Planning first outing

[Rachael]

Hi, i was just after some advice for my upcomeing debut.

a good gg friend and i are planning to go to my universities lgbt club night (of which i am a lgbt officer) and aside from her wanting us to WALK! down to it, i so dont know whats a good idea to wear? uber conservative? or what? im so confused, i know im not showing cleaveage, so a roll neck knit top is on the cards methinks, but skirt or jeans? flats or low heals? arg, its so confuseing, and i dont know how i should behave? uber shy? do i use the ladies room? etc? this probably sounds so newbie but im worried and want to pass my best...
(nukeing eyebrows as i type)

[Melissa]

Hehe, judging by your picture, I would say you probably won't have too much problem passing.  You may go down to that area and observe what the women are typically wearing if you are unsure.  I would just say wear what you are comfortable wearing.  For some MTFs it's strictly jeans until they build up confidence, but if you look good in a skirt and feel comfortable wearing it, then you could do that too.  As to the ladies room, if you are trying to present as female and you are in the midst of people who already know you're transgendered, then it probably would be just fine using it.

Melissa

[Rachael]

8 people there will know im T (rest of the comittee) members think im gay at the moment.
Im thinking either jeans, or a skirt with the black footless tights which are very popular in the cold winter months... so ill see. I want a nice looking outfit really, but i know i cant show cleavage which cuts out a lot of stuff around my age group, and tight tees arnt the way forward ><

[Melissa]

I would avoid too much tight clothing unless you have a nice figure.  There ARE some tricks with tape that cross dressers do if you are really wanting to show cleavage though.  As for the footless tights, I remember back when they were popular in the late eighties and I remember wishing I was female at that time and I would have worn them, but now that I'm living fulltime as female the idea of having my feet freeze in the winter just doesn't sound very appealing to me.  I just wear the footed ones now.

Melissa

[Rachael]

might look into the cleavage thing, i mean, i have small breasts now, its just they look rubbish

[Buffy]

Hi Rachael,

Sounds like a great first place to go on an outing.

Advice... Enjoy yourself, wear what ever you feel comfortable in and have a good time!

Be yourself, hold your head up high and let Rachael develop.

Buffy

[Steph]

I have to agree with Buffy, Rachael.

The important thing is for you to be able to relax and have a good time so wear clothing that you are not going to have to worry about.  Personally the key is to be able to blend in with the others.  You are not there to make a statement like "woohoo look at me", you are there to enjoy yourself and have a good time.

Wear comfortable clothing that is obviously female, clothing that you are not going to have to worry about while you're wearing it.  Short skirts would put too much pressure on you concentrating sitting like a woman and not revealing tomorrows laundry etc. so I would opt for pants or jeans, a casual top, that is not too revealing especially if you don't have that much to reveal, and go from there.  Unless "everyone" knows who you are if you are presenting as a woman then you are going to have to use the women's washroom to avoid possible embarrassing situations.

The important issue is to be comfortable, and enjoy yourself, don't put needless pressure on yourself, have fun, cause the next time will be even better.

Steph

[Rachael]

Well sitting and skirts arnt an issue for that reason, i almost always cross my legs sitting. So im considering mildly conservative atire for a club. I personally want to use the womens room anyway, im just worried about the butch dyke that trys to pick a fight if she realises...

[KarenLyn]

Well sitting and skirts arnt an issue for that reason, i almost always cross my legs sitting. So im considering mildly conservative atire for a club. I personally want to use the womens room anyway, im just worried about the butch dyke that trys to pick a fight if she realises...

If she doesn't know what the t in gblt means, maybe it's time to educate her. I can't imagine anyone at such a meeting could be too closed minded.

Karen Lyn   

[Rachael]

like i said, less of a meeting, more an alcohol fueled gay party
thier likely to recognise me anyway (im on the lgbt comittee)

[passiflora]

Thats might actually be good for you for the first time, becasue it may eleviate a lot of pressure. My first outing was similar, me and a friend went to a haloween party that was mostly Gay and otherwise gender variant, a lot of people their new me, so I did not feel that nervous. I mean honestly in my mind, I did want to pass for female and I was trying to look my best, but at the same time, it was a load off to know that just in case people their knew me and it was a friendly crowd so I could relax and have fun. We went as ken and barbie, we made the boxes and everything and just had our hands and feet hanging out, it was really fun.

But genearllly though like in other everyday places, I just obsreved what other girls around me were wearing that were my age and just tried to blend in the best I could. I've always been a bit self cinscience anyway, but I never wanted to stand out that much, just look ordinary. So just find a style that you are comfortable with, and one that matches your personality. As you transition, you will find a style that suits you.

Have fun on your nite out and be safe

-pass- 

[Krisstina]

Wow you look great it was hard for me to imagine this is one of your first outings. Everyone is right you have to dress comfortable and this should be a fun time for you.

Trust me your ok, if you seen me the first time out you would know that!   My now mother in law did my hair looked like an afro, I did my makeup (used a sponge), wore heels and lepard print dress and I was doing my best at the time.  I will never forget that night.

Now I dress appropriate for the event, my age, and shape  >. I think you will do the same most women do.

Have fun
Kristina

[Maud]

I never had a problem with the bulldyke types, they're some of my best friends though the ones I'm out to I explained things to pretty quickly (this was pre transition) and they were ok with it and the ones I'm not out to have no idea so it's a non issue. Though I still just avoided using public toilets until I knew no one would read me in one, while wanting to not have to worry about it you have to respect the privacy of womens spaces, if I saw someone who was abiguously a crossdresser or a transexual early in transition in the ladies now I'd feel deep down more than a little invaded however much I feel for other trans people. it's easier said than done, I'm perfectly capable of not drinking and theirfor not peeing so I first used the ladies about three weeks after going FT and I didn't use the mens room once in that time.