Reply to my post about going to therapy.

[Diane_2be]

Hi evryone,

thanks to those who replied to my post it was mosy certainly helpful. It help me think about a few things. Firstly i'm 35 years old. I've known pretty much my whole life that i would prefer to be in the body of a woman. I've let it frustrate for so long and it has only been in the last year or so i realised that i should do something about it. 5 to 10 years from now would i still want to transition 'YES'. Do i regret not transitioning sooner 'YES'.

I'm not afraid of talking to a therapist, i'm sure i would be open with them. I think i'm more afraid that once i start my secret will come out and i would have to face family and friends.

I'm not here replying to this post or have joined chat rooms because i'm inquisitive about people who transitioned, i'm here because i truly believe this is what i want and where i belong.

[LynnER]

Well, first off,  Welcome to susans

Secondly, your fear is reasonable, but you do have to look at this.... Are you willing to give up everything if necicary to transition.... Your friends, your family, your job.....  It dosnt allways happen but its a possability... Untill you give up the fear it will allways loom over your head like a dark cloud of dispair...

"You dont know... you dont know what you would give up... No-o-o you dont know what you will give up... you dont know, what you want... it may take you years to find out... you dont know , what you need... something that may never come to you....  (Chorous to Disconected by Face to Face)

If youve found out what you would and could give up to be you... by all means jump right in and go for it... you'll be a better stronger person for it.....  Just be ready and keep your head up   

Good luck  *Hugs*

[Steph]

Hi evryone,

...>

I'm not afraid of talking to a therapist, i'm sure i would be open with them. I think i'm more afraid that once i start my secret will come out and i would have to face family and friends.

I'm not here replying to this post or have joined chat rooms because i'm inquisitive about people who transitioned, i'm here because i truly believe this is what i want and where i belong.

Hey there Diane.

I would just like to reinforce that when you talk with a therapist the "only" way to be is open and honest otherwise there is no point to the therapy.  Also Diane there is a place for everyone here at Susan's, so yes you definitely belong here

Steph

[Melissa]

I'm not afraid of talking to a therapist, i'm sure i would be open with them. I think i'm more afraid that once i start my secret will come out and i would have to face family and friends.

Look at it this way.  In order to be fully living as a woman, they're going to have to find out anyways.  That how I see it anyways.  I actually think coming out is one of the most difficult parts of the transition (at least it was for me anyhow) and I wanted to get the hard stuff out of the way, so I actually was out to almost everyone within the first month of transitioning.  Looking back, I do wish I had waited until I had learned more so I could have addressed concerns and questions much better.

Melissa

[Kate]

Well, are you considering NOT doing this then to avoid coming out?

If not, then... it's inevitable at some point. BUT, it's not like you have to tell everyone right away. You can get into therapy first and sort everything out, make sure this IS what you want, THEN start planning coming out strategies. You can be months into HRT, have strangers occasionally read you as a female, and STILL those close to you (who see you often) might not notice. It took me a year+ from starting therapy to get to the point where I pretty much have to be coming out now. Everyone has a different experience of course though.

BUT, are you married? If so, and IMHO, she deserves to know (if she doesn't already) - and sooner rather than later.

Kate

[karmatic1110]

There came a time when I realized that no fear was worth me being unhappy for the rest of my life and to be honest with you I would have self destructed very soon.  I too was afraid of therapy for awhile until my "bell went off" but I just finished my first session with my therapist on 1/25 and I am SO glad I went!  She confirmed my GID because I was VERY open and literally told her everything I possibly could have.  It was probably the best day of my life!  I haven't cried tears of joy in forever   

Basically what I am saying is that there is nothing to be afraid of as far as therapy is concerned.  At the very least, you will come out with a better understanding of yourself.

Charlotte