MTF Transitioning in your thirties (30's)?

[Adabelle]

Hi all,

I'm 33 right now, and as I think about the possibility of transition I am looking for examples and stories of people who transitioned in their mid-30's. But it seems like it's hard to find examples and/or pictures of people who transitioned in their 30's. I'm seeing lots of examples of people who transitioned in their 20's, and then there's a number of people who talk about transitioning in their 40's and 50's. But for whatever reason not a lot on people in their 30's.

I just don't know what to expect. Part of my fear about transitioning is that it might be "too late" for me to transition, or that I might not pass or something. I suppose I just feel like there's not very many people in my age range that have talked about transitioning in their 30's. Oh how I wish I had addressed this all earlier in life, but as many of you have said you really can't address this stuff until you're ready to do it. Even now I'm not sure I'm ready, but I know that I am to the point in my mindset that the question must find some kind of resolution either way. Either I need to move forward, or accept my life as-is and find something to just "get by" for the rest of my years. I don't know how either of these are possible, but I hope to find the answers soon.

Anyway, I'm curious if anyone has any ideas about 30's transition in terms of how the body handles it, and whether or not they have friends who successfully transitioned around this age and turned out passable and happy. Am I right in thinking that I'm not seeing as many examples online of people who transitioned in their 30's? If so I wonder why that is.

[marleen]

Hello Madelyn,
As someone who just turned 40, I may not qualify to answer your questions, but I believe there are things far more important than your age. It's you and how you feel. If you believe the only thing that will make you happy is transition, then it does not matter what age you are.
What exactly do you think about yourself that will make you less passable?

[Aidan_]

I'm in my early twenties, so I don't fit into your swimming pool

Anyway, it depends on a number of factors. Stress, nutrition, fitness, and how much effort you put into it are among them. I've seen horrid transition results from people as young as 19; however, I've also seen wonderful transitions done by people in their 50's.

If you get serious about your overall health and put your heart into this, you'll come out with wonderful results.

[annette]

hello there

You are wondering if it's not too late to get your transition in your thirtees.
I was in my early thirtees when I finally get my transition and I can tell you that I've never for only 1 second had any regrets.
Of course you can be happy, if only you finally have your idention you can do what ever you wants.
The sky is the limit but, you have to work hard for it. nothing in live is for free but there is a world of oppurtunity's out there.
For me, I switch career, I get married.
Believe in yourself and in your skills.
But, before you make the big step, be absolutely sure that this is the only way  for you to live further, if you are'nt sure you 're a transexual it could be very dissapointing.

with love
annette

[K8]

I just don't know what to expect. Part of my fear about transitioning is that it might be "too late" for me to transition, or that I might not pass or something. I suppose I just feel like there's not very many people in my age range that have talked about transitioning in their 30's. Oh how I wish I had addressed this all earlier in life, but as many of you have said you really can't address this stuff until you're ready to do it. Even now I'm not sure I'm ready, but I know that I am to the point in my mindset that the question must find some kind of resolution either way. Either I need to move forward, or accept my life as-is and find something to just "get by" for the rest of my years. I don't know how either of these are possible, but I hope to find the answers soon.

These are common worries.  As Annette said, take your time to be sure transition is right for you. 

As someone who transitioned in her 60s, I can tell you it is never too late unless you're dead.  Early on I was talking to a close friend who is in his 80s.  I was waffling about whether it would be worth it, transitioning so late in life.  He said: "How many years do you have left?  20?  30?  That's a long time to be unhappy."

- Kate

[jennajane]

Me me !!! I am transitioning in my 30's.  I agree there doesn't seem to be a lot of us.  I am 33 and 1 month HRT at this point, so I am not sure if I have many experiences to share.  I think it is a great time to transition, of course I would have liked to have done it younger now, but back then I didn't have enough confidence to make that decision.  Now I do and I have some financial ability to get me through the process.

When I decided to transition, it was when I accepted myself as a transsexual woman.  I have no plans of stealth and if people view me as trans the rest of my life, I am OK with that.  So the only transition if passable question is really not important.

Good luck!
Jenna

[Epigania]

I am 35  and just started HRT.  I certainly how I'm not too old.  :-)

[lauraspeirs81]

I'm right at the start of the process and hit the big 3-O this month. So I see myself as a thirty-something transitioner. I've noticed a dearth of info from thise in our age group. I sometimes worry about doing this at an age when sexual dimorphism seems to be most marked but at least we're more likely to have the income to do something about it

I would like to be in you 30-40 transition club please

With love

Laura

[Robert Scott]

I am in the same boat...I am in my late 30's and I finally decided I was going to go for it...I am tired of being mistaken as a girl when I know I am a man

[Nero]

There are a lot of 'mid' transitioners who transition in their late 20s/early 30s. It may not be as common as the early or late peeps though. Wonder why that is.

[Izumi]

Hi all,

I'm 33 right now, and as I think about the possibility of transition I am looking for examples and stories of people who transitioned in their mid-30's. But it seems like it's hard to find examples and/or pictures of people who transitioned in their 30's. I'm seeing lots of examples of people who transitioned in their 20's, and then there's a number of people who talk about transitioning in their 40's and 50's. But for whatever reason not a lot on people in their 30's.

I just don't know what to expect. Part of my fear about transitioning is that it might be "too late" for me to transition, or that I might not pass or something. I suppose I just feel like there's not very many people in my age range that have talked about transitioning in their 30's. Oh how I wish I had addressed this all earlier in life, but as many of you have said you really can't address this stuff until you're ready to do it. Even now I'm not sure I'm ready, but I know that I am to the point in my mindset that the question must find some kind of resolution either way. Either I need to move forward, or accept my life as-is and find something to just "get by" for the rest of my years. I don't know how either of these are possible, but I hope to find the answers soon.

Anyway, I'm curious if anyone has any ideas about 30's transition in terms of how the body handles it, and whether or not they have friends who successfully transitioned around this age and turned out passable and happy. Am I right in thinking that I'm not seeing as many examples online of people who transitioned in their 30's? If so I wonder why that is.

Transitioned in my 30s, 32 to be exact.

This is a picture of me at 29:  http://www.hawaiibd.com/10.jpg

This is a picture of me now:  http://www.hawaiibd.com/AC6.jpg

HRT 1.9yrs,  Diet and exercise and hair removal  2 yrs+
I did everything i possibly could to get my body into shape for this thing, and to look as good as i could possibly get for over 2years.  If you have questions i would be glad to help.

[MillieB]

The funny thing is that the majority of trans women that I actualy know are in their 30's but, your right, there aren't that many testimonials out there which I was unhappy about because I think that when you are in your 30's you tend to be more worried that hrt won't have the desired effect and want to see good results to give you hope (thanks Izumi )

I'm only five months in on hrt and started at 38, I was also still smoking at the time so progress has been slowish, but people really are starting to see noticable changes but as ever, I'm trying to keep expectations realistic.

If all else fails then there is always the scalpel!

[Rock_chick]

Technically I'm 30, but as I have to get out my driving licence to get people to believe it I'm not sure I count

[regan]

Even now I'm not sure I'm ready, but I know that I am to the point in my mindset that the question must find some kind of resolution either way. Either I need to move forward, or accept my life as-is and find something to just "get by" for the rest of my years. I don't know how either of these are possible, but I hope to find the answers soon.

I think in alot of ways, you're already answering your own question, as in "I don't know what else to do BUT transition".  I'm trying to think of the right phrase and all that comes to mind is "transition or die" either mentally or physically.  We all reach that point at some time in our life, for you it just happened to be your 30s.

As for being successful, a haphazard response to a disaster is probably worse then the disaster itself.  Take your time, plan your next moves and be thorough about your transition - don't be another failed transition.  Something no one wants to talk about happening in their 20s, 30s or 60s.

Anyway, I'm curious if anyone has any ideas about 30's transition in terms of how the body handles it, and whether or not they have friends who successfully transitioned around this age and turned out passable and happy. Am I right in thinking that I'm not seeing as many examples online of people who transitioned in their 30's? If so I wonder why that is.

In my experience most people transition and get on with their life.  They don't project the trans persona online post-transition becuase they're just female, trans is a means to an end, and they just want to live a normal life.

[Vanessa_yhvh]

I turn 40 in just over a month, and you can see how HRT has been treating me on my SydneyTinker channel on YouTube. I've been at it just over 7 months.

Right now I can't think of anything I'd trade it for, even though I'm only several months in.

[carolinejeo]

It is never too late. But, of course, the younger the better.

Caroline

[kelly_aus]

I'm 35 and started my transition a while back.. Just going through the required motions to start HRT, which hopefully will happen in the next few months - but I need to give up smoking first.. I'm doing this for me, so passing is not my number one aim, but it would be nice.. But it seems that good results come from hard work rather than simply age.. Yes, starting young is better, but as Kate and others demonstrate, you can start much older and still have great results..

[Adabelle]

Thanks so much for everyone who responded to my original question. It does indeed seem like there are less people in their thirties who are posting their experience on here, but I think that the reasons that many of you are giving here make total sense. Like, once many transition they want to get on with life, and so maybe become less active in the community as a result.

I also wonder if maybe my concern about how my body will fare through the transition, and whether I can be passable is also a function of my age. I look around at many of the women in my peer group and basically I wonder if I can blend in with them. I look at my body currently and then look at many in my peer group and wonder if maybe I'll just stick out like a sore thumb and draw too much attention to myself. Seeing a few of the pictures posted is really helpful, and I'm so glad that so many of you responded. You are all very beautiful.

One thing that also sticks out for me in this thread is all the talk about if you put in the time and work hard at your transition you can have great results. I think I'll start another thread about this because I'm interested in this topic more in terms of the hard work that needs to be done, and how to know what that is for you.

Ultimately, I want to be sure I can be successful and feel better about myself and my body as a result of transition. Both in terms of confirming both with myself and my therapist that this something I absolutely need to do, and in making sure I have the tools and the strength to have a healthy and successful transition. I've experienced enough pain in life because of this - I want it to end, but I want to be sure I'm not making the decision too hastily. All your thoughts are so helpful. Thank you!

[lilacwoman]

it is possible that the lack of 30's MtF's may be because most are still in the marriages they entered in the days when they didn't or couldn't acknowledge being TS.

[Nicky]

I kind of agree with lilac. Also I think it is a combination of young kids, relatively new marriages, financial pressures etc make it hard to transition in your 30's.

I'm 33, I am happy, I 'pass', though I live openly as a trans person.