why do men stare?

[Fate]

misunderstood expressions or just paranoid?

on a good day walking into the (womens) washroom without anyone raising a eyebrow, maybe on a bad day 1 or 2 look, but not that much longer that looking at anyone eles. no one to date has complained or said "the other washroom is that way".

But why is it that men stare for long? Are they better at knowing your trans? Or do they just stare? Am talking about much more men stareing with that disapproval expression. The reaction seems to be better overall with women who walk past but some do it too, or is it that their so good at reading it they dismiss you right away?

Perhaps getting paranoid lately since I threw out the last set of boy's clothes, just that feeling pressured simply doing daily life things

[~RoadToTrista~]

Well, my dad is apparently able to read a tgirl on the spot by looking at her shoulders. He did so when I showed him that Thailand's Got Talent video, lolz..... Or maybe he was just expecting it for some reason.

I wouldn't worry too much about it, maybe you're just paranoid

[Catherine]

You're female and go into mens toilets and you wonder why men stare......

[Tyler]

You're female and go into mens toilets and you wonder why men stare......

I agree, the poor boys! Of course they are starin, some hot chick came into the bathroom where they are exposed!

[V M]

Yes, if you look female the males will stare at you with dismay and/or laugh when you enter...

"Their Domain"

Some will direct you to the "ladies Room"

But the clincher for me is when I was washing my hands and a young man ran out and loudly announced that a woman was in the "Boy's Room"

Guess who had to step out of the men's room to see a full on group of Cub and Boy Scouts waiting to use the potty 

[wannalivethetruth]

I agree.lolll..who wouldnt stare??? if u went into a mens bathroom as a woman..doh. Haaha..now ask urself that question..if a man walked into the girls bathroom...would u stare at him? Of course!

[JessicaR]

  They're staring because they're trying to figure you out.

  Here's my theory: Gender recognition is something that happens almost instantly but is also incredibly complex. Whenever we see another human, the first thing we recognize, even though we're not conscious of it, is their gender. Because you're gender variant, the gender identification process slows down for others. It's not their fault... it's a thought process loop. They see you in the mens' room so they immediately identify you as male but then the identification process kicks in.. their brain sees female attributes in the mens' room... so there's a pause. That's why they stare. It's like a mental short-circuit.

Your post makes me think of my experiences in the mens' room at work during early transition. I started to get stares like you mentioned. I remember the last time I used the mens' room.... a guy walked in, looked at me and walked, crotch first, into a sink.  I went straight to HR and said, "I think it's time for me to start using  the ladies' room."

  My advice to you would be to start trying out the ladies room....  If you act like you're supposed to be there, few will give you a second look.

[Fate]

bad english sorry
was trying to say i pass better while in the women's washroom without anyone complaining
but after going outside into any street people start judgeing, mostly men

it could be they are taking longer to work it out with no ill intentions, but why do men stare longer than anyone other women has on average?

[Janet_Girl]

If we are beginning transition and are not quite full time, people will pick up on those subtle changes.  And then they begin to second guess them selves that they maybe in the wrong place themselves.

Out in the world, I think it is because they are attracted.  And if they realize or read you, they wonder about themselves yet again.

[Gabby]

  They're staring because they're trying to figure you out.

  Here's my theory: Gender recognition is something that happens almost instantly but is also incredibly complex. Whenever we see another human, the first thing we recognize, even though we're not conscious of it, is their gender.

I think Gender recognition is something we develop and practice, it's an inherent ability which has been emphasised within certain cultures, we develop that ability to recognise the gender of others just as we develop our own gender identity.

I can envision a society of androgynous humans where gender plays a far less of a role, but it will still be there.  haha me right now at the start of transition would fit right in.

[Cindy]

I may be wrong, but is your post about why men look at woman and not at men? Men are reported to be very visual sexually  people and like to look at female (or male if the are Gay) bodies.  Women on the other hand are less visual but more personality and tactile driven. That's why your boy friend goes crazy when you wear some sexy gear and you really don't know why,  but you can direct his lust to interesting places.
 

Cindy

[Rock_chick]

Men stare at women because that's what men do...they stare even more if your pretty.

[JenJen2011]

You may just be paranoid. Just because a man stares doesn't mean they can tell your trans.
At the beginning of my transition, of course everyone could tell because I was just starting out.
So that stuck with me for a long time even after going full-time.
One day, I was out and about minding mine when a group of guys were pointing and smiling, a few, laughing.
I immediately thought they were making fun of me. I got the courage and went up to them and asked,
"what is so funny?" and they started giving me compliments and flirting with me.
Then I felt stupid and was embarrassed and started blushing, lol.
So, maybe guys stare at you because you're a hot bombshell. 
And women, well, why would they stare at another woman?

[-CRaSH-]

Because a woman walked into the males bathroom.

Seriously what would you girls do if I walked into the women's bathroom while you were in it?

[AmySmiles]

I dont think it means they disapprove just because they arent smiling when looking. Some look with intensity or a blank look which can be very unnerving.

I got one of these in a tea house yesterday, a very intense stare at me (while he was sitting with his girlfriend).  I was freaking out for a second because I thought I'd been read, but he probably just thought I was hot.  I'm glad my friend was there to help take some of the edge off.

[Melody Maia]

I got one of these in a tea house yesterday, a very intense stare at me (while he was sitting with his girlfriend).  I was freaking out for a second because I thought I'd been read, but he probably just thought I was hot.  I'm glad my friend was there to help take some of the edge off.

Amy, I KNOW he thought you were hot.   

[kate durcal]

Years ago when I was under the influence of testosterone, I stared a women out of plain lust and desire, sometime it will be out admiration for their beauty and sweetens, yet some other time it will be out plain contempt for their beachness, and sometimes because they were poorly or funnily dress.

Now I get stared for the same reasons, and on occasion because the poor souls cannot tell whether i am a female r male. In the last case  I usually say "Hi" and smile, and they usually say "Hi" back and smile or back off with a "wildbeast" expression their face LOL

I take no offense to any type of stare, but I am extremely aware of my environmental surroundings.

Kate

[Adrienne May]

Dear Newbie, The trouble is you are a newbie and are terribly self conscious. Men always stare and judge women in a way that women do not do. Even the most unattractive male will say a woman is a fox or a dog and they always consider themselves fit though they may be the pits. It will get easier, as you become more adept at making the best of yourself and become more self assured. At the moment you are waiting for discovery and fearing it. Be confident. Stand tall, shoulders back, chin up. Be proud and ignore people's looks.

[kate durcal]

Well said Adrienne May! It also helps to assume that most stares are plain admiration

Kate

[Caith]

Might I suggest another explanation?  Men stare because they don't have the finely-honed social skills of a woman.  Women don't stare, but they definitely observe other women, take mental notes, and think about it.