Thanks for the replies
i may check out the chat thing, never done that before- guess that shows my age, a young 50ish. and not very good with computers. i'm in the Ft. Worth area, a transplant, and can 'fit in' almost anywhere but not with everyone. never could. maybe because i look at the world differently, a more world kinda view, i have always felt outside. not that i have not tried, i have. i had always wanted the simplest of things, to feel loved and love in return. unfortunatly someone 'upstairs' made it clear it was not allowed in the conventional sense. after each loss i fall back into what is most comfortable in my heart. to be what i am, and always was. try and try again, and well, i did and still love them dearly and thank God for our times. but it is so very clear i am to not allowed that life and what i was even as a kid is what i am today. after so long it is what i am and always will be. my outter skin and inner soul will never be in agreement, and likely no one will ever understand. but life (mine at least) marches on.
sorry i ramble a bit, i look foreword to spending more time here, reading, sharing and learning.
BillieT
