You have a pretty good handle on it, imo, and actually, the question is "Who am I".
There is a blurring point between nonbinary trans and binary trans that becomes kind of a place where the question also becomes, does it matter.
It used to matter when the gatekeepers required full life etc to get necessary surguries and they still do that, force the conformance to binary transition for nonbinary identities that require surgery to be mentally healthy. That fear root is one of the biggest problems we have, it enforces a binary approach to being trans.
But the bottom line, is what makes you happy. There is no reason to conform to stereotypes, I have clear polished nails by the way, and can't stand it when they aren't. My typical presentation is more androgyne than anything else.
I really like living like that. It feels so natural.
And that's really the thing, what feels natural, what feels pushed. If its pushed why do it? Its not coming from your core if its pushed, its not coming from truth. If your goal is to come from truth, then it starts with feeling what is hollow and what is full.
And from there you can do anything you want, you get the mirror to look back at you feeling good about what you see, and take it from there, monitoring dysphoria.
I consider myself kind of mtf trans, but in actuality its more mta. The difference is I take full transition hormones.
A full transition does not make you any less nonbinary than a partial transition or no hormone transition does. Transition is just modifying your body to represent who you are, more than represent, be.
Its to get your sex, sexuality, and gender lined up with you.
Then we line that up socially, and that's where it can get tough, especially nonbinary. But when I look at myself, there isn't too much different from me being like a lesbian woman out there in the world, there is a similarity that runs fairly deep. I am bisexual by the way, I just don't act on the side that is attracted to men. Unfortunately my body is wired that way, its a hard sacrifice I make because I love my cisgender straight wife. She accepts me as an androgyne and not as mtf ts. I am cool with that.
Like I said, you cannot see the difference visually between me and a ts woman. At least not early in the morning or late at night. She sees the nonbinary spirit in me, and that's the core of this whole conversation, for me.
Do anything, be anything, but the question is usually not what am I, which can limit you, but who am I, which can free you and take you straight to your living, loving, truth.
