed this?

P.S. sorry if this is in the wrong spot, but seemed like the best place for the post

[Janet_Girl]

I think that we are subconsciously listening for them.  I hear 'Man" when they said 'Ma am".  So we may hear something that is total different than what was actually said.

We just need to let those things roll of our backs, like water after a ducks back.

[azSam]

I know exactly how you feel. No matter what I go out as, man or woman, I am always looking around for people's reactions. I haven't heard any comments (yet), but I do notice some funky stares.

[spacial]

I get the feeling you're bumping into the dreaded psychos. Those idiots whose own lives are so utterly perfect they think they should interfere with everyone else's.

Ignore. Relax.

If you look for stairing, you will almost certainly find it.

[Hurtfulsplash]

They could also be talking about someone else.

[Randi]

Oh yeah, anytime my hair is long I get that all the time LOL. I must admit that my face is not what I would call pretty but if they can't see it well- then yes. I also should say that my chest has a feminine curve to it so I guess that factors in too-and I really don't mind the comments-they just let me know I am doing something right!
Randi

[SoShy]

Thank you all for the positive advice. Your comments remind me of the supportive things I've been told and try to hold onto through transition, they are so easy to forget at times, thanks for the reminders.   

@hurtfulsplash: that is a good one that I will try to keep in mind, it is always possible that they could be talking about someone else, I shouldn't assume it's about me.

[Hermione01]

Sorry for the late reply but here goes - in my case half the time what I hear is definitely directed at me while other times I have misheard a word or it was actually about someone else.

But there are words you cannot mistake, like recently someone said 'is that a ->-bleeped-<-?' but most times it's, 'is that a guy or a girl?' or similar  .

These kinds of people give me the %^%*#% cause when it comes down to it what business is it of theirs as Spacial has said. They have no shame in blurting these stupid comments out, it's so frustrating at times.

Maybe you're being hyper-aware and mishearing words which I hope is the case. 

[K8]

I confronted a waiter who said "Thank you, sir."  He was taken completely by surprise and assured me that he had said "Thank you, dear."

After that I started relaxing.  My hearing isn't all that great anyway.  I sometimes wonder if I heard properly - did they really say "he" or did they say "she"?  As you settle into your new role, your hearing will be less tuned to hear those (perhaps imagined) slights.

- Kate