Weird court experience

[tvc15]

Today I went to court for my name change. The judge asked my address and how long I'd been living in this state, and then he asked why I moved here. I'm living with my dad because he's more accepting of my transition, but I didn't want to bring that up because I think that's personal information. So I gave a vague but still honest answer. Then he expressed confusion over my gender, asking what the deal was by going from a female name to a male name. For the next ten minutes he threw a whole bunch of questions at me about my gender identity, therapy sessions, etc. Like this:

Judge: You were born female? (yes) And you've been female all your life? (yes) Are you a female at present? (yes)
(A few minutes later)
Me: ...and so I'm in therapy in order to get a letter for hormone surgery, which will make my appearance more in line with my identity.
Judge: So what IS your identity?
Me: I'm male.
Judge: You think you're male, or you are male?
Me: I'm male.
Judge: Can you explain that? You said you've felt this way all your life. As a child, why did you decide you were male if you have a female body?

I was just really confused. I was under the impression you just walked in, answered a few reasonable questions so they know you're not trying to evade the law or something and that's it. I wasn't prepared to answer questions like a therapist would ask. I mean, it takes a long time to talk about your past.

Then he said "This is a strange case... not because of the gender stuff, but you say you're 18 and a half and you look much younger than that."

This stuff just kept blowing my mind, I thought it was obvious that because I'm female-bodied I'm going to look young. He said that he'd look at my ID, and "hopefully," if it matched who I was, then he'd grant the name change. I don't see why he didn't believe my age, but I showed him my ID, and he signed off on the papers. I had stated I wanted my birth certificate amended, but he checked the box not to amend it. I don't really care because nobody sees your birth certificate anyway, but wow. That whole experience was really disheartening.

What I'm wondering: Is this normal? Was the judge overstepping, or am I taking this all the wrong way? As long as my name is changed I'm fine, but I hope this isn't something people typically experience.

[Lee]

Yeah, that's way more of a headache than I would have expected.  At least it's over for you now.  Here's hoping things are a little simpler here.

[Robert Scott]

Technically the judge can ask any questions he wants to when your in his court room.  If it had no bearing on your name change you didn't have to answer them.  It sounded more like his first experience with a transgender individual and was just trying to learn some about it. 

I would call his law clerk and ask to get clarification as to why your birth certificate was not allowed to be changed - it might have just been a simple over sight. 

[cynthialee]

My experiance was nothing like this.
Your judge is only satisfying his curiosity.
Also, I would wager that he was uncomfortable changing the name of such a transyouth young person and he was looking for a way out.

[MaxAloysius]

Wow, what an ordeal! Do you guys really have to go and see a judge to get your name changed?! Also, he totally sounds like a prick, to me anyway. There's no way I would have answered questions like that; waaaay too probing.

Here all I had to do was go online and print off a form, get my parents to sign it (because I was under eighteen at the time) and take it into the office of Births, Deaths and Marriages. The person behind the counter took the form, stamped it and told me it would take five business days to be processed, end of ordeal. There was a woman over eighteen at the counter beside me doing the same thing, her forms were just the same minus the parent's signatures.

They also automatically issue you a new birth certificate here, so mine now says my new name on the front, and has a small note on the back mentioning that my name was changed on ---- date. That he refused to issue you a new certificate makes your whole ordeal even worse, I'm not sure what I'd do if forced to go through the same thing

[Randy]

I see from your profile that we live in the same city - that's crazy! My experience was waaaaaayyy different. I got this wonderful female judge who was super nice. She asked why I was changing it, then made some comment about how (I was changing from Alexandra to Alexander) I would still be Alex, right? and smiled. In and out.

This guy was definitely overstepping his boundaries. As for the birth certificate, I don't know anything about that. I don't recall there being anything on the forms about it, and I've never otherwise made an attempt to change it, so I would assume that it remains the same.

[tvc15]

Hah, the info in my profile is outdated, I don't live in Florida anymore. I kinda wish I could've stayed down there though; this would be much less likely to happen in my old city. Glad everything went smoothly for you.

Yeah Max, I guess every state does it differently. Your procedure sounds ideal. Wisconsin's is more of an ordeal; you have to publish your name change for three weeks in the paper before your court date, too...

I believe that I was probably the first trans person the guy had ever dealt with, and he was probably curious, but it's such a heavy subject for someone to grasp casually like that, you know? I wasn't there to educate anyone, and I sure wasn't going to accomplish anything like it in what should've been a five-minute case. I mean, I'm trans and I still had to read a lot to understand the difference between sex and gender and everything. To someone who's never questioned their gender, they're going to have an even harder time "getting it".

[gilligan]

I had stated I wanted my birth certificate amended, but he checked the box not to amend it. I don't really care because nobody sees your birth certificate anyway, but wow. That whole experience was really disheartening.

If you ever have to prove citizenship, you'll need to show you're birth certificate; you are from the States, right? Either that or naturalization papers if you're an immigrant. I had to show citizenship to be able to get my enhanced state ID (it's basically works as limited-purpose passport through the Western Hemisphere Travel Initiative). The only way I've got to show citizenship is my birth certificate. Just saying.