Doubts about my future.

[Holly31]

Hello all. I am in the process of transition from male to female it's been a little over a year on doctor prescribed meds. I currently still live as a male but am finding it harder and harder each day. The issue I am having is will transition make me happy? I have wanted to be a girl since  early childhood and made the decision at 25 to start. Now married with no children to a GG I am doubting my future. I want to be a girl so bad but am scared that when it is all said and done I will not be happy.

[Siren]

In my experience transition doesn't make you happy, it just takes away the Gender Dysphoria.
I no longer have GD but I'd say I was less happy than I was before I transitioned.

[Ann Onymous]

These are significant issues that are best discussed with your therapist.  The reality is that some people find that as the HRT progresses and a move towards the RLT takes place that perhaps transition is not what will address the internal issues.  This is not to say that some measure of trepidation is unusual...some people stop at the edge of the abyss while  others have no problems taking the next step, accepting whatever may come next.  Others can take the next step over the edge of teh abyss only after working through things with whoever their provider may be.

[Nero]

Hi Holly,
Like Siren said, I don't really think it's a question of happiness, but of real living. A lot of cis men and women aren't particularly happy; just free from an incongruous body.

[BunnyBee]

This is how I see it.  If you don't have anything constantly bringing you down, happiness is something you choose to be when you wake up in the morning and throughout the day.  Transition can diminish and make manageable one of the biggest burdens a human being can be encumbered with.  This can, for a lot of people, make happiness an available option for the first time in their lives.  After transition, I finally learned what sustained happiness actually feels like. 🙂

[sweetie87]

This is how I see it.  If you don't have anything constantly bringing you down, happiness is something you choose to be when you wake up in the morning and throughout the day.  Transition can diminish and make manageable one of the biggest burdens a human being can be encumbered with.  This can, for a lot of people, make happiness an available option for the first time in their lives.  After transition, I finally learned what sustained happiness actually feels like.

This. Totally agree.

@Holly31. reviewing your posts it seems you're already on HRT. What is the reason you're not living fulltime?

[Holly31]

These answers are wonderful. Well here it is in a nutshell. I have a wonderful life I love my wife and things have been great, it's just the whole loose everything thing. She will not stay with me if I transition full time but I am miserable as a man. Oh and to answer the last question why am I still living as a man.... Hell I don't know.. I am terrified! For me to go fulltime it would take a new job, new living area in another city or state and loosing my best friend my wife.