Telling my sister

[tori319]

Well, I don't actually have any siblings but my best friend is like my sister.I realize that the reason my therapist wanted me to meet people was so that I would have someone in my life who was supportive, and so I wouldn't detransition because of the stress of not having anyone.My friend and I are both 19 and we've been friends since we were 11.My initial plan was to wait until I was on hrt, but maybe now is the time to tell her.The way I've figured it ,if she rejects me it won't hurt any less if I'm on hormones so maybe the time is now.Well, not today but I'm thinking of telling her in two an a half weeks.I just want a couple more weeks of normal before I drop the bomb.The reason I posted was to ask how you told the people closest to you and how you did it.

[Cindy]

Hi Tori,

I just told them. My immediate family I invited over for dinner and presented as me, fully dressed. My wife already new and accepted Cindy all our married life. Friends I just told. It's one of those strange things of presenting our selves as TG, it is often less of an issue for others than it is for us, strangely. When I came out to family my sister in law just said, Oh I've known that for years. We go out together  regularly for dinner. Her husband has been totally accepting, in fact everyone I have told has been.
And you are a very lucky girl to be on HRT at 19, hope it all goes well for you.

OH BTW if you are that close to your female friend, she probably already suspects. I would invite her for a coffee or some such thing and tell her straight out. 

Hope it goes well
Hugs
Cindy

Hugs
Cindy

[tori319]

Hi Tori,

I just told them. My immediate family I invited over for dinner and presented as me, fully dressed. My wife already new and accepted Cindy all our married life. Friends I just told. It's one of those strange things of presenting our selves as TG, it is often less of an issue for others than it is for us, strangely. When I came out to family my sister in law just said, Oh I've known that for years. We go out together  regularly for dinner. Her husband has been totally accepting, in fact everyone I have told has been.
And you are a very lucky girl to be on HRT at 19, hope it all goes well for you.

OH BTW if you are that close to your female friend, she probably already suspects. I would invite her for a coffee or some such thing and tell her straight out. 

Hope it goes well
Hugs
Cindy

Hugs
Cindy

thanks but I'm not on hormone yet that's why I'm not sure if I should tell her. My plan was to wait until I was on them but the way I see it won't be any less painful if she rejects me then instead of now.

[Cindy]

Hi Tori,

Being on or off hormones does not affect being TG in any way. Except of course the physical side effect we desire. Brain wise nothing. I do not in any way to prompt you etc, but in the end we have to tell the people we love. And if they love us there is no problem.

Cindy

[spacial]

tori.

Really pleased you've taken this decision. But actually doing it is really just taking the bull by the horns, so to speak.

[Imadique]

Actually I would say you might be a little more stable in your reaction if anything goes wrong if you do it before the HRT if you're anything like I was (a little...unbalanced, for the first few months). She's your best friend though, it's hardly likely to. She might be shocked and need some time to get used to it but that's perfectly reasonable and not a negative reaction.

I told my two closest friends in the clumsiest way imaginable and had to have two attempts with one of them 'cos I just could not get my point across (and couldn't bring myself to directly say what I wanted to) leaving her very frustrated until the time she knew what was going on! From there all my other friends were easier, most were either enthusiastic or nonplussed, the only problem was that some of the earliest people I told (after the two close friends) thought it was an elaborate practical joke because I didn't make such a big deal out of telling them (and it was still a long while before I changed my name and presentation).

As those before have said - tell her straight out, she's your best friend and she will take it well. Explain how you feel, why you feel that way and what you have to do about it and also that you're still the same person she already loves and that won't change - your friendship will in all likelihood become stronger for it.

[pebbles]

I wouldn't say that's entirely accurate Cindy. In terms of my Hobbies interests and feelings towards others however your absolutely right. there were in my case some emotional changes and libido changes which are brain focused.

[tori319]

Today is the day,I'm incredibly nervous but I'm going through with it.We're going to go to the movies.I'm going to tell her after the movie gets out.Wish me luck,I hope I don't punk out.

[Randi]

I told my sister two weeks ago while we were on a family vacation in the Gulf. We were the only one's out in the water and she started asking some 'pointed' questions and I decided to go ahead and just tell her all of it-it was great to be totally honest with her and she has turned out to be my greatest ally.
Randi

[spacial]

Today is the day,I'm incredibly nervous but I'm going through with it.We're going to go to the movies.I'm going to tell her after the movie gets out.Wish me luck,I hope I don't punk out.

Think you'll be fine.

Good luck.

[ChrisTinaBruce]

I told my mom and sister this past Christmas, after being on HRT for about a year.  I live in Dallas, TX and they are back home in Atlanta, GA.  They both have been amazing.  Being advice is to take it slowly.  Tell them you love them but be firm as to this is the real you.  That you are not asking for their permission or acceptance.  This will stop the week long conversation about trying to fix you.  Tell them you love them and want them in your life, but understand it is their choice.

Good Luck.


My mom, sister and me at Pride in Atlanta this year.





Chris Tina Foxx Bruce

[spacial]

ChrisTinaBruce

That picture is wonderful. I'm so happy for you. You look pretty happy yourself!!!!