pegged as the correct/incorrect gender at an awkward time

[Nygeel]

Today was an odd day. I went shopping for clothes with my mom and wanted to try on a few things. My parents don't bring up my trans stuff and I don't bring it up to them, either. It works out a bit better for everybody this way. When I went to the fitting rooms (with my mother waiting to get a number to try stuff on) the employee pointed towards the men's fitting room. It was only the 2nd time I've been read as male since starting T and I was hesitant to actually use the men's fitting room (especially with my parent there). It was an odd situation to be read correctly and caused me to smile.

So, have there been situations where you were read as the correct/incorrect gender in a situation that was awkward or uncomfortable?

[RabbitsOfTheWorldUnite]

A memorable moment several years ago was when I was out having dinner with my parents and the waitress referred to me as Miss throughout the evening. I wasn't even trying to pass! I'd say at that stage in my life I was completely andro.

[Serra]

I transitioned in-place at a retail store, and we have many repeat customers.  Some don't recognize me (they asked if I was new) some haven't made any comments and refer to me as miss, and the rare couple still call me sir (even with boobs and a nametag with my new name).  Had one of the latter around a customer who had never been in the store before.  When he called me sir, the new customer gave him a strange look, and when he was out of ear shot, asked "Can he see okay?"
When I went the doctor to look at my imbedded piercing, my previous PCP (who I hadn't seen in a few years) wasn't available so I saw someone new.  The checkin lady showed me a sheet with all my personal info on it and had me confirm it was all correct.  I changed my address and handed it back.  She looked over her glasses at me and said "...are you sure that's all?"  After I got called to go in, the nurse gave a double take and asked my birthday and full name four separate times.

[Just Shelly]

Awkward times, YES thats the story of my life lately.

Yes its nice being gendered correctly, but not when I'm not out and currently presenting male. Most times I just go with it, other times I have to let gender be known so ohhh gets weird.

1. Emergency room with son,check in nurse, "your his Father"?, Yes. "His Father"? Yes!

2. Hardware store thinking they view me as male, until clerk asks "Ms. do you need some help finding something"

3. Went to wedding reception kind of a redneck one at that. Presenting 1000% male UGH first 5 minutes there, waiting at bar man says boy your the most patient lady I ever seen. 

4. Many times shopping with my children, gets pretty awkward especially when they shout out DAD! in a store 1 minute after being gendered female! 

The story of my life at this stage.

Does feel really good though

Shelly

[juliekins]

Awkward times, YES thats the story of my life lately.

Yes its nice being gendered correctly, but not when I'm not out and currently presenting male. Most times I just go with it, other times I have to let gender be known so ohhh gets weird.

1. Emergency room with son,check in nurse, "your his Father"?, Yes. "His Father"? Yes!

2. Hardware store thinking they view me as male, until clerk asks "Ms. do you need some help finding something"

3. Went to wedding reception kind of a redneck one at that. Presenting 1000% male UGH first 5 minutes there, waiting at bar man says boy your the most patient lady I ever seen. 

4. Many times shopping with my children, gets pretty awkward especially when they shout out DAD! in a store 1 minute after being gendered female! 

The story of my life at this stage.

Does feel really good though

Shelly

Shelly, I don't even know how you could try and pass as male! I'm assuming that you're rapidly approaching full time?

During my transition, my partner Julie Marie, used to tell me that " the only person who didn't know that I was not a full time lady was me". That might also apply to you?

[Dana Lane]

Was waiting on the elevator at work. Woman (with a child in a stroller) asks where such and such was. I told her (voice is not feminine). Her little boy, must be around 2 years old, speaks out loudly saying "Are you a boy or a girl"? There are other people standing there and I feel so uncomfortable! I tried to ignore him but then he said, with a much louder voice, "Are you a boy or a girl"...ugh...pondering about the possibility of making my teeth flip around backwards so I could chew my brains out of my skull. I look at him and smile. Then, almost yelling at the top of his lungs..."ARE YOU A BOY OR A GIRL!!!!"? I said "I am a girl"...he was satisfied and paid me no more attention. I was petrified during that time but in the end, his innocence was so adorable.

[Northern Jane]

The only time I screwed up big time was when I left  the country for SRS in 1974. All my paperwork was male but I didn't look very 'male' even in a baggy shirt and blue jeans.

After surgery, I was SO relieved it was all over that I gave the last of my andro clothes to my nurse's boyfriend. I was just SO happy I wasn't thinking ahead.

I was flirting with a young business man on the long trip back and it wasn't until we were walking toward Customs & Immigration  at the airport that I realized I did NOT look like my ID and if I produced male ID it was going to cause quite a commotion. I clung to the arm of the young man I had been flirting with, the Customs officer assumed we were a couple, and I passed through with no problem ..... and a WHOLE LOT OF RELIEF!

I could not imagine, in 1974, trying to explain it all to airport security! LOL!

[rieko]

Several years ago, before I started transitioning, some friends and I went bowling in costume on Halloween. I, naturally, made a 'costume' of one of my girlfriend-at-the-time's outfits (We were the same size. Was that a coincidence or was I subconsciously dating her for the convenient supply of clothes?) and a wig. When we were leaving the bowling alley, the guy at the counter admitted with a shocked look that he thought I was a girl until I was close enough for him to see my beard shadow. It made me happy, especially because I was kinda trying not to pass, to avoid anyone suspecting the motivation behind my costume choice.

[insideontheoutside]

I stopped at a freeway rest stop not too long ago and I just had a bad feeling about using the mens restroom there. It seemed really busy and I just didn't want to deal with it so I walked around it to the other side where the women's was and ducked in. I had sunglasses on and naturally there was a line in there. This old woman looked at me in the mirror reflection and then turned around and looked and said, "You're in the wrong line hun". So I was kinda like, "er, oh, sorry." So I basically just went out around the back again and waited awhile, then went back in and luckily no one was in line!

[VeronikaFTH]

Awkward times, YES thats the story of my life lately.

Yes its nice being gendered correctly, but not when I'm not out and currently presenting male. Most times I just go with it, other times I have to let gender be known so ohhh gets weird.

1. Emergency room with son,check in nurse, "your his Father"?, Yes. "His Father"? Yes!

2. Hardware store thinking they view me as male, until clerk asks "Ms. do you need some help finding something"

3. Went to wedding reception kind of a redneck one at that. Presenting 1000% male UGH first 5 minutes there, waiting at bar man says boy your the most patient lady I ever seen. 

4. Many times shopping with my children, gets pretty awkward especially when they shout out DAD! in a store 1 minute after being gendered female! 

The story of my life at this stage.

Does feel really good though

Shelly

Hah.. this is funny.. I have a ten year old daughter who has shouted out "Dad" imediately after I was gendered female... a bit awkward though it is kind of funny to see people's reactions.

She has begun calling me "mom" though even at home, so that doesn't happen much anymore.

I think it's interesting when you think you're being gendered male only to find out that's not the case. I was totally not dressed female once, straight out of work, and wound up stopping by the pet store to pick up some food for my Chihuahua. I must have talked to the guy behind the counter for five or ten minutes chatting about whatever, then when I left he said "Have a good night, Miss"... I was floored. Lol...

[Britney♥Bieber]

Last night my family went out to dinner, and my parents are pretty much anti transition. "If you really want this you can wait a few years" "You're being impulsive" etc, but the waitress looked at me and said "and for you ma'am?" I nearly died. xD

[VeronikaFTH]

Last night my family went out to dinner, and my parents are pretty much anti transition. "If you really want this you can wait a few years" "You're being impulsive" etc, but the waitress looked at me and said "and for you ma'am?" I nearly died. xD

Gah I hate when people tell me that. "You should wait a few years" or something similar. Yeah, well I've been waiting all my life, and I almost wound up dead. People just don't understand what it's like to be us and never will. I think it's great Britney that you are doing it now. I only wish I'd started when I was your age.

By the way you look adorable in your new avatar 

[Ryno]

hahahaha at my old work as a grocery store cashier i was read as male by most of my customers. but my manager and coworkers still called me "she" even though they knew to call me "ryan". So one day I was working customer service and had to call my manager to help with a complication, I can't remember what it was but it wasn't an everyday mix up, and involved some math and heaving a heavy bag around. The lady said to my manager who was standing next to me something along the lines of "He's a good cashier, isn't he?" and my manager looks at her, puzzled for a second, and says, "Yep, she's a good little worker."

I just stared between the two with a look not too far off from :| and when the situation was over and I was alone I just started laughing... the customer was so confused.

[Ryno]

Hah.. this is funny.. I have a ten year old daughter who has shouted out "Dad" imediately after I was gendered female... a bit awkward though it is kind of funny to see people's reactions.

She has begun calling me "mom" though even at home, so that doesn't happen much anymore.

I think it's interesting when you think you're being gendered male only to find out that's not the case. I was totally not dressed female once, straight out of work, and wound up stopping by the pet store to pick up some food for my Chihuahua. I must have talked to the guy behind the counter for five or ten minutes chatting about whatever, then when I left he said "Have a good night, Miss"... I was floored. Lol...

Sorry for double posting, but it's stories like these two that make me smile

[Britney♥Bieber]

Gah I hate when people tell me that. "You should wait a few years" or something similar. Yeah, well I've been waiting all my life, and I almost wound up dead. People just don't understand what it's like to be us and never will. I think it's great Britney that you are doing it now. I only wish I'd started when I was your age.

By the way you look adorable in your new avatar 

Honestly I don't think waiting would do anything but cause me to become more depressed and suicidal. I'm at a place where I see a great future that motivates me. But being a "man" would kill me.

[Keroppi]

Although I'm not technically out to my parents, I dress in female clothing except skirt/dress, handbag and basic makeup even when round them. A few months back I was working at their restaurant which is in a small section to a pub which is run by the landlord's partner. A couple of guys from a few feet away with the bar top between us trying to get my attention shouted "Excuse me.... erm... love?" When I approached, he was like "I'm sorry, I can't tell if you're a boy or a girl." I just shrugged. At soon as I turned around and walked away, he turned to the landlord's partner and asked "* I can't tell if that one's a boy or a girl." She replied "Supposed to be a boy." Oops

[Kaisa]

I'm so happy that in finnish the words for he and she are the same (hän). It will problably save me a lot of problems, especialy if I'm somewhere with my friends who have some dificulties rebembering about my situation.

[Ryno]

I'm so happy that in finnish the words for he and she are the same (hän). It will problably save me a lot of problems, especialy if I'm somewhere with my friends who have some dificulties rebembering about my situation.

D: lucky. If only all languages could have evolved that way

[jxpx]

Once, I used the women's restroom at a store I was in when I was only a month or two on T and didn't feel comfortable using the men's yet.  At this point, I usually tried to just avoid public restrooms altogether, but sometimes these things happen, so I tried to hurry in and out as fast as possible.  The bathroom was empty when I went in and empty when I came out of the stall, so I was relieved.  I washed my hands and then pulled open the door to go out as a woman was pushing the door to come in.  The second she saw me, this look of complete panic came over her and she started stumbling over her words and said something about being in the wrong bathroom.  I just stayed quiet and quickly walked out. 

There was also the time I was with my girlfriend's mom (who doesn't know I'm trans) and we were referred to as "ladies" by a store employee.  Her mom quickly corrected the guy, but yeah...that was bad.

[Brent123]

Oh my god yes. I went to a basketball game with my dad and this guy comes up and says, "I see you're raising a nice son here." I basically had a heart attack. Then, we went to this bar and the bartender said "Oh he's not old enough to drink" to which my dad said "She's not going to have any alcohol." I felt really embarrassed. But its good to know I pass I guess.