How to pick a therapist? Draw names out of a hat?

[Cen]

I'm going to be seeing a therapist to help me sort out my GID.  I'm not seeking to transition or begin HRT at this time, and I'm not really sure what to expect out of them.

I've thought about some of the online therapists I've read about here because it might feel more comfortable to me, but that route seems a bit sketchy.  On the other hand, I'm not sure I'm ready to deal with this face to face with a stranger.  I've gone over a list of local therapists with relevant experience and the idea of sitting down with one of them is ...well, to say it makes me uncomfortable is an understatement.

[JohnAlex]

I am about to make an appointment with a therapist. and I as well already feel worried about how uncomfortable I will feel trying to talk about this.  the only thing I can hope is that a therapist understands that sometimes it's hard for us to talk about it, and perhaps he/she will know how to help slowly begin to become comfortable talking about it.  at least, that's what I would hope.
I am willing to try to become comfortable talking about it.  I wish I already was comfortable.  so if I'm willing and my therapist will help, I think it might turn out alright.

[Randy]

When I first started transitioning, the knowledge that I would have to see a therapist scared the living crap out of me    . But I promise it gets easier with time. As for online therapy - I know what you mean, most do seem sketchy... I've pasted my therapist's info at the bottom (if you've looked around this section of the forum you've probably seen it before, lol). I, along with most of the local trans community round these parts got our letters from him, as well as therapy for other issues. He's started offering online therapy through skype, though that would still be face to face so I don't know if that would be easier for you or not. He is very involved in the trans community here and a great therapist besides:


Dr. David Baker-Hargrove
Phone: 407-963-5664
Email: bhspyconsult@hotmail.com
Website: www.drdavidbakerhargrove.com

[Cen]

I went ahead and sent them an e-mail to see if I can set up an appointment.  If I don't like it I can always try something else.  I doubt I'd go through Skype initially, but that could be useful if I ever want something more face to face without seeing someone new.  Thanks.

[Robert Scott]

I found my therapist by getting a recommendation from my son's therapist.  I have never been to counseling and was scared to death of it.  Now, that I have seen her for a couple months I am completely comfortable talking with her and going to appointments.   She has an ftm brother so she has been through the family stuff.  She asks me questions that helped me see that I am truly trans.  I had lots of doubts and questioned myself all the time.  I didn't know if I even wanted hrt.  Now, I am confident with moving forward.  I personally was annoyed with the idea of having to see a counselor ... but now I am glad I went.... I am far more confident and comfortable with my decision.

[Cen]

I'm glad it's working out for you.  I guess I might be in a similar position that you were.  I don't think I'm particularly severe compared to a lot of people, but it only seems to get worse as more time passes.  Transitioning isn't something I feel desperate enough to try, but I've been really upset on a regular basis lately.  When I want to cry I just start yelling instead, and it has been putting a strain on my relationship and life in general.

[Janet_Girl]

I used a hat pin and the phone book.

Just kidding.  Actually my therapist was listed in the phone book as a gender therapist.  He also is one of the leading gender identity therapist in Oregon.

[Cen]

Who did/do you see?  I live in Portland.  I was looking over some of the therapists at http://www.sarabecker.com/t/therapists_in_the_portland_metro.htm initially.

For now, I set up an appointment next week.

[Cen]

Well, after doing an online appointment I decided face to face would be better and more affordable.  My first appointment in person was today, and it went fairly well.  I was surprised at how easy it was to talk to her given how tense and anxious I was feeling at the time.  My neck wouldn't loosen up and it was all I could do to keep from shaking in my seat at first.  It was also easier to discuss how I really feel compared to when I've spoken to my girlfriend.  When I take worrying about my relationship out of the picture what I need to do is clear as day to me.  All in all, I think it was a good move towards feeling more comfortable with fully transitioning.  I should be able to start up HRT in a few months without any issues.

[RhinoP]

Dr. David Barker's blog is truly stunning and I think his first article is extremely descriptive to the modern world vs. pre-1998. He couldn't be more right, and he's a therapist who became quickly more educated about the modern world through the internet and forums moreso than any college course in 1987 taught him. The schoolbooks didn't teach these things back then, and even taught against them (I know, I've read the books and have studied with the students.) He seems to be a therapist for the times and he seems to have an extraordinary view of the world as it operates now!

Plus he's gay!

I'm giving him a call, straightaway!

[Cen]

Yeah, my initial appointment was with him.  He seemed pretty cool, but I couldn't afford enough time with him to be worth it.

I'm just glad I'm able to see someone now on a semi-regular basis.  It feels like I am finally moving forward.

[purplevelvet]

Anyone know a decent therapist in the lower Hudson Valley (NY)? I only seem to find some upstate or in NYC. It really does feel like picking names from a hat and I feel rather scared to do that. Thanks Oh and btw, Hi..my first post.
Alison

[Francis Ann Burgett]

Kori, there a lot of therapist that just take your money, i. e. talk visit, come back, etc....

If you need one to talk with that's ok. If you need one for a letter for HRT ask them poing blank if they are going to give you a letter, if they hesitate move on to the next one.

Good luck.