Advice on dealing with rollarcoaster emotions

[inlove@20]

So im posting this one in hopes getting some kind of advice to cope with the variety of emotions im getting from my boyfriend. He's coming up on his one year mark of being on T (in april I think) and I'm going crazy. I've been researching and talking to other ftm's that have already been on T for a few years to see how long the sense of immaturity lasts because I can't handle it anymore. My boyfriend and I have a long distance relationship to begin with because I'm in nor cal for school, and he lives in so cal. Sometimes I want to have a serious or mature conversation because I just want to get his point of view on something or I just want him to be there for me. But when I do this I feel he doesn't want to listen or he just makes immature jokes and changes the subject. He is my first love and I really can't imagine being without him but I can't handle his immaturity anymore. I finally get to go home and see him next weekend for a few days and I'm afraid of going. Does anyone have any suggestions?

(sry for somewhat ranting but like I said, im going crazy)

[spacial]

From what you describe, you seem to be having a pretty major problem.

Do you think you can live with his 'immaturity'?

[inlove@20]

Normally we have no problems. But when he gets in this mode I dont feel I can talk to him. Part of me thinks this is bothering so much because I'm so busy with school and work.

[VeryGnawty]

Immature behavior isn't caused by T....

[spacial]

inlove.

I finally get to go home and see him next weekend for a few days and I'm afraid of going . Does anyone have any suggestions?

I'm sorry, but this really says it all.

[Ruby]

"Part of me thinks this is bothering so much because I'm so busy with school and work"

It seems like that to me; perhaps anyway, you are just getting caught up in your own anxiety and he doesn't know how to deal with it.

Try to just stay with your breath, or focus on something positive; stay in the moment and see what happens when you see him. You need to talk with him about your perception of his being immature, but you should do that in person. It will be a tricky one.

I have to sign off now. Good luck.
Love,
Ruby