Is there anything anyone can say...

[Dominick_81]

 to help me get comfortable with the downstairs growth? As most of you know this is the biggest thing that's scaring me from getting on T. It's why I keep putting T off.  I've tried so hard to get myself comfortable with it and I just can't seem to. I've looked at pics, and sometimes the pics freak me out. I wanna get on T so bad. I've been so depressed that I can't even do my exercises, and I look in the mirror and I just wanna die b/c I'm overweight and female. I'm only eating one meal a day and I'm still gaining weight, which depresses me real bad. I'm thinking once I get on T, I'll loose weight and feel better about myself.

I'm just so frustrated, I just wanna die and my mom doesn't make it any easier when she makes me feel guilty telling me I don't want you to change. I'm also putting off T to make my mom happy, meanwhile, I'm dying inside and I just can't take it no more. If I get on T I gotta live with my mom crying all the time. I can't do it anymore. I just can't. I can't keep pretending everything is okay when it's not. If I don't get my T shot tomorrow like I plan, I'm gunna be cutting up my arm and my stomach to where I'm covered in blood.

I'm sorry for this post, I'm just so frustrated, I can't live like this another day.

[xAndrewx]

Dude I just look at it like "the growth may not be a penis but it's at least something." I'm more comfortable with my genitals now because it just looks more right. I don't know what to tell you about that =/

You have to live life for you. Does your mom have to live with your body? No, so please don't let her stop you from doing what you need to do. T probably won't help you loose weight but I've lost weight after starting T because I'm more comfortable in my body so I want to work out because I want to look better. Don't cut, what does it really resolve other than leaving marks? Just get your shot man. Sorry if this came off sounding mean. I didn't mean it that way...

[Dominick_81]

Hey Andrew, it didn't come off as mean. 

I dunno I guess I'm scared b/c people are saying the downstairs growth is uncomfortable. The thought of something sticking out down there, freaks me out. Or if I touch it, it's gunna hurt or when I walk it's gunna be a discomfort or maybe hurt, I dunno, and I'm also gunna feel something down there when I'd rather feel nothing like I do now. I don't want to notice the growth. I don't even want to know that it's growing. I just wanna get on T and have everything downstairs feel like it feels now... normal, no discomfort.

I know I shouldn't let my mom stop me, but she is. She's part of the problem. If I can get over the downstairs growth  issues first, I'll be able to get over issues with my mom not wanting me to get on T.  I really want to get my shot tomorrow, but with my fears of the downstairs growth, I probably shouldn't get on T until I'm comfortable with it. But I need to get on T.

[Elijah3291]

would you rather be uncomfortable with your whole body (being without T) or would you rather be more comfortable with your body, but uncomfortable with your growing dick?

the way I see it, i'm sure (correct me if i'm wrong) you don't really like your genitals as they are anyway, so wouldn't you rather be a little more uncomfortable with them, or completely miserable?

you cant get one thing and not another, sure I don't wanna go bald, but chances are I may, and that's just something I am willing to live with.

I didn't really feel any discomfort when I grew (which hasn't been too much growth yet)  it didn't hurt either.

chances are you will turn out to like the growth, sure.. maybe you wont, but in my experience I am a lot happier with my genitals because I can feel myself being erect now, it makes me feel like more of a man, I feel like I can understand my arousal better.

Have you ever gone onto xtube and seen videos of transguys genitals?

as for your mom, i cant really help you there, ive always been a selfish person, i believe in survival of the fittest, i need to do what I need to do to survive and be happy, i am the only one that knows the right decisions for me.  and if my mom were your mom, i would simply tell her "look mom, I love you, but this is something I need to do, you cant stop it or change it, just accept me for who i am, or we will have to go our separate ways, even if I don't want that to happen"

[Dominick_81]

would you rather be uncomfortable with your whole body (being without T) or would you rather be more comfortable with your body, but uncomfortable with your growing dick?

I'm not sure. I just wanna be comfortable all over.

the way I see it, i'm sure (correct me if i'm wrong) you don't really like your genitals as they are anyway, so wouldn't you rather be a little more uncomfortable with them, or completely miserable?

I dunno. I just want to be comfortable.  I just want a real penis that I stand up and pee through.

I didn't really feel any discomfort when I grew (which hasn't been too much growth yet)  it didn't hurt either.

But did you notice or feel that is was growing? That's good it didn't hurt.

you cant get one thing and not another, sure I don't wanna go bald, but chances are I may, and that's just something I am willing to live with.

I don't wanna go bald either. I'm gunna make sure I don't go bald.

chances are you will turn out to like the growth, sure.. maybe you wont, but in my experience I am a lot happier with my genitals because I can feel myself being erect now, it makes me feel like more of a man, I feel like I can understand my arousal better.

It's possible I can turn out to like it. I'm not sure yet.

Have you ever gone onto xtube and seen videos of transguys genitals?

No, I'm afraid of my mom seeing that I went on there and I know she would be upset and take away the computer like I'm a little kid, cause she wants to get rid of the computer now b/c I'm on it way too much. I'll try and see if I can get it on my ipod.

[Brent123]

If you have google chrome then you can do what's called incognito. Basically that means that "Pages you view in this window won't appear in your browser history or search history, and they won't leave other traces, like cookies, on your computer after you close the incognito window. Any files you download or bookmarks you create will be preserved, however" that's quoted from the server.

That's what I looked at to help me when I was 1st realizing I was trans.

[Elijah3291]

But did you notice or feel that is was growing? That's good it didn't hurt.


No, I'm afraid of my mom seeing that I went on there and I know she would be upset and take away the computer like I'm a little kid, cause she wants to get rid of the computer now b/c I'm on it way too much. I'll try and see if I can get it on my ipod.

if your ipod gets internet that should be completely possible, do you want me to find you a link so you dont have to search through a bunch of crappy videos while on the tiny ipod screen?

and no I couldn't feel it growing, the only thing I felt was that sometimes my boxers felt like I had a frontal wedgie and I just had to pull them down to be more comfortable

if you want to PM me with awkward or personal questions, you can ask me, I don't get weirded out by personal questions and i can answer honestly

[Dominick_81]

Thanks Brent123 

i may have mentioned this before but the downstairs growth used to really freak me out too...hell, when i'm overaroused NOW, not on t, my genitals ache.

but i hear overwhelmingly that it gets to be normal and doesn't bother you after a few months or so. and i don't think it's painful, just...noticeable. but like elijah said, having erections has gotta feel good.

have you considered the gel? i know it is more expensive but i myself have been strongly considering it because of the mood stability issue. changes are a bit slower, maybe more easy to handle if you're uneasy?

That sucks your genitals ache after being over aroused.

I would have to wait a few months to get comfortable? I wanna be comfortable right away.

Yeah, I wanted to do the gel but it cost $300 a month and I can't afford that. The gel might have been better b/c of the slow changes.

I hear so many different things about downstairs growth and I don't know what it's going to be like with me. Everyone is different. One guy told me you don't even notice it's there unless you feel around down there.  Then other people say they feel it or feel it growing... I dunno. I guess I gota get the shot and see for myself.

I told my mom I was getting my shot tomorrow and she didn't say anything, she just walked away. I don't think she really believes me when I say I'm getting my shot. I just don't know if I'm prepared for all the crying that is about to come.

if your ipod gets internet that should be completely possible, do you want me to find you a link so you dont have to search through a bunch of crappy videos while on the tiny ipod screen?

and no I couldn't feel it growing, the only thing I felt was that sometimes my boxers felt like I had a frontal wedgie and I just had to pull them down to be more comfortable

if you want to PM me with awkward or personal questions, you can ask me, I don't get weirded out by personal questions and i can answer honestly

A link would be great, thanks. 

Thanks. I will PM you, I got another question that I don't want to ask on here.

[Sharky]

Make a list of pros and cons. If the pros outnumber the cons start T. If you're overweight pre T you will be overweight post T. Skipping meals doesn't help. If you want a better body and keep it, you will need to make lifestyle changes. It's not like you are going to get instant growth as soon as you get the shot. Did you feel your body growing during your first puberty? You may not even notice much at all after your first shot. No one is 100% comfortable with themselves. Trans or not, we all have things we don't like about our bodies. Unless there is some amazing medical breakthrough, you will never have a standard issue body. You have to decide if you rather live with what you have now, or if you are want to get your body as close as you can to the mental image of yourself.

[Dominick_81]

as for your mom, i cant really help you there, ive always been a selfish person, i believe in survival of the fittest, i need to do what I need to do to survive and be happy, i am the only one that knows the right decisions for me.  and if my mom were your mom, i would simply tell her "look mom, I love you, but this is something I need to do, you cant stop it or change it, just accept me for who i am, or we will have to go our separate ways, even if I don't want that to happen"

I tell my mom this all the time, that I have to do this, but she keeps telling me the same thing over and over again or she just walks away from it. I'm the kind of person where I would have to sacrifice my happiness for someone else. But I'm to the point where I can't do it anymore. If I ever want to move forward in my life, this is something I have to do.

Make a list of pros and cons. If the pros outnumber the cons start T. If you're overweight pre T you will be overweight post T. Skipping meals doesn't help. If you want a better body and keep it, you will need to make lifestyle changes. It's not like you are going to get instant growth as soon as you get the shot. Did you feel your body growing during your first puberty? You may not even notice much at all after your first shot. No one is 100% comfortable with themselves. Trans or not, we all have things we don't like about our bodies. Unless there is some amazing medical breakthrough, you will never have a standard issue body. You have to decide if you rather live with what you have now, or if you are want to get your body as close as you can to the mental image of yourself.

I can remember complain my body was hurting, and my mom telling me it was growing pains. So I think I actually did experience some growing pains. But not much since I'm really short.

But if I get on T it will be easier for me to loose weight if I get on the treadmill 3 to 5 times a week, right? As far as my eating habits go, there not the greatest, but I don't eat a whole lot. I just have a sucky metabolism.

I've seen some guys slim way down once they got on T and they said it was easier for them to loose weight since being on T.

[xAndrewx]

Just wanted to point out that even some of the best personal fitness trainers in the world say you need to eat often just in small portions to boost your metabolism. Eating only once a day will make your body think it is being "starved" so it will hold onto more of the fat and such when you eat.

Also testosterone will make it easier to increase your muscle mass and muscle burns off fat quicker than some other things.

[Elijah3291]

I tell my mom this all the time, that I have to do this, but she keeps telling me the same thing over and over again or she just walks away from it. I'm the kind of person where I would have to sacrifice my happiness for someone else. But I'm to the point where I can't do it anymore. If I ever want to move forward in my life, this is something I have to do.

then now is the time to do it.  think of it like with a child, if a parent tells a child something, they have to go through with it, otherwise its just words

[Dominick_81]

Just wanted to point out that even some of the best personal fitness trainers in the world say you need to eat often just in small portions to boost your metabolism. Eating only once a day will make your body think it is being "starved" so it will hold onto more of the fat and such when you eat.

Also testosterone will make it easier to increase your muscle mass and muscle burns off fat quicker than some other things.

My mom tells me that all the time. I just go to bed so late (been going to bed by like 4 to 5am) so I get up really late and don't eat breakfast.

I know I gota stop with eating only one meal a day, I just wanna loose weight. I feel like I've tried everything and nothing works. But if I can get a good sleeping pattern going on, I can get up early enough to eat breakfast in the morning.

then now is the time to do it.  think of it like with a child, if a parent tells a child something, they have to go through with it, otherwise its just words

I'm gunna try again to get my shot tomorrow.  I just gota go for it.

[Bahzi]

But if I get on T it will be easier for me to loose weight if I get on the treadmill 3 to 5 times a week, right? As far as my eating habits go, there not the greatest, but I don't eat a whole lot. I just have a sucky metabolism.

I've seen some guys slim way down once they got on T and they said it was easier for them to loose weight since being on T.

Maybe, but plenty of guys gain weight on T as well.  It's not really a metabolism booster.   As Andrew said, it's easier to build muscle on T, which helps to burn fat, but you won't gain muscle without work either.  I've watched a lot of Youtube videos or guys' transitions as well as read plenty of posts here on the subject, and it would seem that the guys who slimmed down were either already at a healthy weight and lost the typical 'female pattern' fat on their hips, butt, and thighs (women tend to have a higher body fat percentage), or they were working out a lot, and usually strength training and not just cardio.   T is not a weight loss drug, and without changing diet habits, it's quite possible that you'll actually gain weight, I've seen a lot of that on Youtube too. 

[Dominick_81]

Maybe, but plenty of guys gain weight on T as well.  It's not really a metabolism booster.   As Andrew said, it's easier to build muscle on T, which helps to burn fat, but you won't gain muscle without work either.  I've watched a lot of Youtube videos or guys' transitions as well as read plenty of posts here on the subject, and it would seem that the guys who slimmed down were either already at a healthy weight and lost the typical 'female pattern' fat on their hips, butt, and thighs (women tend to have a higher body fat percentage), or they were working out a lot, and usually strength training and not just cardio.   T is not a weight loss drug, and without changing diet habits, it's quite possible that you'll actually gain weight, I've seen a lot of that on Youtube too.

Weight gain for me would not be good. It will only make me more depressed as I'm already extremely depressed about my weight, and I have a hip problem called congenital hips which weight gain wouldn't be good for that. So I dunno. I just can't gain weigh, that would be a really bad thing for me.

[Nero]

I think I actually gained weight on T. It's coming off now as I work out more though.
But dude, I'm just going to be honest - if a little genital growth is a deal breaker, then T probably isn't for you.

[insideontheoutside]

I think I actually gained weight on T. It's coming off now as I work out more though.
But dude, I'm just going to be honest - if a little genital growth is a deal breaker, then T probably isn't for you.

I'd tend agree ... but I also think that there are other issues you need to sort though first, just judging by your other posts. The T will be there if you go that route but if you're not cool with all the "side effects" you should wait a little while longer.

[Dominick_81]

I think I actually gained weight on T. It's coming off now as I work out more though.
But dude, I'm just going to be honest - if a little genital growth is a deal breaker, then T probably isn't for you.

I'd tend agree ... but I also think that there are other issues you need to sort though first, just judging by your other posts. The T will be there if you go that route but if you're not cool with all the "side effects" you should wait a little while longer.

I'm getting myself more comfortable with the growth. In my mind I tend to make things a lot worse when really it's not as bad as I thought it would be.

As for weight gain... I'm trying to look at it as it depends on the person. Once I get on T I'm going to dedicate myself  to working out at least 3 to 5 times a week  for 30 minutes cause I do not want to gain weight. 

[Heath]

Have you ever gone onto xtube and seen videos of transguys genitals?

Whoa. A little off-topic, but I'd never heard of that website before until now and so I went browsing around and totally saw one of my friends on there.  It's a small world! 

To the original poster:  They say that most of the growth happens in the first few months....well, I'm about to get my fourth shot tomorrow and all I've honestly been noticing is just a heightened....sensation.  Wouldn't call it painful at all.  It's just more of a physical sensation which then translates to a mental state of "oh man, I need to wank now!"  Whether that sensation means that it's actually growing or not is beyond me.  But nah...no pain.  Least not yet....?

[JohnR]

OP, I can't believe anyone prescribed you T. Either you weren't completely honest with them or they didn't bother going trough the therapy stage with you.

If even the possibility of some genital growth is enough to stop you taking T, then you should never have even considered it in the first place.