My f'ing sister

[Sly]

Most of my family accepts me being trans, except for my older sister.  I came out to my family last October or so, and Thanksgiving was the first time I got to actually see them all in person.  My sister barely spoke to me while I was there, called me by my old name and refused to hug me goodbye.  I know that she's complained to my Dad about this, saying that she "doesn't approve."  Her exact words.  As if I need her permission or something.  Despite this, I tried to reach out to her.  I friended her on Facebook and bought her a Christmas present.  She never thanked me for it and hasn't spoken to me at all in months, until the other day...
Basically, I'm in a sociology of gender class in college.  My teacher was talking about cosmetics the other day, and how they exist to oppress and objectify women.  I can see where she's coming from, kind of, but I don't really agree.  So I made a sarcastic post on Facebook about it ("So today I learned that makeup is OPPRESSIVE and if you think you like it you are BRAINWASHED BY THE PATRIARCHY").  My sister is... well, dense.  And couldn't tell I was being sarcastic.  So she sent me a really angry text saying that she likes these things, just because I 'think I'm not a girl' doesn't mean femininity is oppressive, and if I keep OFFENDING HER OMGGG she's going to delete me from her friends list.  I told her it was just sarcasm, and asked if she liked the gift I got her.  It took her a couple hours to respond and all she said was 'it's cute.'
Now maybe that sounds minor and I'm being petty about this.  But what pisses me off is that I've tried to reach out to her and be nice, despite the way she's treated me.  And she doesn't even care.  It's obvious that she was just waiting for me to say something that she thought she could turn into a fight.  Come on sis, you are 24, not 10.

[N.Chaos]

I don't think you're overreacting, I think your sister is though. That's incredibly immature.

[Heath]

At least your sister talks to you. =/  Not that it's a huge loss that mine doesn't, but she and her family pretty much don't acknowledge my existence.  Then again she married an abusive husband and they're all conservative Christian Tea Partiers. @_@

I can relate though, totally.  The way I see it is if she decides not to speak with you anymore then it's clearly her loss.  Damned unfortunate yes, but still it's not your problem.  You've been doing what you can to help educate her and you've been waiting for acceptance.  Ball's in her court now.

[nickikim]

I have an older brother who treated me like crap for thirty years, finally enough was enough, i gave up ,his kids still see me from time to time, but i just won t be bothered to even think about him again. But we never were a warm cuddley family anywa.y.And not bailing him out anymore gives me extra money to buy OPPRESSION from the man.

[~RoadToTrista~]

Ugh, try understanding what she's going through. Of course she cares, she's upset, she's lost her sister. You can't expect everyone in your family to take it lightly, she grew up with you. I assume that she also isn't very experienced with transsexuals. I know I wouldn't take it lightly either.

[Sly]

We were never close to begin with so she's hardly losing anything.  And it would be easier to understand what she's going through if she would actually talk to me about her feelings.  I've offered to talk to her, told her I'm willing to answer any questions, and she hasn't taken me up on it.  This little outburst just proves that she only wants to cause trouble and then act like it's my fault.

[Alex37]

It's her loss, and it's her fault if she chooses not to talk to you.  You've done everything you can it seems, and it sucks that she's not responding well.  Hopefully with time she'll come around.

Then again she married an abusive husband and they're all conservative Christian Tea Partiers. @_@

same here- sorry dude.  the upside to your sister not talking to you is that there's no chance you'll have to help your sisters (possible) kids color this in:  http://www.coloringbook.com/teapartycoloringbook.aspx
fun times 

[Sly]

So yeah, old topic, but a little update on the state of things:

My sister and I got in a fight recently.  She didn't like me asking to talk to her and try to reach some kind of understanding, I guess.  I called her intolerant, which she says she's not, but then she went on to say that I "choose to live an alternative life style."  Long story short, we're not speaking any more.  And nothing of value was lost.

[Alex37]

I'm sorry man. 

People do change sometimes, so hopefully she will.  It's her loss though, and she i doubt she really feels good about it deep down.  i noticed that with my fundamentalist christian tea party sister.  she won't talk to my gay cousin anymore, and she goes on and on about why she's right in doing that so much that it seems like she's trying to convince herself more than anyone.  so, i have hope that she'll some day come to a place where she stops trying to convince herself to live by other people's rules.  maybe the same will happen with your sister. 

it does really suck though.  i know family is important. 

[spacial]

Now maybe that sounds minor and I'm being petty about this.

No, no. You're not being petty at all. You're the mature one, attempting to give this incredably spoilt and increasingly pathetic child, plenty of time to grow up and accept that they don't run the world.

As someone who also walked away from my own family, I really do understand. You don't apologise for being you. But you've been enormously patient here. A lot more than I was ever prepared to be.