The Official "You Look....Alright" Thread

[insideontheoutside]

So after about three years of oscillating between masculine and feminine expression/identity and everything in between, I've finally (with the help of my awesome friends from my college's LGBTUnion) realized I have a genderqueer identity and have for the present settled on an androgynous male expression. Really the "aha" moment for the latter came when I watched the first season of the L Word with Shane. A kind of long-haired butch expression really suits what I want to present as.

It's a very alright look. Actually, your hair is kinda perfect.

[suzifrommd]

It felt really, really good to see this.

It's probably not any more accurate than your average Cosmo quiz, but still, there's some validation from the results. I really did expect it to say something like "you're just a guy. Get over it". I'm still dealing with some it's-all-in-your-head self-talk, so it was nice to hear someone, even a dubious online quiz, agree with me.

[BlueSloth]

That score looks alright

I don't like the COGIATI test because it makes too many unstated assumptions about who's taking it (although if you fit those assumptions, great).  I like the S.A.G.E. test better.  But they both got me right.

The simple, silly gender tests tend to say I'm male or female, pretty much randomly  LOL

[suzifrommd]

I don't like the COGIATI test because it makes too many unstated assumptions about who's taking it (although if you fit those assumptions, great).  I like the S.A.G.E. test better.  But they both got me right.

Hadn't heard of the S.A.G.E. before. I tried it this morning and it pasted me as an androgyne at dead center. That sounds a little skewed - despite everything I think I'm still probably more man than woman, but it was good to get just one more validation that this whole thing isn't all in my head.

[barbie]

Hi, I put my photo here, because I look andro now. I try something new, what do you think? I'm, now about 1 week off HRT so I have some unvanted face changes. 

Hi, Medusa,

You look fine. I think your eyes are especially attractive, and you may accentuate them by some makeup. I was denied HRT as I am married.

Barbie~~

[barbie]

I am tired from drinking alcohol beverages every night, but I should look all right.
While strolling in the street near the hotel last Saturday:



And at night again drinking...



Barbie~~

[Eva Marie]

[suzifrommd]

GIR-IRL!! You go!

[Jamiep]

riven1

Where have you been hiding?! Curves, pretty face, like the hair.

Jamie

[Eva Marie]

agfrommd - thanks

Jamiep - i'm bigender so i'm only in "girl mode" occasionally. Thats "Eva", who has been quite shy about public appearances. Eva did make her first foray out into the world recently and had a blast; she's gaining confidence - thanks for the kind words!

[Jamiep]

riven1

Hello "Eva." I have never forgotten my first time out in public, it was Great! That first time is a confidence builder, that makes you realize you belong out in the world. Congratulations. Now you can fly. Freedom for Eva.
Enjoy
Jamie

[Carbon]

That score looks alright

I don't like the COGIATI test because it makes too many unstated assumptions about who's taking it (although if you fit those assumptions, great).  I like the S.A.G.E. test better.  But they both got me right.

The simple, silly gender tests tend to say I'm male or female, pretty much randomly  LOL

I think the COGIATI test could be really harmful if the wrong person ran into it. It could really scare someone or destroy their confidence if they got the wrong result. I think we look for these kinds of tests because we're afraid to take responsibility for our decisions, although a lot of the time we're more afraid of other people punishing or judging us than we are of just living with those decisions.

One thing I know is that being autistic made my score much more male than it would otherwise be, although when I took again for the first time in about a year I scored "probable transsexual" instead of "androgyne." That reflects how I'm feeling now, I guess. But both times my scores would be way, way higher if I could remember people's names (memory problems), could recognize people's faces easily (prosopagnosia), could easily read people's feelings, etc... basically super autism=male bias. But then I guess that's why so many autistic women never get diagnosed.

(Oh and I think math is "fun and useful" which turned out to be the malest possible choice. I'm not some kind of math genius, but yes it's fun like a puzzle and yes math is useful for a lot of things. I mean is anyone seriously going to argue that math is useless?)

The autism label makes it very easy for me to describe why this test doesn't fit me very well. Other people may not have a neat label like that, but it could fit them just as badly.

[suzifrommd]

I think the COGIATI test could be really harmful if the wrong person ran into it. It could really scare someone or destroy their confidence if they got the wrong result. I think we look for these kinds of tests because we're afraid to take responsibility for our decisions, although a lot of the time we're more afraid of other people punishing or judging us than we are of just living with those decisions.

Agree.

I took them more for reassurance than any wisdom they could offer. My experience is so different from others on this site. I'm not thinking of changing my appearance from garden-variety middle-aged male and early on there were messages telling me that I didn't really belong here. If either SAGE or COGIATI had said total he-man I'd have discarded them quickly.

It's just this is such a big change. My wife is half-freaking out even though I'm trying to reassure her that I have more than enough man in the mix to be the husband she wants. A little bit of external validation goes a long way.

[Ariel]

I like tests, so I took the SAGE (the COGIATI is useless to me as female-bodied) and it said androgynous for... everything until the very end when it said "Female-to-Male possible Transsexual." Well, then. It was reassuring, at least, for me.

Carbon, I get what you mean by autism skewing the results--I surely skew more "male" due to autism--but the odd thing is I've found the autistic men I know to be more toward what I'm told is stereotypical "female" stuff once you get past the difficulty remembering people and such. I totally don't buy into that "autism is super-male brain" stuff--it's just different. But from experience, yeah: it's hard to get diagnosed with autism as a female, in no small part because of the automatic assumption that since one is female one would somehow automatically be less likely to be autistic.

I need to get a decent pic and post it!

[Pica Pica]

An indecent one may do

[Carbon]

I like tests, so I took the SAGE (the COGIATI is useless to me as female-bodied) and it said androgynous for... everything until the very end when it said "Female-to-Male possible Transsexual." Well, then. It was reassuring, at least, for me.

Carbon, I get what you mean by autism skewing the results--I surely skew more "male" due to autism--but the odd thing is I've found the autistic men I know to be more toward what I'm told is stereotypical "female" stuff once you get past the difficulty remembering people and such. I totally don't buy into that "autism is super-male brain" stuff--it's just different. But from experience, yeah: it's hard to get diagnosed with autism as a female, in no small part because of the automatic assumption that since one is female one would somehow automatically be less likely to be autistic.

I need to get a decent pic and post it!

It's also harder for women to get diagnosed because they are socialized to respond to problems in a different way than men, so people are more likely to see the problems of autistic boys and take them seriously than they are to notice the problems of autistic girls. I had a lot of trouble getting diagnosed accurately and I didn't get diagnosed until I was an adult. Even though I ostensibly had a "male socialization," I think I responded to my problems more like a girl, by taking my problems out on myself and trying to hide them from other people.

[Pica Pica]

I started this thread with a picture of the high jump, this year it's the long jump.

[V M]

LOL... You have some very brave friends Pica    Love the pic. It's, it's, it's quite alright

[suzifrommd]

Great look, Drill. Masculine hair and glasses and the earring softens it all just a bit.

[Sevan]

This past Monday my local trans* support group was honored at a yearly LGBT award ceremony as the most awesome group/organization. I fretted about what to wear and how to present...and I decided to say screw it, and present as androgyn as I could imagine. I was quite pleased with the results!

Close up of me and my honey.



Full shot. I love how my skirt is swishing as I go to pick up the award on behalf of the group. (Since I'm facilitator/communications coordinator/fearless leader and all..hehe)