Questions about Facial Hair Pre-Transition!

[GQPAT]

So I'm in the very beginings of my transition...I have come out to (almost) all my friends/proffesors/classmates...I'm coming out to my parents next week (wish me luck...ooooh boy)....I have cut my smoking down to a meagre 1-3 cigs a day, by February I hope to be down to 0.....I'm have my first therapy session on Jan. 4th....I'm starting on Anti-As in February and E in March assuming the therapist gives me the OK and my blood tests come back with OK results....I havn't made my first electrolysis appointment yet but will do very soon!  Anyway....I guess that last bit leads me to the reasons for making this post:

I'm pretty young still (23) but I started growing facial hair @ a very young age...like 12 or 13 or so!  Now if you look back on pictures of me throughout my teenage years you'll see that 95% of them are with me with facial hair...and I mean tons of it...like full beards/thick goatees/etc!   A couple of my friends that I've come out to have even called me on it and my reasoning to them is this:

The mirror(s) and I have a seriously messed up history....I hated looking in the mirror for sooooo long (still do somewhat)...but for me, as a teen with suppressed/repressed gender-issues,  it was much easier for me to have facial hair on my face (that I couldn't see), and go for days/weeks without looking at myself than it was for me to have to look into the mirror EVERYDAY and do the HIGHLY MASCULINE act of shaving my face!  I hated shaving my face (and still do) because it reminded me....in a very visual/visible way....that I had a male body!  I've never heard of any other MTF describe their experience like that so I wonder if I'm unique in that sense!  What's more masculine, the act of shaving the face or having very visible facial hair? 

Anyway....some thoughts on this would be awesome!  I'm curious what others went through in terms of dealing with facial hair!

Cheers: Pat

[Melissa]

I would say I personally would consider having facial hair more masculine.  Shaving is not a "masculine" act, it is a way to remove hair.  I would say on average, women shave much more than men (if you include the rest of the body ) and some women even shave their face.

As for dealing with the hair, I had weekly electrolysis back in December/January at the beginning of the year (about 9 hours total) and it hardly made a dent, so I stopped for a while to start saving up money.  In May, I started facial hair removal by laser and although I still have to shave a few hairs off now, once I do, you really can't tell I have hair on my face.

Melissa

[GQPAT]

True enough....but what's the deal with laser...I mean....doesn't it grow back (almost) always?  I'm scared of spending thousands of dollars only to have to spend many more thousands three-to-five years later!

Cheers: Pat

P.S. Okay I realize this topic should probably now be moved to the hair-removal section but whatevs

P.P.S.  I came out to one of my friends the other days (who also happens to be one of my classmates...I'm in Women's Studies) and she asked me if I would start shaving my pits/legs and I told her that it probably has to do with my 10+ years spent in the punk/feminist/queer communities that I told her I would not....we then proceeded to compare body hair and my legs are definitely more hairy than hers but wow she's got me beat in the pit area!

[Kate]

I'm pretty young still (23) but I started growing facial hair @ a very young age...like 12 or 13 or so!  Now if you look back on pictures of me throughout my teenage years you'll see that 95% of them are with me with facial hair...

Me too! When I was young, I nearly always had a goatee-type thing going. Not that it ever worked well, as it was always SO sparse people constantly made fun of me for it.

I was actually TRYING to look masculine, which I'll admit sounds kinda contrary to being TS I guess... but I was always terrified people would think I was gay (not that there's anything wrong with it, but kids can be cruel) because I was so slightly built. TALL as heck, but... willowy? I always felt I looked WAY too feminine for a guy, and was constantly trying to AVOID that, oddly enough.

Fast-forward a few decades and my beard had become my most-detested attribute. I'd shave it until I bled, and STILL keep shaving. I tried epilating it for a few months... omg, the pain. I tried those silly "hair inhibitor" products (don't bother). Then Dermablend to hide it (though the blood soaked through). I mean I was seriously obsessed with it.

FINALLY, at 42 used laser treatments to kill it. Eight laser sessions later, I really only have a few scattered hairs around the mouth left.

Yay!

[Melissa]

Ok, I moved it for you.  

First of all, laser got a bad reputation for hair browing back because of the old lasers.  I believe there are still some in use today, but tend to be in cheaper places like out of a doctor's office.  If you go with laser, I would strongly recommend either the LightSheer diode laser (which I use) or the new Aurora laser, which is supposed to work on non-dark hairs too.  I spent probably $2000 on my laser treatments and everything is all paid for at this point.  After I'm done, I will probably need a little touchup with electrolysis.

There are several advantages I see to laser with regards to the TS.  Mostly is the fact that you don't need to let your hair grow all out.  You come in clean shaved for treatments.  The other is how quickly you go from being hairy to having few enough hairs to pass well.  Results for me seem to be working better than some of my friends who are getting it done, so it can vary from person to person.  Also, I would recommend going to a laser center that specializes in laser hair removal.  You will probably find they are using one of the lasers I mentioned above.

Melissa

[Kate]

True enough....but what's the deal with laser...I mean....doesn't it grow back (almost) always?  I'm scared of spending thousands of dollars only to have to spend many more thousands three-to-five years later!

You won't get a consistent answer to this. You'll find many people saying they "hear it alls grows back," and yet EVERYone I've polled who has actually DONE it hasn't experienced any regrowth whatsoever. Some of them are over five years since their last treatment. So... I'd just say ask around, educate yourself on the different types of lasers, what works and what doesn't, etc., and draw your own conclusions as to whether or not it's worth it.

My personal opinion is that your best bet is if you have very dark hair, use a LightSheer or Coolglide laser (others may work too, but these seem the most reliable), and have a doctor operate it.

One warning though: most doctors will suggest it'll only take 6 sessions to get it all, but most of the people I've spoken with say it took them 8-20 sessions. You get to a point where's it's more efficient to just use electrolysis to zap the last few hairs.

[GQPAT]

I have pretty dark hairs so I think laser would work well on me and from what I've been hearing most people end up using a combination of (both) laser and electro....so it's just a matter of paying for it now which is hard as I'm still unemployed (ie: struggling student living off a line of credit) but I'm getting a full-time job starting January @ a 12.50/hour place sooooo yeah...soon enough...soon enough!

Cheers: Pat

P.S. BTW....I think as a TS I'm in a pretty priviledged position for three reasons: 1) Out of 120 students in my department there are roughly 10 other trans-folk, 2) out of 20 profs that teach there, there are 4 trans, and 3) at the call-centre where I'll be getting a job there are 300 people  (100 of which are queer...ie: gay/lesbian/bi/trans....and out of that number there are 10 trans-identified folk)!  So needless to say I'm in pretty supportive environment(s)!

[Melissa]

P.S. BTW....I think as a TS I'm in a pretty priviledged position for three reasons: 1) Out of 120 students in my department there are roughly 10 other trans-folk, 2) out of 20 profs that teach there, there are 4 trans, and 3) at the call-centre where I'll be getting a job there are 300 people  (100 of which are queer...ie: gay/lesbian/bi/trans....and out of that number there are 10 trans-identified folk)!  So needless to say I'm in pretty supportive environment(s)!

At work, as far as I know, I'm the only TS and everyone has been extremely supportive.  There are a couple gals at work that started after I transitioned that I suspect may be bi, but I'm not certain.  I guess my point is that to be supportive, it does not matter if others are part of the GLBT community.

Anyhow, good luck on the facial hair.

Melissa

[Cindi Jones]

I had my facial hair removed before laser treatments were available.  I had a full dark beard with a lot of red hair.  I would often grow it out but not for the reasons you mention.  When I travelled on business, I'd plan to dress up and go out.  If I let it grow and then cut it for these special occasions, I could get a much closer shave and my face was much softer.  When I started traveling every week, I had to keep it cut all the time.  And I was going out all the time too!

You can get laser now. Go for it.  Electrolysis hurts, costs a lot, and takes forever. 

Cindi

[GQPAT]

  I guess my point is that to be supportive, it does not matter if others are part of the GLBT community.

Oooooh boy....trust me I know that much for sure....there are tons of (bio)gay males that I've encountered who are either extremely transphobic or feel entitled to ask trans-folk, that they barely know, REALLY personal questions such as genital status/etc.  A lot of them figure that because they're gay they're more entitled to ask then straight folk!  I always reply with something like "maybe if you become really close friends with that person then you'll find out but as a stranger/aquantaince you have absolutely NO RIGHT asking those (types) of questions"

It is just nice knowing that there is a queer support network (and yes I realize the politics involved in automatically labelling a trans person as queer) because I definitely identify as queer so it's nice to know!

Cheers: Pat

[KarenLyn]

When I first transitioned I tried shaving and keeping the shadow covered with makeup but by noon it would start showing through. I started using an epilator on the weekends and tweezed the ones that got missed the rest of the time. I don't recommend it. It hurts like H. Lightshear laser worked well  for me. The office gave me a 3 year no regrowth guarantee in writing. It's been 6 years and I've no complaints. I will need a few strays done with electrolysis but I don't have any more than a born woman at my age.

[Kate]

Lightshear laser worked well  for me. The office gave me a 3 year no regrowth guarantee in writing. It's been 6 years and I've no complaints.

Six years since your last LightSheer session? Have you had any significant regrowth since then? Did you have any regrowth after the main batch of sessions were done? How many sessions did you have?

Just curious what to expect, as I'm wrapping up with the LightSheer myself having done 9 sessions now...

Kate