how many of you go out?

[Veronica Morph]

this tread is very useful and iteresting,

My first experience was a short walk in a lonely park then i repeated the same drill over and over, in a lonely street, a corporate building garden, a closed shopping center, all these were taking place during eiter very late at night or very early in the morning, the point or no point was to do it where it were no one present.

I thibnk i moved on the day i got the guts on going out on haloween, the way i did it was carefully planned, I think i put too much atention to the details, now i think i really exaggerated.

Then i keep doing my drills in lonely places again, same time schedule etc, i became a little boring to tell the truth.
I took the courage to dressup and make up and do all to be passable and walk a typical and famous promenade in downtown, Im sure i was not wearing a good make up nor i was passable, i did enjoy and many people stare at me, i must say all who ran into me during the stroll, i though that my level of satisfactioan was to be low, but in fact it made me repeat the drill 3 times more in a row of 3 consecutive days, until the last time i did it became odd and boring except for the walking around in my favorite boots.

Then I got the idea to go dressed to a xxx sex shop, I did the drill 4 times, the first 3 times were nice and i really enjoyed, the cashier was nice to me and other people were looking at me as if they wanted to talk to me, on the 4th visit i got a guy looking at me and following me and checking out what i was looking too, i felt very uncomfortable, I wasnt there to atract men, i felt i was giving the wrong message. It took time for me to dress again.

I got to dress again recently and that one could be the opening of a certifiable going out, i will open a new tread giving the story as the plan went well. In short words i did went out totally in public, but i planned to go with another CD we did a makeover and then went out to a lounge. the story isnt a comon story, take a look and comment once i publish it. FYI i got  even invited to post it on a famous TG magazine, and im still thinking to do it or not, just it need to correct some grammar.

I look forward for the next outing...again it will be a very creative one.

Dressing up never stops, it gets more and more creative.

[Cindy]

Hi Veronica,

Do be careful of where you go, there are predators out there.

What you also do to give yourself convidence is do go out in 'male' mode and do female stuff. I had my eyebrows shaped on Sunday, and she was great, very friendly we talked about TG people. At the end of it, she said she ran a large salon in a different shopping centre, for me to come around and she would give me a pedicure and medicure etc, very fancy booklet. And was totally open that Cindy was welcome at anytime. When she asked my name I had told her Cindy, she smiled in a very friendly way and always used it. Possibly more confidence building that going to sex shops . Shudder to think what could happen to you.

I have found acceptance every where. As long as you accept you.

Hugs

Cindy

[justmeinoz]

I have a week off and have been dressing as the real me all the time.
Yesterday I did the grocery shopping, and today had a Dentist appt, so outed myself there, she was great by the way, then had lunch and wandered around a local mall for an hour.  No problems at all. 
My therapist said yesterday that I had taken care with dressing, and had coordinated my outfit (Salvo chic) in a way that was age appropriate, suited the local area, and didn't stand out.
That seems to be the key to being able to merge into the environment.
Karen.

[Linsey]

Friends of mine offerred the use of their house in Las Vegas, to which I readily accepted. Since no one was going to be there when I arrived, I decided to travel and arrive en femme.
The trip is usually 4 hours long. I left home in the early evening and changed at the first safe stop in my SUV, something that I normally dont do, but I wanted to have as much 'dresstime' as possible.
There is always a lot of venue choices and I opted for the one based on privacy and safety.
I kept my attire simple and easy, undies, jeans, tee-shirt, sandals, hair in a ponytail, and light make-up. I strolled around for a few minutes to enjoy that feeling of freedom and independance, then returned to the highway.
After 2 hours of driving, I needed to stop and rest. After parking I got out and checked myself in the car windows, there was Linsey looking back at me. The gas mart was well lit and not busy. I strolled towards the side entrance,
closest to the restrooms. The door chimed as I smiled at the elder male attendant, he smiled back and went about his tidying up. The restrooms were the single use type, I was done and out in a few minutes.
I exited and a couple was in the store now, they only looked at me quickly as looked at them, I left the store and back to my car. Yes...there were some people around, but I didn't study them, and they did not study me.

90 minutes later, I was looking over the valley that contains the city of Las Vegas. From 15 miles away, Las Vegas is all lights, colors and huge shapes. No cost is spared in creating the mega-casinos, they tower on both sides of the highway as I pass through the 10 mile stretch of casinos, hotels, clubs, shopping and dining. One fellow was keeping alongside, obviously wanting a closer look, I smiled and merged onto my exit.
The house is in a modest suburban neighborhood several miles west of downtown. I parked in the driveway, it is nearly 11 pm.
Everything I needed was here, I made tea and listened to the radio, the yard is nicely landscaped, I spent a while sitting outside, enjoying the warm breeze and the overall quiet. I later fell asleep with the telelvision on.

Late in the morning, I made coffee and showered. I used this opportunity to launder my underthings. Everything was clean and fresh for tonight. I was in need of a new hairpiece and there are several well known and recomended places in Las Vegas,
one of them is Bare Essentials Fantasy Fashions on West Sahara Blvd.
This store is well known for its wide selection of fantasy wear and stage costumes. One section is devoted to hairpieces, make-up and other CD 'essentials'. The female sales clerk assisted me with sorting through the numerous hairpiece styles and colors. I decided on a dark brown shoulder length with some highlights, the cut is tappered and layered around the face and the back. I had almost purchased a solid brown with bangs, but the other choice looked more appealing to me by the styling. I paid and tipped the salesgirl, I don't think she expected that but I appreciated her help. At a drugstore I bought a skin cleanser and a deeper shade for my lips.
My next stop was for jeans, a blouse and shoes. I immediately found a perfect pair of Levis boot cut jeans that I tried on along with 2 long sleeved light sweaters. There were no shoes to be found, the same for the blouses.
I left, stopping on the way to the house for take out food.

After my early dinner, I proceeded to get myself ready for the evening. I intended on seeing the Las Vegas Strip, en femme. There are several CD friendly establishments here, but I had decided to visit them at a later date and just spend time
alone, no hurries or influence, just me.
I dressed casually, the new jeans fit perfect, the new hairpiece is wonderful and feels and looks natural. With this cut, the hair frames my face, and I have to occasionally flip the hair out of my eyes. I made a special effort to do my eyes right,
using my eyeliner and eyeshades, the look was very nice. Of course I did the facelift trick to raise my brows, which makes a big difference appearance wise.
Again my heart began to race as I gathered up my essentials...lipstick, compact powder, money, ID, all in a small handbag, i locked the house and drove away.
Within a few minutes, I was on the north end of Las Vegas Blvd. This was a holiday weekend, so tonight it was crowded. Perfect for dissapearing into the throngs of tourists. I drove towards the south end where the newer casinos are.
The casino self-parking is free, and there are many choices where to park. I chose the least busiest parking structure. I checked my make-up, hair and clothes. The weather was perfect, warm and breezy, no need for a jacket. My button up sweater,
jeans and one inch laced heels all fit together quite nicely.
There are cameras everywhere, and no way to avoid them, but I wasn't avoiding anything tonight. I took a deep breath, flipped my hair back and walked towards the exit to the street.

So here I am...Linsey is finally on the Vegas strip. I stood and took everything in, my senses were overwhelmed with the spectacle that Las Vegas is. People where everywhere, and I was one now one of them...just another person amongst thousands
of others. Which way should I go? It really didn't matter, I casually walked to the south, towards the Wynn, Palazo, MGM, Ballagio, Luxor, etc...
It is true about society, if you do not focus on everyone around you, they will not focus on you. Here it is too late to be concerned that they will notice that there is something different about you. I have every right to be here as much as they do.
Everything fell into place...my attitude, poise, appearance, feelings. People of all sorts walked with and past me, without so moch as a casual glance from anyone. Yes there were several men that gave me more than a passing glance. I even 'busted'
several as they focused on my body, particularly my 'upper tropics'. It was fun to look at them as they would look up from my chest and find that they were caught studying their particularly favorite object of a gals body. I smiled back at their
sheepish expression, no harm no foul, everything was alright. My confidence soared as I relaxed and walked. The Ballagio water show was about to start, I found a place along the rail, people also gathered on either side of me. Soon I was boxed in.
The show began with a bang of lights and fountains. Everyone gasped at the onslaught, myself included. An older couple had moved in next to me, the gentleman was almost leaning against me as the crowd grew. The rush of sensations was pleasant
as we continued to watch. I momentarily took note of my posture...lower back in, shoulders back, chest out, feet together, behind out, hands turned inwards. I observed how the other ladies stood, I counted myself as one of them.
By now the crowd too deep for me to leave, so I would have to wait for the show th end.
I was relieved when the show did end as I was wasn't much for water shows and I was weary of standing there completely surrounded. The crowd slowly dispersed in all directions and I was free to continue. I followed the crowd towards the bridges that cross over the main streets. (to be continued)

[shoegaze]

Like another poster, my first experience involved me driving around in my car and then chickening out and going back home.  My heart was racing the entire time and it felt like everyone within a miles radius was staring at me.

Not content to be controlled by fear, the next day I tried again, and actually made it to my destination: a thrift store.  I was extremely nervous at first but quickly realized that most people really weren't paying that much attention to me.  I recall when checking out (buying womens clothes of course) the cashier addressed me by a feminine pronoun, the first time I'd ever experienced that, it was exhilarating.

That was about a month and a half ago, in March.  Since then I have been going out 2-3 times per week at least and I am now comfortable in pretty much any setting.  Typically I go out shopping or running errands, or to places like the library, art gallery or museum.

I can pass pretty well appearance wise, but my voice is not passable which makes for some pretty interesting reactions from people I interact with.   

[Cindy]

Not to belabour the point. Most people don't care. It's a bigger thing for you than them. Once you get used to that just do it. There is a restaurant in a local hotel, 5 mins walk from my house. I go once a week, the staff have totally accepted me from go. I know I don't pass, especially my voice, but they are totally cool about it. Now a days, it's good evening Cindy. How are you, you're looking good, what would you like? Invariably one or two of the waitresses will drift past and have a chat. Since I'm alone at these times I think it is a female thing just to say hello to a female friend. And the conversations are female ones. I'm even getting to know their children's names and what they have been up to. What we did on the weekend all that sort of stuff. It's so pleasant.

But do be careful. There are predators. We need to take all the precautions.

Cindy

[Veronica Morph]

Wow Lindsey, your story is very exciting i could feel the esxperience in a way cause you detailed it well, i think that vegas is the best place in the us to go around and discovering things without getting bored and not being caught easily,

As you say people are on their own biz and most likely is very tolerant if some one discovers you are a TV, in anyway vegas is vegas.

I think one day i will do as you, and will try to do all sort of things in a very sexy outfit, i will also try to grab the atention i dont care, maybe i will be hired for zumanity hahahaha.

as cindy says very wisely, as long as you feel sure and confident and your mind is clear on what you want to accomplish, you will be able to repeat outings over and over and people wont take it wrong at seeing you if you get to look too obious,
for me i am doing outings everytime i can i it takes me time to prepare myself physicaly and mentally, i need to plan everydetail, i dont think that i can start to improvize and let things hapening down the road, as i dont have experience to deal with things and encounters and dont know how to react etc,
so it is step by step.

[Genevieve Swann]

I go anywhere I want enfemme within reason. I prefer company at times. Safety in numbers if you know what I mean. There are places and people I avoid because they may be hazardous to my well being.

[JulieC.]

I will never forget the first time even though it was more than 20 years ago.  I wasn't very accomplished at make up yet so I'm sure I did not look that good.  I was sooo nervous.  I wanted to go downtown to a gay friendly bar.  I thought that would be a safe place.  I was so worried I would get pull over by a cop or get in to an accident.  I was a wreck all the way.  I parked about a block away (that was as close as I could get).  Then I struggled walking over there in heels which turned out to be harder than I thought it would be.  I got all the way to the front door before I lost my nerve and went home.  I was so pissed at my self for chickening out.

It's gotten easier over the years to go out but I still find myself trying to avoid people.  I don't like to go into brightly lit places like grocery stores.  I know Cindy is right... most people don't notice and most that notice don't care.  It's all on me. 

I have always gone alone.  I should try and go with a friend.

[eshaver]

hey, so how many of you go out dressed as a female? do you go out alone, or with a friend. do you go to partys or to a dinner?
when was the first time you went out and were you alone, or do you went to a crossdresser party?

so how did it all started and who of you lives out of the closet and how does this looks like?

Hummmmmm, I started going out in public back in 1993. I would go to a Lesbian bar . I kwew I had to "Grow if I were to fully transition ". I simply watched what other real women wore , those that I found were sucessful in their professions and sometimes in the media . ellen

[Veronica Morph]

The post of JulieC, made me remeber some of my first outings, i never wrote the following one as i forgot completely,

I was all there fully dressed in my car parked next to a closed shopping center, it was around 8 pm, therefore no one was around , to the fron of me was the highway and the service lane was full of cars going back home from a long day of work, as usual....i was finishing my make up, i was getting it better and better, i put on my earrings and there i was exactly with the outfit is on my avatar the pink suit, i was wearing pointed pumps with a metallic heel, and i was feeling amazing, i took a drive over a bar that is open for all kind and on my opinion very friendly, the cashier lady is a tg and she was very glad to see me entering the venue, it was actually very early to arrive, there were maybe 5 souls already in there drinking a beer or something, i was really feeling very insecure, i took a sit next to the dancing area and i noticed that that night there it was gonna be a tv show, little by little the place started to be crowded, i was thinking on leaving as i was feeling many eyes over me, of course i was not really passing as a gg, but my outfit was giving a kinky feeling and many guys were around, and checking me out, many of them were giving me hints to come over and talk to me, i was feeling not like doing that maybe cause i am straight but i was not feeling threaten maybe only shy, i could explain easily after that i am not into guys when one of them will tell me his intention, and problem solved, but i never meant to be mean or unfriendly, the nerves just took me over and i took my purse and left, once at my car i was feeling i shouldn't leave i may better go back but there were already many people at the front door and everybody saw me leaving checking me out, i was feeling that if i go back i may get too many people trying to see my face as i already grabbed the attention for the night.

then i left for good, before going home i walk a park not very lonely but no one around me to see my face, i felt that that was outing has having no point at all.
For me now, going into the public and people looking at you is a thrill, i love the feeling of challenging beauty and people knowing i could fool them if i wanted, but i always do something in purpose to reconfirm to them im a guy in heels, and i dont want to fool you as a guy, just taking in easy!!!

[Rebecca.R]

Veronica, I think your pink outfit is gorgeous!!

[eshaver]

I got a breif moment to re- read a lot of what our friend Cindy said , great tips too ! I also spotted one of the Gals remarking as to driving about , same here , for me it was back in the early 1980's. The point I'm going to make today is , each time you go out , you actually can and will do better . Look, going from one gender to another isn't something you accomplish in  "Hollywood time ". Uh no offense to Hollywood , actually lived there one time myself . You get better by just working on a small step at a time . ellen

[Samantha Stone]

Last night I went out to a straight karaoke bar.  I have been going there weekly for several months and have become a regular that everyone remembers.  For some reason it has lost some of the appeal that I felt in the beginning.  I left early and wanted to expierence something different while dressed.  It was about 11pm and I ended up at Shari's restaurant for something to eat.  It wasn't that crowded and it was a major step for me to be out in public and not in a bar.  Someday I hope to get the courage to go out to the mall.

Samantha

[latingrl]

I guess I would consider my self lucky, I live about 25 miles east of Hollywood, we a lot of places to go out in the Hollywood area, shopping, restaurants, and the usual clubs. In the malls I might get a few stares but nothing bad has happened to me. I try to go out

[Genevieve Swann]

I go out but not often enough. "All dressed up and no where to go."   When going out I always use caution. Where I live can be dangerous at times. Always stay in public view and preferably with a friend.

[tekla]

Look, going from one gender to another isn't something you accomplish in  "Hollywood time "

True that, it's lots of little steps.  I started out pretty young, teenager, with driving around, then going out hiking at the Coast or in the redwoods.  Back then I was physically immature and it was the high mark of hippies in Sonoma county and the boy/girl thing was confusing everyone and I just took rank advantage of that.  (To tell the truth I've achieved most things in life by taking rank advantage.)  I didn't go to clubs or anything like that till after I was out of college.  But I did keep up the hikes.

[juanita s]

i have been out dressed 2 times, both times i went to a tri-ess meeting, but before the meeting started i went to a downtown mall in Salt Lake City.

[LaPapito]

  I know this thread tends to be more on the "female" side, but you know me...I just have to add me-little-ol-2-cents...

I have been dressing in male-form every since I can remember...part of my military life, made the transition to wear male clothing, that much easier...
and when I go out-and-about...I am in full gear from, boxers-to-packing, to slacks-to-shoes...the "whole" nine-yards...even at home...it is the same....

I pretty much don't care what the hells people think...if I am not thinking about what they are doing, and whom they are doing IT with, then why the hells should they be all up in my business...plain and simple!

I am not afraid to go out in "full" form, and for those individuals whom I am surrounded by, I have no problem in explaining, why I am not a Lesbian, even though I date women...so for me, comprehension is very important, but not required, because I know who I am, and I have accepted me a very long time ago!

If I can accept you, then honestly, you should be able to accept me...notice, I said should...you don't have to be accepted, but you should be accepted...   

[Cindy]

I think that FtM pass far more easily in public than MtF. Without being in any way offensive 'female bodied people' can wear anything they want and society accepts it. Sort of like when 'male' business suits were fashionable for women, no one batted an eye. But a 'male bodied  looking person' wearing a 'female' business suit would be commented upon.

It seems very unfair.

Cindy