I've been meaning to ask this for a while, because I really haven't heard anyone talk about it before.
But, well, is it possible for HRT to actually make your sensory input better?
At first, I thought that this must just be my mind playing tricks on me, that it must just be because of me seeing things that weren't there, or as the placebo effect of the initial euphoria of HRT, but as I've progressed on HRT this change has only gotten more and more pronounced. And although the euphoria has gone away, as have just about every single other one of the "placebo effect" effects, this one hasn't, and in fact has only gotten better and better as time has gone on. And I know this might sound crazy, but I'm 100% serious about this, so bear with me. I genuinely am starting to feel like my senses have gotten better since I started HRT.
And I'm not just talking about olfactory senses, like it's been reported that women experience more strongly than men. I mean EVERYTHING. Vision, touch, hearing, smell, and taste.
(continue reading if you want to hear about my real-life examples which are making me believe that this isn't just in my head. Otherwise, feel free to skip the rest of this post.)
Today when I was out walking, just looking at the blue sky and the green grass, and the animals in the Cleveland Metroparks, it seriously just felt like the entire world was in high-definition in a way that it has never been before. For some reason, the colors seem more vivid. And there's just this deep profound emotional reaction of "Oh my God, this is SO BEAUTIFUL!" just from looking at the colors of everything that really wasn't there before. And I seriously do not think I'm making this up. I've become much better at being able to see the entire road when I'm driving. I can see the road, and see all the cars around me, and see the road signs, all at once, and it's all very obvious, and in complete high-definition, rather than having what I'd describe as tunnel-vision, where I could really only focus on one thing at a time. And I've noticed this at work also. I'm a poker dealer, so at any given time my attention has to be extremely divided, between keeping track of the actions of the players, plus taking the rake from each pot, plus making change from the table's chip rack when necessary. Before HRT, I seriously could not do it. One of my biggest problems was that when I turned my focus down toward the chip rack to make change or take the rake, I'd lose track of the action. People would be checking and betting, and I wouldn't even be able to see it, and the table would be waiting on me to deal the next card but I wouldn't have seen that everyone had acted already. Where now, that never happens anymore. I can be looking down at my chip rack and still see all of the action going on at the table completely perfectly.
I seriously believe that my hearing has gotten better. Before HRT, I could pretty much zone out just about anything. I slept through a tornado once. Where now sometimes the tiniest little noises, like water dripping outside my window, or my roommate quietly slipping the mail underneath my door, can bother me. I never used to notice when people were sniffling and coughing, while now every single time I sit next to a fat guy at the poker table I can seriously hear him sniffling and wheezing and coughing at just about every second, and it really annoys me because it sounds gross and unhealthy.
I feel like my sense of smell has gotten better. My (female) roommate always complains about how our cats smell like poop sometimes when they jump up on us after using the litter box. I could never smell it before HRT. Now I can.
My sense of taste has DEFINITELY gotten better. Or at least my emotional reactions to certain tastes. I've always loved food, but now there is REALLY a sense of that kind of "foodgasm," where when you eat something exceptionally delicious, it just makes your entire body feel like it's coursing with the most amazing pleasure imaginable. (Chocolate seems to be the main culprit.
But even simple things like grilled bratwursts, or caramelized onions, or pizza, they just generate this deep internal feeling of "OMG this is SO delicious!" that, while still there before, was nowhere near as strong.)
And finally, my sense of touch has just absolutely exploded. Now when other poker dealers tap me on the shoulder to send me to my break, I can actually often tell who it is just by what they feel like. I can feel whether their hands are soft or rough, I can feel how strong the person is by how hard they tap their hand on me, I can almost instantly tell whether they are male or female just by the skin texture. Seriously. Now whenever I touch someone, or whenever they touch me, it just really feels like it's in high definition. Like when I touch the arm of a hairy guy, it's like I can feel every single hair, and when I hug someone I can just feel every inch of their arms around me rather than just a vague sense of pressure. And I've especially noticed that my sensitivity has GREATLY increased. When my cats jump on me now, it actually very commonly hurts just because certain parts of my skin have become so sensitive, and the pressure of their weight actually kind of hurts. And going back to the whole "other dealers tapping me on the shoulder" thing, I never used to get hurt by any degree of tapping, no matter how hard. Where now there's probably at least once or twice a day where I have to say "ow!" because someone tapped my shoulder too hard. And I've actually had to explain to them, "I'm really sensitive. So don't tap me any harder than you'd tap a girl." And, well, touching myself pretty much anywhere on my body now feels completely unbelievable, where before it didn't really do much for me.
Am I going crazy here? Or could this really be happening as a side-effect of HRT? I'm 100% serious, it almost feels like my entire body, including my brain and my very sensory perception, was designed to run on estrogen from the start. And it's only starting to work right now that I finally have it. It seriously just suddenly feels like the entire world is in high-definition. And it's only been getting better and better with every single week. Seriously. Every single week I feel like I'm seeing better, hearing better, smelling better, tasting better, and feeling better. Is this even possible? As far as I've known, I've never heard of anyone getting this kind of effect.
Anyone else? Maybe? Any thoughts?
-Carrie
