I never could sleep in a recliner.  Which is why I got rid of mine.

Cooking fresh mussels in two batches turned out great.
Cooking a small batch allowed me to toss the bad ones quickly. And cook both meals in one large pan.
If I missed one that went bad overnight in the cold refrigerator it might be safe to eat but I tossed them anyway. Good to check things twice!
Thinking it over allowed me to combine recipes and remember that I like to add a bit of Japanese red pepper Ichimi Togarashi. In an Italian restaurant the key word is Diavolo or "Devil."  Next time I'll add a bit of oregano to mix of bay leaves, EVO, onions, plenty of garlic, and tomatoes.  Normally I don't like the mushy texture and seeds of tomatoes but I read a recipe overnight saying I could just spoon that out! So I did!  I  took the mussels out of the pan as soon as they were open. Reduced the Sauvignon Blanc used to boil the mussels and make a sauce to top the butter coated mussels over pasta.

I think my wife was pleasantly surprised that if she wanted to eat something in particular, I could learn how to cook it!

Allison,
  When I came out to my wife some time ago, she went through all the adjustments or mourning her lost husband. I gave it a lot of time and didn't push. I strived to let her see that I was a better person now and free of the anger and hostilities that had plagued me most of my life. I went slow on the dressing up as well but continued my journey with HRT. Now she has had time to except it we are great friends and our relationship is much better.
Give her time to adjust. I'ts a lot to take in for them. Best wishes
Gina

Traditional dating has the guy making the first move and the girl deciding whether they should date.
Maintaining this pattern suggests the "guy" needs to bring up transition and listen to his wife about how they should proceed. Coming out will affect her as well.

Which is what I did.   I had a bold move, buying an wearing red satin PJs to bed.  We had the talk and set ground rules.

For us, the biggest issue is that I looked good in itty bitty clothes that triggered her own body image issues. I can wear a 2 piece bikini in front of a mirror.
She could not go into a VS.  Nothing fit.

Going slower is a good idea for many girls.  There is a lot to learn if you want to "pass."
You have learned male mannerisms that need to be changed. I think there may be hard wired mannerisms that females on the autism spectrum lack that are present in normal women.

There is an art and science to dressing properly.  Women are constantly judged by how they look.
You may be unfamiliar with this scrutiny, having never faced the consequences of making a horrible choice. 
The rules for guys at weddings are so simple "even a caveman could do it." 
No so for girls.  There are literally landmines everywhere for women.

That was an ancient Chinese proverb!
The "lucky break" was breaking your leg, keeping you home!
For some, being drafted could be a "lucky break"
How so?  Some girls are born into bad economic situations.  Surgery may not be an option.
Being drafted may allow you medical benefits!
Maybe you lose your manhood from a grenade?
The doctor sees you have already signed all the papers indicating what to do.
When you finally regain consciousness you are greeted by your best buddy, who gives you pink panties!
You are delighted to find out that he survived the blast without a scratch!  You caught all the shrapnel and saved him!
You find out that he knew  all along and loves the new you!

First things first, welcome to Susan's Place, Allison!

Quote from: Allison_suddenly on Today at 12:57:48 AMI'm not sure what more I can do. I've given in to all of her requests to slow down my transition as much as possible, and the extreme case of that is not to transition at all. She has asked me not to come out to my kids, to family, or to live as a woman for at least 6 more years. I agreed, and I intend to keep that promise no matter what. I suspect even after those 6 years, transitioning will result in a divorce so I'm mentally preparing myself for not transitioning.

Of course I'm not going to pout and sulk at home all that time, I'll try my best to be present for the marriage and I think I will be happier than my pre-HRT days.

My goodness, it's glaringly obvious from here that the first thing you should do is give it more time. You've given her practically zero time to work through this.

For her  this is the loss of her husband, with all of the accompanying stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. She needs time to process through all of this.

Maybe you need to try couples counselling. I would also ask if you are working through your transition with a therapist?

In any event, you've done yourself a favour by coming here, and I look forward to seeing you around the site!

Hugs, Devlyn

       
      kart      cart

Quote from: davina61 on Today at 03:17:24 AMsore

.             tender

  @Dante   @xSMITHx   @Sunhawk   @LittleBoyBear 
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    @Mayra Viamonte    @DreadLOX

Dear Members:

Everyone here on the Forum are wishing you a very Happy Birthday
                 

Best wishes to you on your "special" day.

NOTE:  On your birthday be sure to look at your
profile and find a special gift!

Warm Regards,
Danielle [Northern Star Girl}
                    [/size][/b]

Much easier said than done.
At the age of 71 and a woman even with my skills I would have difficulty getting another job that pays as well as this one, if I could get another at all. Ageism and misogyny are riff even though both illegal.

As for home, I will never abandon my wife whatever the circumstances. Unlike her I believe in "till death do part".

Sometime I feel like just running away but that is not me.

There are things I have to do, changes I may need to make, but personally I am who I am and that will not change. I have spent much time and effort providing for K but as I have tagged below:

No good deed goes unpunished.

sore