just the clothing or more?

[lucaluca]

hey, i think you all enjoy it, when you are dressed as a female. you like what you see, you like the clothes, and everything else. but how do you know that there isn't more? how do you know that it is all about the few hours and after that you are back in your "normal" live. what makes you so sure that there isn't more?

[spacial]

Hmmmmm.

[VelindaSalazar]

lucaluca,

Some of us know that crossdressing is just a fetish.  The feeling of satisfaction and release are usually some big indicators that it is what it is.  For some of us, it is a testing of waters and confidence building to bridge our inner selves with our outward appearance.  There are those who know this, those who suspect, and those who do not.  We crossdress, in some ways, to find out.  What makes us sure there isn't more?  That's an individual question that requires time and experience to answer.

[Cindy]

Hi lucaluca,

I have never gained a sexual thrill from dressing as my gender. Yes I enjoy looking nice and wearing nice things but it emphasizes by femininity.  I enjoy shopping and looking at fashion etc but again it's part of my being female.

There are men who get great sexual enjoyment from wearing female clothing and there is nothing wrong with that at all. My understanding is that for many CD males the thrill disappears after an orgasm and they then wish to change their clothing to male.

I personally have no problems with this and I hope they enjoy themselves.

At Susan's we have the full spectra of people from ->-bleeped-<-s, to transsexuals and everything in between.  Many of us dislike the terms but they are useful in discussions.

Have a look around the posts and you may be surprised with the complexity of gender identification.

Hugs

Cindy

[michelle.ch]

I wasn't going to answer this post ten days ago, I had been asking myself the same question but had no answer for myself. Ten days later after a lot of thinking I can say that at least for me, there certainly seems to be something more going on, but I'm still not sure where it's going to lead.  The combination  of  the feeling of joy I got when I realised I was starting to look like Michelle even in man mode, the way I think and look at people when I go out, the way my sexual orientation has been orienting itself over the past six months - (not exactly shifting but a long term interest coming to the fore), and conversations and contact I have had with other t-people have started to give me the feeling I might be posting two forums down in a few years to come! 

[Amy85]

Well, I like to think it's all about the clothing for me but I'm not sure enough about myself or whatever to say that. I know that it started as just the clothing... well, I can sort of remember a few confusing thoughts and feelings before that (and after writing and rereading this post I am remembering quite a few...) but I think I burried those deep down because I was a boy and there was no sense in thinking about the impossible.
For the most part my experience has been entirely dressing up when alone, even to this day. Sure, I've taken false identities in chat rooms or video games or so forth during my teenage years just because something in me found it exciting; but in the end of the day I put away my one set of clothes and put on the other so I can resume my life. As long as I get my time to express "my other half" I feel ok. Sometimes the urges to dress are there during work or whatever but I can cope. I never really considered transitioning because I knew it just wasn't for me.

I say that because though I've had strong TS thoughts and feelings at times I'm pretty sure I can live my life just fine by getting those urges out of the way by dressing when nobody is around. The biggest clue is that I really have no problem with the body I was born with. Well, I wish I wasn't so pudgey and didn't have acne that persists past my teenage years... but yeah, I am comfortable being a male. Does that sound confusing? It should, it confuses the hell out of me  Being happy as a male and yet at times wanting nothing more in the universe than to wake up in the right body has it's way of making it hard to figure things out.

So... I doubt I am helping much in this conversation    In conclusion it's probably not all about the clothes for me, but I've decided that it is.

[SidESlicker]

Mrrrr.....

I don't know if I *don't* get a sexual thrill from cross dressing. I feel powerful and confident and sexy when I'm wearing my clothes, so my sex drive goes up. Whether that's indicative of a fetish or more, I don't know.

For me, the way I know that it's not more for now is that I can look at tomorrow and be okay with the fact that people aren't going to "he" me when they see me. Whether that's going to change next week, I don't know. I don't know who I'll be in a year or what I'll identify as.

Mind you, I'm nineteen, so this is all from a young'un perspective.

[Salina]

For me,  I suppose it could be more?  but for now, I will say its probably the clothing.  I don't get any sexual feelings when I wear them and it dosent matter wether its just wearing panties or a dress and heels.  However,  I do feel more emotionally good and happy when I am dressed, I am more relaxed and for some reason, it feels almost natural to me when I am dressed, wether it be just in panties or a dress and heels.  I like both sides of me, but given the option, I would more than likely be Salina most of the time.  No thoughts of transitioning though.

[another Robyn]

Until after my divorce, I had thought it was just the clothes and makeup.

Post divorce, I was able to dress as often as I wished, and that turned out to be any time I wasn't involved in earning a living. And my hunger kept growing.
More, more, I always wanted just a little more; something seemed to be missing, but I couldn't put my finger on it. I even began to self medicate, and it felt good, and I was getting "ma'amed" quite often, even though I was in drab, (musta been the hair. )

It all came to a screeching halt when my roommate packed up and moved to AZ. I moved back in with my elderly parents (I was in my early 40's at that point) who were far more ill than I'd suspected; they required as much time as I could find for them, and my dressing went by the wayside very abruptly.

I was amazed at how easily I shed my fem side, after three or four years of daily dressing, and now really question my original feelings. After my parents were dealt with, I packed up and moved out west to a small town, and resumed dressing, but no longer on a daily basis. After a couple years out there, I had a heart attack and a quad bypass; that pretty much killed my urges to dress.

Another move brought me to a place in isolation, with no neighbors, and no pavement, living in the woods. After ten years, my urges to cross-dress are almost completely gone, but I still think about it every day. Put me back in an urban environment, and I suspect I'd be out shopping within a couple weeks.