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Being around other trans...

Started by Dominick_81, December 22, 2010, 05:34:57 PM

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Dominick_81

What does cis stand for?

That's how I feel around other trans guy, I feel I'm not manly enough.
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GnomeKid

Quote from: Dominick_81 on January 07, 2011, 12:40:03 PM
What does cis stand for?

That's how I feel around other trans guy, I feel I'm not manly enough.

not 100% sure but I believe it means "same" 
I just know that in chemistry a cis conformation has the same atoms on the same side and in a trans confirmation they're opposite.  Makes sense to me that cis-gendered people are the same gender as the sex they were born into and that trans-gendered people are the opposite.  I think its a dumb term though. 
I solemnly swear I am up to no good.

"Oh what a cute little girl, or boy if you grow up and feel thats whats inside you" - Liz Lemon

Happy to be queer!    ;)
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tekla

What does cis stand for

It just give the ability for those that use it to toss everyone who is not one of them into one huge group that they then can treat as 'the other.'  Its a way of diminishing other people really.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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Dominick_81

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cynthialee

I have heard two diferant origens of CIS

First already mentioned is a latin/chemistry term.

The other is that it is Comfortable In Skin.
So it is said that if you know your enemies and know yourself, you can win a hundred battles without a single loss.
If you only know yourself, but not your opponent, you may win or may lose.
If you know neither yourself nor your enemy, you will always endanger yourself.
Sun Tsu 'The art of War'
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crazyandro

Yeah, I know what you mean.  Sometimes around other trans people I feel inferior, because I don't pass as well, and I'm jealous of the T.  But I still really like being around people like me.  Community, ya know.
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Brent123

I know one transman. Being around him is nice because he knows what it's like. Plus he's post T and he's had chest surgery so I can get tons of advise from him. For me, it's just easier to talk to him about everything.

I wouldn't know about not passing as well though because I'm pre everything. Perhaps, once I start T that would be a problem but as of now, it's not.
Every day brings me one step closer to being myself.
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xAndrewx

Sometimes I get uncomfortable around the transguys because I have some social issues so it seems like they all group up and I feel a little left out even when they try to include me but as far as feeling less manly, I don't

kadin

Both trans men and non-trans men struggle with not being manly enough. It's part of a patriarchal system of oppression. Men are raised to believe there is only so much masculinity to go around and everyone is out to see who can get the most, thus masculinity is always imperiled or in crisis. That is why men emasculate each other. By calling one man a wimp or a pussy, you are stripping some of their masculinity for yourself which is part of a larger system of power and control. It's all socially constructed. Instead of looking at another guy's masculinity look at your own and ask yourself, is it enough for me?

I struggle with not being masculine/male enough. But it helps put it all in perspective when I am able to understand how masculinity/femininity/gender is socially constructed... and therapy helps too :)
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jmaxley

Quote from: kadin on January 08, 2011, 09:00:47 PM
Both trans men and non-trans men struggle with not being manly enough.
Maybe that's why I feel more comfortable around women...because I know I'm the manliest in the group lol.  Hanging around with guys, trans or not, I have trouble feeling masculine.  Especially like when I go to say something and it's a female voice that comes out. :/
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Father Way

Quote from: kadin on January 08, 2011, 09:00:47 PM
Both trans men and non-trans men struggle with not being manly enough. It's part of a patriarchal system of oppression. Men are raised to believe there is only so much masculinity to go around and everyone is out to see who can get the most, thus masculinity is always imperiled or in crisis. That is why men emasculate each other. By calling one man a wimp or a pussy, you are stripping some of their masculinity for yourself which is part of a larger system of power and control. It's all socially constructed. Instead of looking at another guy's masculinity look at your own and ask yourself, is it enough for me?


Well said.
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Kitpup

Actually I had a transguy friend years before I came to my realization and he was always really open about who he is and everything, so I have always been comfortable and followed his example. I felt uncomfortable for about five minutes but just talking about it with him cleared that up.
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Nimetön

Quote from: Dominick_81 on January 07, 2011, 12:40:03 PM
What does cis stand for?

In science, we use this prefix to refer to a organic chemical who's carbon chain is linear.  When struck with a photon, some chemicals will absorb that energy into a location on the chain, resulting in a 'kink.'  The process is sometimes called photoisomerization (the word means "light causes a change to a similar chemical.")  The photoisomerization of a biochemical called 11-retinal, which is the dark pigment in the pupil of your eye, is the basis of vision: a photon strikes a linear cis-11-retinal and folds it into a kinked trans-11-retinal, and the nearby proteins register the event.

More generally, 'cis-' means 'rigid,' 'linear,' 'on a single plane,' and is derived from the older parlance, 'nearby.'  It is used only in chemistry, not in common parlance.  In Latin, it means 'on this side of' or 'on the near side' and 'trans-' means 'across.'  Basically, some graduate of our nation's fine liberal arts institutions leafed through the dictionary in search of an antonym to 'trans-.'  (Honestly, when someone says 'cis-male,' I think of a man with a degenerative bone disease, all joints fused, on life support.)

As for comparison to other transmen, I can only offer the equivalent position from the perspective of biological males: we judge each other largely on character and ability; a marine is respected for combat skill and physical discipline (and we admire them), whereas a scientist is respected for mathematical skill and knowledge of his field (and we are also admired), and all men are admired for integrity.  As Bearded and Tekla have said, you're not in competition; show professional skill and good character, and we'll respect that.

Quote from: kadin on January 08, 2011, 09:00:47 PM
It's part of a patriarchal system of oppression.

As a general warning for those who wish to mingle with biological males, feminist political philosophy and related hate-speech tend to result in permanent ostracism.

- N
While it is entirely possible that your enemy entertains some irrational prejudice against you, for which you bear no responsibility... have you entertained the possibility that you are wrong?
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Brent123

Quote from: jmaxley on January 08, 2011, 10:12:11 PM
Maybe that's why I feel more comfortable around women...because I know I'm the manliest in the group lol.  Hanging around with guys, trans or not, I have trouble feeling masculine.  Especially like when I go to say something and it's a female voice that comes out. :/
It's weird because I actually feel the same way. Usually, I'm more comfortable around girls then I am around guys. I have a few guy friends but that's because I've known them my whole life so I'm more comfortable around them.
Every day brings me one step closer to being myself.
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ty.to.the.man

sean,
i feel exactly the same way dude!
wen i went to a trans camp ther wer sum ftms that were not passing well,
so pronouns were realy hard.
-- Alexander Tyler (call me Tyler though)   8)
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