Late at night dysphoria. D:

[Devyn]

Anyone with me?

It's almost 11 PM. Just took off my ace bandage, watching American Dad, and being incredibly dysphoric while drinking soda and listening to a German band. O:

Anyway. That's not what I meant to say. Lol.

Anyone else get really dysphoric at night? It happens when I'm trying to fall asleep, a lot. Also, today, I binded unevenly so one boob was flatter than the other. It wasn't noticeable, but I could feel it.

Sometimes I wish I couldn't un-bind. I'd rather deal with the pain than my boobs being all in my way and right there, you know?

AND MY HAIR GREW SO DAMN LONG IN THE PAST TWO MONTHS. D: WHY DOES IT GROW SO DAMN FAST? My friend has been wearing extensions in her hair for practically over a year now until her hair grows out to the length she wants it because her hair grows so slow. My hair grows too fast. DX

[Marcelo Caetano]

I'm not sure if I get particularly dysphoric at night, but I have a lot of troubles to sleep (I'm on sleeping pills).
I think too much, and often the wrong things.

Try to put your mind in other things. I always sleep with the tv on, so I can focus in some random show instead of thinking!

[Devyn]

I'm not sure if I get particularly dysphoric at night, but I have a lot of troubles to sleep (I'm on sleeping pills).
I think too much, and often the wrong things.

Try to put your mind in other things. I always sleep with the tv on, so I can focus in some random show instead of thinking!

I do too, man. Then again, I'm pretty sure I have insomnia, which doesn't help my case.

I've been sleeping with the TV on so that the sounds can distract me from my thoughts. ><

[Espenoah]

I can join you. Except I'm doing nothing but laying here. What German band are you listening to?

[Nikolai_S]

Late night is when the worst dysphoria has struck for me, from when I was 12 onwards. Even if it eased for a while, I went into denial and everything, it would be 3 am with full force insomnia, and I'd feel really, really dysphoric. I think you're more aware of your body when you're trying to relax. Especially if you're failing.

Actually, my worst memories of dysphoria take place between midnight and 4 am. I'd get these episodes which were so... psychotic. Sleep deprived and frustrated, struggling with denial, socially isolated... I'd practically lose my mind. I'd go into detail, but... no one wants to hear about that crap. Plus it's probably triggering in a million different ways.

[Tad]

yep. Think it's cuz I'm tired and worn down after the day, my defences are at a weak point. Plus there are activites associated with evening.. that can also bring on dysphoria.

[Lee]

Yeah, there are some nights when I have to get up and put my binder back on in order to get to sleep.

[some ftm guy]

agreed, it's terrible at night because i can't bind or pack all night, my chest gets in the way too and i bump it while moving around, drives me crazy. i don't want to brake my packer and i know if i wear my binder it'll be aching sooo bad either throughout the night and won't sleep or all day next day. i don't even want to toy with the idea of sleeping in it. don't want to injure myself where i have breathing troubles. it just feels too weird in both places right after getting them off.

[Espenoah]

The chest certainly does get in the way, doesn't it? Too bad it's horribly uncomfortable to sleep in a binder (yet I've done it way too many times to count). I'd like to be able to sleep on my tummy one day without huge boobs getting all up in my face.

[Mr.Rainey]

I don't usually have stuff like that late at night. I know that my panic disorder keeps me up at night sometimes. I just find something to do that occupies my mind fully. Or I find some good porn and jack off till I get good and sleepy.

[El Capitan]

I'm not strictly a trans-guy (I identify more as GQ but who knows what might happen in the future!) but I also get this late night dysphoria you speak of. I don't bind though (God knows I've tried with shop bought bandages) as I've only just got to this level of dysporia but it is horrible and I also lay awake at night because of thinking about it and other things.

I'm clinically depressed too which probably doesn't help

[JerkBoy]

Because the binder compresses too drastically and isn't recommended to be worn during sleep, I just went out and bought a high-strength sports bra. Although buying it in that section is painful, it was worth it to me. It keeps my chest just compressed enough to feel secure, but not so much that it causes any discomfort the next day. I'd suggest that to try an ease your tensions.

As far as packers go, I'd agree that you should be careful about damaging it. Maybe make one just for sleeping, so you don't damage the one you bought.

[VanOcc]

Late night dysphoria is ->-bleeped-<-. Sports bras are a good way around that.. but I dunno, it sucks but you should give yourself a break from binding every now and then. Maybe try meditation or reassuring yourself that you're working towards a solution and sometimes it's just gonna be ->-bleeped-<-.

[Aikotribs]

agreed.

Gets even more 'fun' with the insomnia. I have to dig into the med box just to calm it down sometimes 

[spacepilot]

I can relate to this so much... I absolutely hate that I can't bind 24 hours a day. Even laying on my side I feel my female chest pulling at me, thanks to gravity and a body I never asked for. It's like I'm constantly aware of my breasts and when they're bound it's like my dysphoria instantly drops about 50%.

The worst is when I first come home in the evening and undress. My mirror hangs on the closet door in the main hallway of my studio apartment, and every time I want to go into the kitchen/bathroom I'm basically forced to look at it unless I cover it with scarf or something. So I basically see myself unbound far too often for my own comfort when I'm just lounging around my apartment. I'd bind at home as well if it weren't so potentially hazardous to my health wearing it as often as I'd like.

bleh. I don't even like talking about it any more haha.

Best of luck -hug-

[N.Chaos]

I definitely get it bad at night, mainly because everyone's asleep, I've got no cable and little to nothing to get my mind off it. Worst for me though is in the shower, doesn't matter what time of day. Anytime I'm naked I just feel like running off into traffic.