My wife and I separated our finances years ago. It has really helped things. She also told me if I'm going to get any surgeries done I have to pay for them myself.
Just remember it's your body, not your partner's.
One thing I've quickly learned is that we are much harsher critics of ourselves than others. You may not need FFS and pass just fine. Maybe your voice is giving you away? I'd get other inputs before I took that leap.
Being with my spouse is slowing my transition down but I'm very grateful for that. Things are happening at a pace that allows us both time to adjust and also forces me to think about my choices (in a good way). I choose to stay with her and work on our relationship, as does she, and it's the hardest thing I've ever done. She doesn't like all of the changes that I'm making but realizes that she can't tell me what to do with my body just as I can't tell her.
Talk to your partner about these things. I'm willing to bet that your partner doesn't want you to get FFS because their afraid.
I hope this helps.
