Do you ever get like this?

[Raven]

Do you ever have days to where you just feel like throwing in the towel out of frustration or whatever the reason may be? Or do you just have some days where you just have some doubts? I do at times, but I have always found ways to look past them and move forward. Be it through a lot of thinking or other means.

[Devyn]

I get like that a lot. Especially the doubts part. Then I look in the mirror and it disappears. It's like, if I forget that I have a female body, then I'm actually content. And then I look in the mirror at my chest without binding and it makes me want to puke.

[Magnus]

I get frustrated about all of this a lot, but I never have any doubts at all. I either do this, or I remain like this and stay totally discontent with myself and my life. I can't do that, so in a way it's do or die for me – because I will die inside if I can't become me through and through.

Right now I'm frustrated because I can't start T until I either get insurance or else get a job. The latter is a possibility at the moment, but the former is next to impossible to achieve right now BECAUSE of this, further complicated because of this dead economy. So I'm just stuck like this until earlier next year when I find out if I'm getting put on my mom's Kaiser plan or not (they cover HRT). I just have to hang on until January and pray it's going to happen for me...

It just seems at times like it's never going to happen... and that hurts a lot, not going to lie. I just have to suck it up and distract myself with other things to get my mind off of brooding about it.